Tsukihime - Hisui Route Scenes (EN)

s323, s414, s386-s401, s402 [h], s403, s404 [h]

True end: s409 [h]=> s412 => s430

Good end: s409 [h]=> choice 2 (choice 1 => s412) => s413 => s531

Bad ends: s396 => s528, s410 => s529

*s323
See? I told you so.

―― What's bad you say? Hisui was bad. Kohaku-san and Akiha seemed to be already used to drinking alcohol, but as far as Hisui is concerned, it was her first time seriously drinking. Still, she drank to keep me company, trying hard to finish her glass. And this was what happened. "Um, Hisui―? There's no reason for you to force yourself to drink like that." "―――" Hisui nods. And then, she takes the glass to her lips and she looks around aimlessly. ―― No matter how much I try to stop her, Hisui keeps sipping out of her glass. ―― I don't really understand it, but perhaps Hisui has taken a liking to alcohol. ---And then― "Ah―――" With that, Hisui curls onto the sofa like a cat. "Ahaha. You can't be doing that, Hisui-chan. If you sleep there, you'll catch a cold. Come on, Akiha-sama, please don't complain." With a smile, Kohaku-san talks to the sleeping Akiha and Hisui. ―― It seems Kohaku-san is drunk too. "―― It really was your first time, wasn't it, Hisui?" "Yes. Hisui-chan has always been pretty weak with alcohol. Usually, she takes a sip and she turns completely red. Ahaha~!" Kohaku-san laughs brightly. "―― It seems like we have quite a problem, don't we?" "Yes. Hisui-chan always turns down alcohol, but since Shiki-san offered, she pushed herself. She is normally not very sociable, so I guess she at least tried to keep you company. Isn't my sister so cute!?" Bam-bam, Kohaku-san slaps my back. ―― Kohaku-san is quite drunk too― "I guess this wraps up the night. Akiha is hammered and Hisui is all curled up." "―― Hammered― what is that? Nii-san, please don't use words, that I can't, understand――" Akiha complains in a murmuring voice. It seems that Akiha doesn't like things she doesn't understand. That's all good, but it seems when she's drunk, she doesn't understand anything― consequently, she has turned into a complaining machine― "Well then, I will carry Akiha-sama, so Shiki-san, could you please take care of Hisui-chan?" "Eh---wait a second Kohaku-san. I can't touch Hisui. I just brushed against her earlier and she hit me." "---That's right. Now that you mention it, Hisui-chan is a little obsessed about cleanliness. Even just holding hands with a man will cause her to throw up. If you hold her, I suppose there would be a problem." "―― Just holding hands and throwing up――?" That goes beyond just being obsessed with cleanliness. I thought she was strange eight years ago, but Hisui "But, if Hisui-chan is sleeping, then it will be okay. Well, Akiha-sama, let's go back to your room." "What? Wait, Kohaku-san!" ―― She doesn't respond. With Akiha over her shoulders, she disappears out of the dining room. What she left behind― A mountain of uneaten food, a mountain of empty bottles, and the contentedly sleeping Hisui, who is breathing softly on the sofa. It truly is autumn. Sleeping there like that, she will certainly catch a cold. "―― Is it okay to touch Hisui like this?" But, it can't be helped. ―― I don't have any bad intentions, and I do have to get her up to her room. "―― Sorry. You can be mad at me later." I lift up the sleeping Hisui. "Ah――" With just that, my heart begins to pound. "―― Light." Just like I thought, Hisui is very light. Her delicate body fits in my arms. Softness and the warmth of her body. "―― This isn't good. I have to take her to her room quickly or I'll be the one in trouble." So as not to wake Hisui, I slowly carry her out of the dining room. I turn the doorknob to Hisui's room, and I stop, stunned. "No way." It's locked. "The key― must be in Hisui's pocket, right?" This is bad. No, it's just reaching my hand in her pocket, but it's bad. If I did that, who knows where my mind will go. "―― Oh well, that's how it is." Fortunately, both Hisui's room and my room are on the second floor. --So, I came back to my room with Hisui still in my arms. "There we go." I place Hisui on my bed. I guess she really pushed herself drinking alcohol, as she does not wake up. "―― Well. What should I do now---" "Huh?" Am I that tired from carrying Hisui? I fall to the carpet. "Umph---" It seems like the alcohol is having an effect on me too. Suddenly, I start to feel very dizzy. "―― Well― whatever." I hadn't really planned on doing anything anyway. Even if I go to sleep on the floor like this, I don't think anyone will complain--- ---Something seems― very familiar. An old Japanese-style room. A dark room. ---That is, that's an extremely old memory. When I was very young, I wasn't used to the new people that took me in, so I locked myself up in my room. I didn't care for anything; I didn't want to talk to anyone. Always, always alone, and I wanted to be swaddled in the cradle of my happy memories. Even if I knew there would be nothing like that for me ever again, I still wanted to do so. Knock knock, came a sound. "―― Who is it?" "It's me." Ah, she came again. That girl around my age was knocking on the door again. "Shiki-chan, let's play. You'll get moldy if you stay in a place like that." "I don't wanna. I don't like going outside." Hugging my knees, I huddled in a corner of the dark room. ―― That girl came every day. She would always knock, never getting tired of it. She would never force me out, so she would not open the door, but just continued to call my name. "Why won't you come outside?" Because there's no one that I know outside. Everyone hates me outside. "That's not true. Everyone wants to like you, Shiki-kun." Yes. I knew that, but I couldn't believe it. Because my father went outside, and--- And. He was torn to pieces. "―― I see. No wonder you can't trust anyone." Yeah, that's why I will always stay here. I don't want any more scary things happening. "But, you will just be by yourself all the time. Being by yourself is no fun." Even if it's no fun, it is better than being scared. "That's, that's not fun at all. Then, Shiki-chan, you can believe in me." ―― You say I can believe in you. That's a little backwards. Don't people normally say, "I believe you?" "It's okay! Shiki-chan, you can trust me and come out!" ―― Fine. But, believe― what should I believe in? "Simple. Even if everyone hates you, I will still like you, Shiki-chan. Because I like you, I always come and ask you to play." ――― Is outside, fun? "Yeah! It's much, much more fun than being by yourself-!" And then, I went outside. Come to think of it, that was my first memory as Tohno Shiki ---A bright light floods my consciousness. As I open my eyes, the morning light shines through the window. "――― Nnn." I wake from my dream. ―― I don't quite remember it, but I remember vaguely watching a dream. It was very nostalgic. The smell of tatami---is that what it was? "Huh?" That's strange, even though I'm awake, I still smell a nice scent. "N---Shi――― ki―――" I hear a voice by my ear. "―― Eh?" Sensing something beside me, my dozing eyes fly open. "――― sssssst!" I frantically stop my surprised shout. I don't know why, but Hisui is sleeping in my bed. A-And that's not all. At the same time, leaning right up against me, is her completely unguarded sleeping face. "Ah" Tense as I am, I can't say a thing. My sleepiness disappears in a flash. "―― What's going on?" Moving just my neck, I glance around. ―― Without a doubt, this is my room. Hisui lies there, breathing softly. "―― Let's see, yesterday we―" I try to remember what happened yesterday, but that's not important. Hisui's breathing is on my chest. ―― Her peaceful, sleeping face. For now, just being able to see that so closely, makes me not care about anything else. "――――" I'm completely absorbed. It's not that I didn't realize it before, but Hisui is really pretty. It's not that she just has a beautiful face. Rather, her graceful atmosphere, I can't help but think that it is pretty. "―――――― Hisui." If I could, I would like to stay this way forever. But that can't happen― Besides, unless Hisui wakes up soon, there will be a lot of trouble. "―― Hisui. Hey, Hisui." ―― I call, but she doesn't seem to wake up. "Hey, it's morning. Isn't it time to get up?" I gently shake Hisui. "Hisui. Wake up, Hisui." "U― nh." Hisui's fingers start to twitch. Hisui's eyelids slowly open, like melting ice. "――― Mm." Waveringly stretching out her arms, Hisui wakes up. She looks around the room rubbing her eyes for a few seconds. Hisui finally grasps the fact that she is in my room, and the fact that I am right in front of her. "Kyaaa!" Hisui jumps up from the bed. "Shi, Shiki-sama, why am I" "I― I can't explain it very well, but do you remember about last night?" "Eh---about last night?" Hisui starts to think. And all of a sudden, Hisui's cheeks turn red. "You remembered?" "Yes―― I caused you a lot of trouble, Shiki-sama." With flushed cheeks, Hisui looks right at me. "―― Sorry about that. I went to your room, but it was locked and I couldn't enter. I thought you could sleep in my room while I went to get Kohaku-san, but the alcohol got to me and just like that, I fell asleep." ―― Yeah, that's exactly how I remember it. But that's odd, last night I thought for sure― "―― That's odd, I thought that I went to sleep on the carpet, but― sometime during the night I must have got on the bed. Ah, I wasn't thinking of doing anything weird to you, Hisui! I just now woke up too――!" "――――" Hisui stares at me silently. "I, I mean it! I didn't have a choice, Kohaku-san had to take care of Akiha, and I couldn't just leave you alone like that! ―― I apologize for holding you, and I was ready for you to get mad at me for doing that!" Trying to answer Hisui's direct gaze, and I try my utmost to explain. "―――――" Hisui doesn't answer; she just looks over her clothes and nods. "It appears that way. My clothing does not appear to be tampered with. You are innocent, Shiki-sama." "Good" I breathe a sigh of relief. "And I think the one who placed you on the bed― was me. I woke up once during the night and saw you sleeping on the floor. I did not want you to catch a cold, so I remember getting you to sleep on the bed." "Eh―― for real?" If that's true, then that would explain why I was in bed, but why was Hisui sleeping on the bed too? "―― Please forgive me. I, I was still a little drunk, and I thought that since there was a bed in front of me, I wouldn't need to go back to my room―" Embarrassed, Hisui explains what happened. "I-I see. Certainly, that's how you think when you are drunk. Hahaha." I start to laugh for some reason. Embarrassed, Hisui drops her shoulders. ―― Why is it? Even though I was only sleeping next to her, I get so conscious of Hisui, I am unable to say anything clearly. "A, anyway, let's just keep this a secret between us. If Akiha knew about it, she'd get angry, and if Kohaku-san knew about it, she'd just tease us about it relentlessly." "---Yes. If Shiki-sama will allow it, then it will help me as well." "Yeah, sorry Hisui. If I was more responsible, this thing would never have happened." I say sorry and bow my head to her. Nothing did happen, but it's still a fact that I carried a girl to my room and slept next to her. No matter what Hisui says, I think I'm responsible. "Not at all, it is my fault. If I was more responsible, then you would never have had to worry about any of this, Shiki-sama." "No, it's okay. Anyway, I just want to apologize. ―― I'd actually feel better if you say something like 'Shiki-sama is a jerk.' You have every right to, although I don't think you'd say something like that." "Ah― Yes. That kind of order, would be very troubling." "Wouldn't it? So let me apologize. If you don't let me, then I will never trust you with anything again." "――――" Hisui just stares at me, deep in thought. "―― Shiki-sama is― really clumsy, are you not?" Hisui says this in an awfully kind voice, different from before. "Well then, I'll say Shiki-sama is at fault this time. I will have to let you make up for this sometime, so please do not forget." "Eh-Hisu,i?" "If you will please excuse me. Shiki-sama, please hurry to the sitting room or you will be late." Hisui gives a perfect bow and exits the room. "-" I just remained there on my bed, mouth open and in stunned silence. "――― She smiled." For that instant, it seemed like time itself had stopped. "---" This isn't good. This is really not good. All she did was smile, but why am I so stunned---? I go to the sitting room and see Hisui standing there. Akiha has already eaten breakfast and is drinking tea, and it seems that Kohaku-san is in the kitchen. "Good morning, Nii-san. You're up very early this morning, aren't you?" "Hm? Ah, this morning there was a little trouble―" I stop short and steal a glance at Hisui's face. "Well, I just happened to wake up early today. But you're pretty impressive too, Akiha. To still wake up this early as drunk as you were yesterday." "Of course. You should always drink considering the next day, so there is no reason to oversleep because of it." "Really. But you were pretty hammered last night. Maybe you have more breakdown enzymes than a normal person, Akiha. If that's so, I'm a little jealous." "Nii-san, what are these, 'breakdown enzymes'?" "Well, I'll make it short. After alcohol enters the body, I guess it changes to some kind of poison. The poison is processed by the liver by these enzymes that break down the alcohol into water. The amount of enzymes in each person is different, and Japanese people tend to have less than others. You can say those that have less enzymes have to moderate a little." Akiha looks impressed. "―― I am a little surprised. You seem to know quite a bit, Nii-san." "No, not really. I just have a bad friend that drinks a lot, that's all." "Is that so. It seems like you were not drinking that much last night though―" "That's because I'm one of those people that have to moderate. Since my bad friend simply downs his drinks, I have to always stay sober to take care of him." By the way, this bad friend I'm talking about is no other than Inui Arihiko. "―― Hmm. I don't really understand it, but it seems like your private life is very fun indeed." "Why that all of a sudden? Why do you bring that up?" "Nii-san, your face seemed so happy just now. You didn't show that face last night." "Uh---" Well, it is true that last night was more surprising than it was fun. "Shiki-san, breakfast is ready!" With excellent timing, Kohaku-san's voice cuts in. "Ah, I'll be right there! ―― Well, I gotta go, Akiha." "―――" After finishing breakfast, I head to the sitting room to find Akiha gone. "Huh―? Hisui, where is Akiha?" "Akiha-sama left for school right after you went to the dining room, Shiki-sama." "Oh yeah, Akiha's school is far, isn't it? ―― Well, I shouldn't be standing around either." "Yes, I will bring you your bag right away." Hisui disappears towards the lobby. "――――" I stare listlessly behind her. "Hee hee. Shiki-san, what happened last night?" "Wha― what do you mean, Kohaku-san!?" "Oh my, I see you're blushing. Something must have happened, didn't it?" "Eh---no, nothing happened at all. Go ahead, ask Hisui." "Is that so? It seems like you have become pretty good friends with Hisui-chan." Kohaku-san tilts her head to the side. ―― I became good friends with Hisui? That's something I'd like to hear about myself. "Shiki-sama, I have your bag ready. Please get ready to leave the mansion as you do not have much time left." "Yeah, I'm coming. Later, Kohaku-san, see you this evening." "Yes, I look forward to it." "I'll come right back today, so I'll be back around four o'clock. Oh, and you don't have to wait here." "I understand. Please be careful on your way, Shiki-sama." "Thanks. I'll be going now, Hisui." Waving a hand to the bowing Hisui, I dash down the street.

*s414
―― No, I don't feel like it at all. I know Kohaku-san just wants me to feel good, but I can't forget about Yumizuka right now. These past two days. After I've seen so much of other people's blood, I can't be welcomed by them. "Sorry. I'm really happy that you asked, but I just don't feel like it right now" ---Thump. Thump. "Huh?" --My head is pounding. Suddenly. ---Pound. Pound. I feel, very dizzy. "Shiki-sama---?" Hisui hesitantly calls my name. ―― Hisui seems to have noticed my sudden dizziness which neither Akiha nor Kohaku-san realized, and which I barely realized myself. But that doesn't stop it from getting worse. Thud. Just like a puppet without any strings, I collapse to the floor. "Shiki-sama, get a hold of yourself, Shiki-sama――!" Hisui's voice grows distant. ―― Ah, I really am pretty pathetic. Just thinking about Yumizuka and what happened, I lose consciousness like this "Ah-" When I come to, I'm lying in my room. While I was sleeping, Akiha must have been watching me because she is there in front of me. "Aki, ha?" "Nii-san? You finally got up." Akiha visibly relaxes. "I―― that's right, I must have passed out from my anemia again." "Yes. You slept for about seven hours, Nii-san." "---Really. I haven't been sleeping enough recently, that might be why. ―― Sorry. I've caused you trouble again." "What are you saying? Your condition isn't your fault, right? It is only natural for me to take care of my own brother, Nii-san. You saying that you are a trouble to me is actually more troublesome than me watching over you." "―― I see. Well, I won't say thanks than. It's only natural, since we are brother and sister." "Well, if you can say all that, then I suppose you must be alright." saying that, she takes my temperature. Thirty seven degrees Celsius. That's just one more degree than normal. "―― I still feel a little uneasy, but you look fine, so I guess it is okay for me to leave you by yourself. I'll be in my room then." "――? What, Akiha?" "Please give your thanks to Hisui. She is the one that cared for you all this time." After wishing me well, she leaves the room. "―― Hisui―― was the one who cared for me?" Come to think of it, I heard her voice before I passed out. Even though I'm sure Akiha and Kohaku-san must have said something, Hisui's was the only voice that I heard coming towards me. I start to get dizzy. "――― I guess I'm not fully well yet." I take a deep breath. My day off ended before I knew it. ―― Well, if Hisui was watching over me all day, then I suppose it wasn't a bad thing ---Something seems― very familiar. An old Japanese-style room. A dark room. ---That is, that's an extremely old memory. When I was very young, I wasn't used to the new people that took me in, so I locked myself up in my room. I didn't care for anything; I didn't want to talk to anyone. Always, always alone, and I wanted to be swaddled in a cradle of my happy memories. Even if I knew there would be nothing like that for me ever again, I still wanted to do so. Knock knock, came a sound. "―― Who is it?" "It's me." Ah, she came again. That girl around my age was knocking on the door again. "SHIKI-chan, let's play. You'll get moldy if you stay in a place like that." "I don't wanna. I don't like going outside." Hugging my knees, I huddled in a corner of the dark room. ―― That girl came every day. She would always knock, never getting tired of it. She would never force me out, so she would not open the door, but just continued to call my name. "Why won't you come outside?" Because there's no one that I know outside. Everyone hates me outside. "That's not true. Everyone wants to like you, SHIKI-kun." Yes. I knew that, but I couldn't believe it. Because my father went outside, and--- And. He was torn to pieces. "―― I see. No wonder you can't trust anyone." Yeah, that's why I will always stay here. I don't want any more scary things happening. "But, you will just be by yourself all the time. Being by yourself is no fun." Even if it's no fun, it is better than being scared. "That's, that's not fun at all. Then, SHIKI-chan, you can believe in me." ―― You say I can believe in you. That's a little backwards. Don't people normally say, "I believe you?" "It's okay! SHIKI-chan, you can trust me and come out! ―― Fine, but, believe, what should I believe in? "Simple. Even if everyone hates you, I will still like you, SHIKI-chan. Because I like you, I always come and ask you to play." ――― Is outside, fun? "Yeah! It's much, much more fun than being by yourself-!" ---A bright light floods my consciousness. As I open my eyes, the morning light shines through the window. "――― Nnn." I wake from my dream. ―― I don't quite remember it, but I remember vaguely watching a dream. It was very nostalgic. The smell of tatami---is that what it was? "Shiki-sama, are you awake?" Knock knock. I hear Hisui's voice. "Yeah, I'm up, so you can come in." "Yes. Please excuse me." With a bow, Hisui enters the room. "Shiki-sama, how are you feeling? If you feel bad, please do not hesitate to tell me." Hisui stares over at me as I lay in bed. ―― It seems she is still really worried about me collapsing so suddenly yesterday. "I'm fine, there's nothing wrong with me. I collapsed yesterday because I've been pushing myself recently, but that won't happen again." Yumizuka---the vampire does not exist anymore. Therefore, I won't have to walk the streets late at night anymore, like I did these past few days. "If you say that is the case, then---" I don't know what else she is worried about, but she looks at me uneasily. "Well, thank you for worrying about me." I jump out of bed. "As you can see, I'm just fine. I'll change real quick, so please go ahead of me to the sitting room." Hisui still stares at me with an expression that looks like she wants to say something more. But, that look passes. "―― As you wish. Well then, please excuse me." Hisui places my fresh clothes down and exits the room. "―― What was that all about? Do I look that pale?" My reflection on the window glass looks pretty normal to me. Anyways, I should hurry up and change, then head to the sitting room. I go to the sitting room and see Hisui standing there. Akiha has already eaten breakfast and is now drinking tea. Kohaku-san seems to be in the kitchen. "Good morning, Nii-san. You seem like you've recovered." In contrast to me, she seems very calm and collected. "Yeah, good morning Akiha. Sorry for being such a burden last night." "―― Nii-san, don't make me repeat myself. I didn't consider that a burden, and if you are to thank someone, thank Hisui." She closes her eyes in displeasure. "I see." Those words remind me that I haven't thanked Hisui yet. "―― Hisui. This is a little late, but thanks for what you did yesterday. Since my body's this way, I'm sorry I caused you a lot of trouble." "No, I am the one who should apologize. I was not attentive to your condition." Hisui bows. "No, it's really my fault. You don't need to apologize." "But protecting your health is my duty. It is my fault for suggesting things without thinking about your health." "―――― Uh." That suggestion, she must mean last night's welcome party. Actually, it was Kohaku-san's suggestion, and Hisui only agreed with it. "That has nothing to do with it, so---" "Nii-san, this is starting to get a little pointless. If Hisui says that is the case, then let it be." Akiha stands up from the sofa. "Well, it is now time, so I'll excuse myself. Nii-san, can you hurry to the dining room and eat your breakfast?" "Wh―― Of course I will eat breakfast." "Breakfast is already prepared. It's almost seven-thirty, so you should hurry up or you'll be late." Akiha elegantly strolls out of the sitting room. "Shiki-sama, please eat. As Akiha-sama stated, you do not have much time." "―― Right. I'll go to the dining room." I eat breakfast and go to the entrance of the mansion. Hisui already went to get my bag and has it when I get there. "I'll come back right after school, so I should be home around four o'clock. Oh, and you don't have to wait for me here." "I understand. Shiki-sama, please be careful on your way." "Thanks. I'll get going, Hisui." Waving a hand to the bowing Hisui, I dash down the street.

*s386
I get to the classroom, and the class starts uneventfully, as always. ―― There's no one at Yumizuka's desk. Even though a classmate is gone forever, class life remains unchanged. "―――" I become a little uneasy. Because of Hisui, I had forgotten all about that. Perhaps because of that incident? With that uneasiness, my thoughts drift towards the sky. Before I realized it, the school day was over. I let out a sigh. I don't really feel like seeing Arihiko or Senpai. Right now, it seems I'm just more at ease in the Tohno mansion than in school. I enter the lobby and immediately encounter Hisui. "Welcome back, Shiki-sama." "I'm home, Hisui. Are Kohaku-san and Akiha here?" "Akiha-sama has not returned yet. Nee-san will most likely be in the rear courtyard sweeping." "As usual. Well, I'll be in my room; please continue whatever you were doing." "Yes. Please excuse me." I head up the stairs to the second floor. "Ah, Shiki-sama?" "Hm?" "I will be in Makihisa-sama's room sorting things out. If you need me, please call for me." Hisui disappears towards the east end of the mansion. Putting down my bag, I take off my jacket. "―― Well, then." There's still time until evening, so what should I do?

*s387
---I'll go see Hisui. "―― But Hisui doesn't let me help her, and I don't want to get in her way――" ―― What should I do? I don't want to be a burden. But for some reason, I want to see her. "―― Ah." That reminds me. I still need to give her back the ribbon. Hisui said she'd forgotten about it, but the ribbon is hers. There's really no point in me holding on to it, so I should give it back. In the old man's old room, Hisui is arranging books. Even though it is no longer being used, his room is still being cleaned like before. "Hisui, can I have a minute?" "Ah---Shiki-sama. Yes, what is it?" "I know we talked about this earlier, but I thought I should give this back." I pull out the ribbon Hisui gave me eight years ago. "――――――" "Hisui? So, you honestly don't want it――?" "――No, I will take it. It is important to me, after all." Taking the ribbon, Hisui becomes silent. "――――" I can't talk to her. The Hisui in front of me right now looks very much like the Hisui from eight years ago, distant from the ones around her. "Shiki-sama, is this all you came to do?" I can't seem to speak, so I just nod. "In that case, please return to your room. I still have some work remaining." Hisui walks towards the center of the room. "―― Hisui." Did that ribbon have any special meaning? This eight year period. I think I may have finally fulfilled my promise, even if it was too late. "―― Then, I'll go to my room. See you later, Hisui." With that, I leave the room.

*s388
---I'll go help Kohaku-san. I go out to the courtyard and see Kohaku-san holding a broom. I suppose she is done with the rear courtyard, and is now humming in the courtyard while sweeping the leaves. "Huh? What is the matter, Shiki-san, coming out to the courtyard at this time?" "Ah―― Nothing. I was just bored, so I thought I'd come help you. Are you done already?" "Yes, I just finished the rear courtyard. Since there was some time before I had to prepare dinner, I thought I should sweep the courtyard as well." It seems Kohaku-san is rather industrious, as she has already taken care of most of the leaves. "―― I guess I'm no help. Kohaku-san, you almost cleaned up all the leaves in the whole courtyard already." "Yes, taking care of the garden has always been my job. Taking care of the garden in the rear courtyard, the woods, and the maples to the south are also my responsibility." "Wow, your job is not just to take care of the flower bed, but also the woods?" ―― Hold on a minute here. Does that mean―? "Um, Kohaku-san. There is this huge tree in the middle of the woods. Do you take care of that too?" "No, how could I, Shiki-san? That tree has been at the mansion for a long time. I can't take care of something that big." As if she was having a lot of fun, Kohaku-san smiles happily. "But that tree is very important. From the second floor of the mansion in the hallway, you can see that tree very well. As a child, I would use it as a landmark to find many things." "I see---I too have memories of that tree, although it was just once." ―― But it seems like there isn't any meaning to it anymore. The girl from that time---Hisui didn't think much about the promise we made. It was eight years ago, so I guess it can't be helped if she thinks differently now. "Ah, it's almost time. Well then, Shiki-san, when it's time for dinner, please come to the dining room." With that, Kohaku-san disappears, her footsteps echoing in the air. I'm sure all the ingredients are set, and all that remains is preparing the food. "―― I guess I should head back to my room." After staring a little more at the big tree in the middle of the woods, I leave the courtyard.

*s389
I'll go to Akiha's room. ―― I heard that Akiha hasn't returned yet. Which means that if I go to her room, no one will be there. ―― I arrive at her room. Akiha's room is in the middle of the east wing. My room is about forty meters away, so this a rare opportunity. "-" I gulp anxiously. ―― If I think about it calmly, I'm doing something extremely dangerous. "--I can't go back now!" Making up my mind, I open the door to Akiha's room. "-" ―― I expected this― but still, I'm at a loss for words. I am fascinated by the room that looks nothing like any high schooler's room. "―― There's no bed―― it must be in a separate room." I almost forget myself looking at all the luxury. I thought I'd explore Akiha's room while she isn't here, but this isn't a place where you can come in like that. "―― I better go before Akiha finds me." With a sigh, I turn to leave the room. And. "Oh no, please, take your time, Nii-san." ---Akiha is standing in front of the door with her arms crossed. "Ah, AkihaYou've come back already――!?" "Yes, I just got back. More importantly, Nii-san, is there something you want to talk to me about? There has to be, otherwise there would be no reason for you to be in my room alone, now, would there?" "Ahum." I back up as Akiha glares at me intently. "No, I---it's not really important― I just thought I'd talk with you for a bit---" "Oh really? That's strange. If you wanted to talk to me, going into my room when I'm not there is rather pointless, isn't it? It makes perfect sense that if you saw I was not in my room, you would go back to your room, right?" "That's true, but―― I thought maybe I should just wait a while in your room or maybe I didn't――" "---" Akiha's stare becomes even harder. ―― Ugh, I think it's best if I just apologize right now. "―― Sorry. I just was wondering what your room was like." "In other words, you sneaked into my room out of curiosity?" "Uh---no, I had no bad intentions---" "It doesn't matter! Sneaking into a girl's room like that, what kind of upbringing did you have at the Arima household!?" "---I'm sorry. I guess you can call this my stupidity, or my mischievous mind." "---" Akiha's gaze is painful. Since I'm the only one at fault, I only can apologize. "―― Fine, I will overlook it this time. Please go back to your room before Kohaku comes." "S―― sorry, Akiha." It seems that Onii-chan is just a mischievous brat after all. "But don't think that this matter is over. I expect to be compensated for this, Nii-san." For some reason, there is a hint of both amusement and threat in Akiha's voice as she steps away from the door. "――――" I leave Akiha's room thinking that she has grasped my terrible weakness.

*s390
---After dinner, I return to my room. It's ten at night. Since I had tea with Akiha and the others after dinner, it's already time for bed. "Nnn――" I'm not really tired, but my body feels sluggish. It seems like I've finally gotten used to life in this mansion. Expressionless Hisui, bright and cheery Kohaku, and Akiha, who worries over me constantly. ―― Certainly, getting used to this lifestyle― is fun. It seems like I've returned to the me that existed eight years ago. I never had a chance to relax this much when living with the Arimas. The Arimas have a child in middle school as well, but we were always distant and we never really had a chance to talk. "Nnn―― I really am sleepy." Changing into my pajamas, I lie down in bed. I'll go to bed early, wake up early, and give Akiha quite a surprise--- "Huh?" All of a sudden, I find myself in town. Midnight. I walk through the empty town. I pant heavily. For some reason, I'm out of breath. I. With bloodshot eyes, I am looking at people walking down the street. Foolish people. Walking the streets so carelessly even though the killer has not been caught. Do they think that they're special and won't get killed? Or maybe, they want to die but are unable to kill themselves and want someone to kill them? Well, it's probably the latter. ---A group of people that I don't know continues to walk by. That's not the person. That's not the person. That's not the person. I diligently stare at them one by one, but shake my head. That's not the person. That's not the person. That's not the person. I still can't find that person. I definitely heard what this person looks like, but I can't seem to find that person. I'm  getting  a little   annoyed. Not here. Not here. Not here. Not here. Why. Not here. Not here. Not here. Not here. I start panting even more. It's really ticking me off. Why isn't that person here, why isn't that person here, why isn't that person here, why isn't that person here, why isn't that person here, why isn't that person here-!? "Ku-haha, ha." I've decided. Tonight, I'll change my plan. Anyone will do. If I can kill, anyone will do. Once more. Once more, I want to taste that wonderful sensation ---There. A girl with long hair walks by. "Aki, ha!" Yeah, that is Akiha. Akiha. Akiha. My sister. My beautiful sister, only mine. That is what I want. My sister, only mine. She is definitely mine, and mine only. I kill her from behind, taking care not to damage her body. Holding her long hair, I drag her body. Heavy breathing. Biting into her neck, I suck her blood. -My breath becomes wild. This murder is different than the others. Akiha. Just thinking this is Akiha makes it feel so wonderful. My brain becomes numb. I get fully aroused. As I suck her blood, sucking every last drop of blood, I ejaculate over and over. "H--huh?" When it's all over, I realize it. "―― Who is this person? This isn't Akiha at all――!" I'm angry. Even though I slice the body into pieces, I'm still mad. Impostor. This impostor is pissing me off. *pant**pant**pant* I've used up extra energy. The night isn't that long. Once it becomes morning, Shiki will awaken. "I'm tired tonight. I'll start again, tomorrow." Yeah, that'll do. That's what I'll do. Now then. Before the morning comes, before anyone realizes, I must go back to my own bed

*s391
"Ah---!" Ah---. I gasp for air. It's---morning― now. This is my room. Up until now, I've been here, just like this, and I should have been sleeping- "Ahh――" My forehead is hurting. "Dre―― am." I had a terrible dream. A dream where I killed someone. A dream where I ejaculated over and over as I killed. "Ho―― t―" My throat is burning. My body feels like lead, and my hands― The feeling of breaking someone's neck still lingers on my hands. "That― can't be." That can't be. That was a dream. Unmistakably a dream. But are dreams really that vivid? I remember it so vividly. The street in the dead of night, the feeling of snapping someone's neck, the stickiness of blood gurgling down my throat, the face of the woman so cruelly killed- But it's merely a dream. Since I'm here, it had to have been a dream. But the problem is― I am dreaming that I am having fun killing people. ---You and I are the same, Shiki-kun. Before my eyes, the world starts spinning. ---Someone who can't resist the pleasure from killing. And that crazy speed. "Excuse me," Hisui says as she enters the room. "Good morning. It seems that you have already awakened, Shiki-sama." "――― Ah. Morning, Hisui." The world stops spinning. As soon as Hisui spoke, the whirlpool I was trapped in disappeared like an illusion. "―― Shiki-sama?" "Eh-what is it, Hisui?" "How are you feeling this morning? You are not saying anything." "―― Ah, sorry, I was just staring at you. I understand; I have to go to school. I'll go to the sitting room right away, so wait for me there." "Shiki-sama. If you are not feeling well, please do not push yourself. Your health is more important than school." "Haha, no way, Hisui. I can't skip school. It's nothing---really. So don't spoil me like that." "No, please rest. I will tell Akiha-sama so please rest." Hisui is unusually persistent. ―― Does my face look that haggard? "Hisui, you worry too much. It really is nothing at all, so don't worry about it― I'll just wash my face, so please wait for me in the sitting room." Getting out of bed, I walk past Hisui, who seems like she wants to say more. Leaving the room, it is a little painful seeing Hisui watch me with such uneasiness in her eyes. I look in the mirror in the bathroom. "―― I don't look like I'm sick. Why is Hisui worrying so much?" I splash cold water onto my face. ---Just thinking about the dream I had last night makes me want to puke and not go to school. But if I stay home from school because of that, that will just be like confirming something, which makes me feel uneasy. Akiha and Kohaku-san are in the sitting room, and Hisui is standing nearby. As usual, I'm the last one to enter the room. "Ah, good morning, Shiki-san." "No way!? It isn't even six-thirty yet!" Kohaku-san looks towards me with a soft smile while Akiha gets up from the sofa and gapes at me in surprise. "Good morning, Kohaku-san, oh, and Akiha too." "Wha― What do you mean, 'Akiha too?'" "Well, 'Akiha too' means 'Akiha too'. That should be enough for someone who's so surprised to see me get up early when you tell me to get up early every day." "I see. Nii-san, you wake up early for once and now you triumphantly walk around with your head held high." "Head held high, Akiha---" Head. Neck. Neck――? I remember the sensations from my dream and feel like vomiting. "―― Sorry, Kohaku-san. I don't mean to be a bother, but could you get me something cold to drink before I eat?" "Not at all. Would you like soda or fruit juice?" "Ummm, I'll have a soda please." "Coming right up." Kohaku-san disappears towards the kitchen. "―― Nii-san? You're not arguing back. Are you feeling alright?" "―― Geez. You and even Hisui, what do you think I am? I just woke up early and my throat is dry, there isn't anything wrong with me―!" Trying to resist the urge to vomit, I shout back. "―― I'm sorry, Nii-san. But there is obviously something wrong, and I want to help." "Ah---no, that's not it. The fact that you're worried about me makes me really happy. I just had a really bad nightmare last night and my mind is elsewhere, that's all. ―― I'm sorry, Akiha. I'm the one who should apologize." I sit down on the sofa. I know that something's wrong with me, but I can't do anything about it. "Nii-san, is there something bothering you? If it's something to do with this mansion, please tell me, and I'm sure I can be of help―" "No, it isn't that I'm not used to living here---" ―― That's right. Maybe if I ask her indirectly, it might help me feel better. I decide to---

*s392
I decide that it's better to do it than not. Besides, I keep on thinking for the worst since I'm keeping this to myself. "―― Well, then let me ask you a question. If someone does things they know they shouldn't do, would that be a result of stress?" "Doing something they know they shouldn't do? Is it a recurring problem or just an accident?" "―― Well, it's more like an accident. It seems that the person really isn't that conscious." "So you mean they're doing things while unconscious, so they can't stop themselves from doing it?" "---That's right, they can't stop. They can't even get themselves to think about stopping." "In that case, it sounds like a personality inversion." "―― Personality inversion―― you mean their personality gets reversed?" "Yes. For whatever reason, something triggers a change in the person and their entire moral spectrum, their whole attitude gets reversed." "It may be termed a disease of the mind. Don't you remember, Nii-san? Father was usually a very kind person, but sometimes he would just turn cold as ice." "The old man was---?" ―― Come to think of it―― Tohno Makihisa was extremely kind one day and extremely strict the next. "―― I don't remember that well. Do you remember, Hisui?" I look at Hisui, who is standing by the wall. ---And. It looks like Hisui is trying to contain herself and can't hear my voice. "Akiha-sama, please don't talk about any of that. Makihisa-sama was just a little manic-depressive, that's all." Kohaku-san says this as she brings a silver tray with a glass on it. "You shouldn't say bad things about those who have departed. And besides, Makihisa-sama is your father, too." "I, I know――! I don't need you to tell me that――!" Akiha joins Hisui in silence. "Here you go, Shiki-san. Thanks for waiting." Kohaku-san puts the glass of Lemon Squash onto the table. "Thanks." Using a straw, I let the cool drink fill my body. ―― The rest of the time, Akiha and Hisui never open their mouths. The only cheerful one in the sitting room is Kohaku-san. ―― I don't understand why everyone became so depressed, but the old man is definitely connected to it. "Please be careful on your way, Shiki-sama." "Ah, I'll be going―― Hisui?" "―― Yes, what is it, Shiki-sama?" "When we were talking earlier, about my old man. You were deathly quiet. Not just you, but Akiha as well." "Did something happen to that old man in the eight years I was gone? You and Akiha were both acting strange earlier." "――――――――" Hisui doesn't answer. "―― I see. Well, I won't force you to answer. If you ever feel like it, we can talk about it." "---No. This is not something that concerns you, Shiki-sama. "Shiki-sama, if you are going to live in this mansion, please do not ever mention Makihisa-sama again." After Hisui's eyes flash for a brief instant, she heads back to the mansion.

*s393
---No, I really shouldn't make Akiha and the others worry about any of this. This problem---that dream, I should take care of it myself. "---It's just that things at school are keeping me busy. In November, there's the school festival, and before that, the athletic festival." "―― Is that so? Since it's a school problem, then there isn't really anything I can do to help, I suppose." Akiha lowers her gaze, a little disappointed. ―― Deceiving Akiha by telling her a lie is very painful. "Here you go, Shiki-san. Thanks for waiting." Kohaku-san comes carrying a glass on a tray. "Thanks." Using a straw, I drink the Lemon Squash that Kohaku-san got for me. ―― With that, the conversation ends. The only cheerful one in the sitting room is Kohaku-san, and I end up eating breakfast like always. Hisui walks with me to the gate to see me off. Just like before in the sitting room, Hisui continues her silence, which makes me uneasy. "Please take care on your way, Shiki-sama." "Yeah, I'll be on my way―― Hisui?" "Yes, what is it, Shiki-sama?" Hisui looks at me directly. ---Why is it? Being stared at by those pure eyes, I get this uncomfortable feeling, like I was very dirty. "―― It's nothing. Just be careful at home." With a deep uneasiness in my chest, I leave the mansion. ---It's lunch time. As usual, Arihiko is skipping school. "―― I'll go eat at the cafeteria." If I eat by myself, I'll just end up being depressed. If I go eat in the cafeteria full of people, it should help me get my mind off of things. As expected, the cafeteria is packed. After waiting in a long line, I buy the tried and true meal set A and walk to a table. The students' voices are pretty loud, so I am able to concentrate on just eating my meal. I use my fork and eat in silence. And then. For a moment, I see a terrible image. "―― The television screen――" I gape at the large television mounted on the wall at the end of the cafeteria. At my school, they record the morning news and replay it at lunch. My eyes fixate on what is playing. "No way―" I watch the news in amazed horror. Shown on the television is the alley that I saw last night in my dream. The newscaster is talking. On the screen, the words "Vampire Serial Killer's Ninth Victim" appear in bloody lettering. After that, the face of the victim appears. The woman with the long hair, she― definitely was the one I killed in my dream. "--" I start to feel faint. "How―― come?" That was a dream. It had to be a dream. But in reality, the same person as in my dream, in the same place as my dream, was killed in the same way as my dream. "The vampire should be gone already." I killed Yumizuka with my own hands. Those killings, they shouldn't be happening anymore. "Ikilled?" Yes, I killed. Just like the time I killed Yumizuka. While breathing hard, last night, that woman I've never met--- Didn't I tell you, Shiki-kun? It's useless to resist it. "Uu---" Quashing the urge to throw up my lunch, I stagger out of my seat. I can't go back to class. I somehow find myself running into town. ---I come to the place I saw in my dream. There are several policemen around the area, and tape reading "Police Line Do Not Cross" is stretched across the alley. "---Exactly the same." Without a doubt, this is the place I went to in my dream. ---No, that's not a dream. I can't delude myself into thinking it is a dream any longer. "――――" Even if I stay here longer, the cops will only stare at me. ―― I can't go back to school now. I guess I'll go back to the mansion. Since it's not even two o'clock yet, Hisui isn't waiting in the lobby. "―――――" I can say I got lucky. I don't feel like seeing anyone right now. *sigh* Letting out a deep breath, I collapse onto my bed. ―― I just don't understand any of this at all. I have dreams where I kill people. In reality, the same killing has happened. I am living today like living a normal life. I was taking delight in killing people in my dreams. --Just which one― is the real Tohno Shiki? Do you really have to ask? ―― That voice again. C'mon, let's continue, Shiki. ―― That voice that echoes inside my head. My voice. Night comes every day. For sure, we'll find the one we want someday, right――? "Shut up--!" I leap out of bed. I start to pant heavily. My breathing is out of control. Just now― I wanted Akiha. "Damn itwhat in the world―" I don't understand what's happening to me. All I know for sure, is that if I see Akiha or Hisui right now, I don't know what I'll do to them.

*s394
---It's lunch time. As usual, Arihiko is skipping school. "―― I'll go eat at the cafeteria." If I eat by myself, I'll just end up being depressed. If I go eat in the cafeteria full of people, it should help me get my mind off of things. As expected, the cafeteria is packed. After waiting in a long line, I buy the tried and true meal set A and walk to a table. The students' voices are pretty loud, so I am able to concentrate on just eating my meal. I use my fork and eat in silence. And then. For a moment, I see a terrible image. "――? Is it the television screen?" I gape at the large television mounted on the wall at the end of the cafeteria. At my school, they record the morning news and replay it at lunch. I just stare dumbfounded at the news broadcast that is several hours late. "No way―" I watch the news in amazed horror. Shown in the television is the alley that I saw last night in my dream. The newscaster is talking. On the screen, the words "Vampire Serial Killer's Ninth Victim" appears in bloody lettering. After that, the face of the victim appears. The woman with the long hair, she was definitely the one I killed in my dream. "--" Suddenly, I start to feel faint. "How―― come?" That was a dream. It had to be a dream. But in reality, the same person as in my dream, in the same place as my dream, is killed in the same way as my dream. "The vampire should be gone already." I killed Yumizuka with my own hands. Those killings, they shouldn't be happening anymore. "I---killed?" Yes, I killed. Just like the time I killed Yumizuka. While breathing hard, last night, that woman I've never met--- Didn't I tell you, Shiki-kun? It's useless to resist it. "Uu---" Quashing the urge to throw up my lunch, I stagger out of my seat. I can't go back to class. I somehow find myself running into town. ---I come to the place I saw in my dream. There are several policemen around the area, and tape reading "Police Line Do Not Cross" is stretched across the alley. "---Exactly the same." Without a doubt, this is the place I went to in my dream. ---No, that's not a dream. I can't delude myself into thinking it is a dream any longer. "―――" Even if I stay here longer, the cops will only stare at me. ―― I can't go back to school now. I guess I'll go back to the mansion. Since it's not even two o'clock yet, Hisui isn't waiting in the lobby. "―――――" I can say I got lucky. I don't feel like seeing anyone right now. *sigh* Giving a deep breath, I collapse onto my bed. ―― I just don't understand any of this at all. I have dreams where I kill people. In reality, the same killing has happened. I am living today like living a normal life. I was taking delight in killing people in my dreams. ---Just which one? Which is the real Tohno Shiki? Do you really have to ask? ―― That voice again. C'mon, let's continue, Shiki. ―― That voice that echoes inside my head. My voice. Night comes every day. For sure, we'll find the one we want someday, right―? "Shut up!" I leap out of bed. *pant* *pant* *pant* I breathe wildly. Just now, I was lusting after Akiha. *pant* *pant* ―― I feel like I'm going to vomit. I don't ever think about these things normally, but when I try to sleep, these weird thoughts pop up in my head. It's almost as if there's someone else inside my brain. "――― Ah." Come to think of it, Akiha said something like that earlier. That was about---my old man would have extreme personality shifts―― it sounds almost like me right now. ―― Of course, like father, like son. It might even be hereditary. "My old man's room― I think they still keep it like before―"

*s395
My old man's room is just like it always was. Nearly all of the rows of books are educational reports, and nothing catches my attention. What I want right now is my old man's journal or notes. The old man was extremely methodical. There certainly has to be something like that lying around here somewhere--- "―― Of course, they're not just lying about where anyone can see them." Maybe they're locked away somewhere. I should probably look in these desk drawers first. Using a letter opener lying on the desk, I cut the "line" of the drawer lock. Inside, there appears to be some old documents bundled together and what seems to be a journal. First, I'll look at the old documents. "―― This is― my family tree?" Definitely. Right after Tohno MAKIHISA is written Tohno SHIKI and Tohno AKIHA. "Huh―― my old man, he adopted a son ten years ago? ―― Ah, but he passed away shortly thereafter." Ten years ago; that would be when I was just in elementary school. That long ago, it's only natural I wouldn't remember. "But, the heads of the household have had pretty short lifespans. My old man died before he was fifty, and before that, before thirty in an accident―― Wow, before that, eighteen years of age, suicide―!?" No, wait a second. No matter how you look at it, this is strange. Looking through the family tree, all members of the Tohno household have died strangely. Madness. Accidents. Murder. Disappearances. Stillbirth. ―― Not one of them lived a long life or even died peacefully. "Wha――――" This entire document is filled with horrible fates. Even worse, most of the causes of death are madness. Most of them ended up taking their own lives. "That's strange---it's just strange." But I can't exactly tell what's strange about it. "―― Next is―― my old man's journal." I pick up the journal, which has a relatively new binding. Thump. My heart starts to pound. My heart seems to understand that I shouldn't be opening this. But I can't turn back now. Swallowing hard, I open my old man's journal. --There is a demon lurking inside the Tohno bloodline. The opening statement is in those lines. And that isn't just a simple metaphor. The ancestors of the Tohno were a mixed breed of "something nonhuman" and human. We, being their descendants, also have this element of "something nonhuman" in our blood. In regards to our blood― There are those with strong and those with weak nonhuman blood. Those with weak nonhuman blood can live their lives as ordinary people, but those with strong nonhuman blood can never live a normal life. Those with strong Tohno blood are born with special powers. It could be a body that is resistant to death, it could be an ability to move things without touching them, or it could be fangs used to take bodily fluids from other people. This blood. When this blood becomes too strong, the members of the Tohno House start to gradually lose their sanity. And the majority of the members of the Tohno House that lose their sanity become demons that feed on human flesh. So, the head of the Tohno household carries the responsibility of punishing those who have turned into such monsters. "Ha." ―― It's messed up. My old man, what was he trying to say? Writing so seriously about something that's more like a fairy tale. The journal turns more into the old man's rant. The date is roughly nine years ago. The handwriting starts to get erratic. ―― I am no longer able to suppress my raging blood. I was able to obtain an orphan from a family of Synchronizers, so this should help me strengthen my mind. However, it really is only a matter of time before I go insane. ―― It is terrifying. When I come to, I find that I can't even remember half of the day. During that time, I'm forcing my inversion impulse on that child. If this keeps up, it is only a matter of time before I completely lose my sanity and turn into a beast. I don't even know how much time I have left to remain as myself. No. If that child is here, then I can probably last for a few more years. But that child will not be able to bear that. After that child breaks, I will have to take my own life. But until then---I must protect my children. Akiha's blood is weak. Unless she wishes it herself, she does not have to suffer the same fate. The real problem is SHIKI. That child is incredibly close to me. More than anything, I do not want that child to suffer my fate. ―― If the Tohno blood is unnatural, I need to distance him as much as possible from the Tohno name and see how he will fare- "-" I finish reading in a state of horror and amazement. The contents of my old man's journal are so far away from reality that it's outright bizarre. My old man didn't just have manic-depression. Rather, he just became violent without his knowing. Just like Tohno Shiki right now. "―― No." That's wrong. That old man isn't like me. I'm like him. Fearing that, he sent me from the mansion. But now I've returned, and my sleeping blood has awoken. "Heh―― nonsense, all of this." I try to laugh but find myself unable to laugh it off. The Tohno blood is mixed with the blood of something nonhuman. Those of the Tohno blood have special powers. ―― I can't laugh it off. Supernatural power. I've been carrying that for eight years. Being able to perceive the death of things, my unnatural eyes. "G―――――――――" --I feel like vomiting. I can't stay standing up. Hurry. I must hurry back to my room and sleep; it feels like there is something wrong with my head. "Shiki-sama, you have returned already?" ―― I can hear a voice that sounds like Hisui. "Shiki-sama, please excuse me." ―― Hisui enters my room. "Please forgive me. I did not realize that you had returned, so I was unable to greet you at the door." "―― Don't worry about it. I came early on my own. Hisui, can you leave me alone? I just don't feel like talking to anyone." "Shiki-sama, are you feeling sick―?" "---I don't know. I don't understand it myself." "―――――――" Hisui looks at me with worried eyes. ―― Damn it, what am I doing? Hisui is worrying about me; there's no reason to take it out on her――! "―― Sorry, I just feel a bit bad. I want to sleep until dinner; is there some medicine I can take? Headache medicine would be the best." "Yes, I will go get some." "Thank you for waiting. Please drink this." "Thank you, as always, and sorry." I take the water and the powdered medicine that Hisui brought me. For some reason, there are two kinds of medicine. "Huh? Two? What are they?" "Yes, I told my sister that you were not feeling well, and she gave me some medicine she had prescribed from your doctor. This one is to help you sleep. This contains benzodiazepine, which is known for being able to produce a relaxed sleep." "――――?" I trust Kohaku-san, but she doesn't have to tell Hisui all this in-depth knowledge― "―― Wow, does Kohaku-san plan on becoming a licensed pharmacist?" Saying that, I drink the medicine. I drink the water to gulp down my medicine. Apparently, it works fast; I feel sleepy already. "―― I'm going to sleep. Please wake me when it's dinner time." "I understand. Well then, excuse me." Hisui leaves. My consciousness starts to fade. ―― I'll sleep just a little bit. It's still bright outside. Because it's during the day, I shouldn't see any of those horrible dreams--- "Please excuse me. Good night, Shiki-sama." With a bow, Hisui exits the room. I yawn heavily. ―― I'm still just a little sleepy. Kohaku-san's medicine was pretty strong, so I spent most of dinner in a daze. It's only about nine o'clock. I took a nap already, so it's a little early to be sleeping. At ten o'clock, the lights in the mansion are turned off. "―― Well then, what should I do?" I say this calmly, but I really have no idea what I should do. ―― Just what are the dreams that I keep seeing? Am I just like my father, who does things unconsciously, and did I really kill anyone? ―― No, there's something not right about this interpretation. If I left the mansion and walked the streets, Kohaku-san and Hisui would definitely notice something. I can't explain the fact that I wake up in my bed clean when there's so much blood splattered on me. "――― There's only one way to know for sure." Yes, if I want to prove everything---

*s396
I start to breathe heavily. ―― I won't move. Right now, if anything― If anything moves right now---I'd be admitting I'm insane, and it's scaring me. My brain might have gone numb. If I stay like this---I am thinking stupidly that the storm will be over My whole world starts to flicker. Just like a police car's siren, everything revolves, red and black. "Ah---" My   head    hurts. "I'm tired---I'm just tired, that's all." I say   so    to myself. I collapse   onto the bed. "Shiki-sama, have you returned?" ―― A voice like Hisui's wakes me up. "Shiki-sama, please excuse me." ―― Someone enters my room. But, it hurts so much. I can't make out who it is. "Please forgive me. I did not realize that you had returned, so I was unable to greet you at the door." "―― No, that's, fine---leave me alone, please." "Shiki-sama, are you feeling sick?" "---Ah. I don't really―" ―― know. I can't finish my sentence. "―― Sorry. I feelbad. I want, to, sleep, is there, any, medicine?" "Yes, I will go get some." "Thank you for waiting. Please drink this." "Thank you, as always, and sorry." With eyes that can't quite see too well, I take the water and the powdered medicine Hisui brought me. For some reason, there are two kinds of medicine. ―― I don't care, so I put both of them in my mouth and drink the water. Apparently, it works fast; I start to feel sleepy already. "―― I'm going to sleep. Until tomorrow" "Don't worry, no one's going to bother you, Shiki-sama." Hisui giggles and I sense her walking away. My consciousness starts to swim. ---I'll go to sleep. My head hurts so much right now---I don't even care if I see those bad dreams or not. ---I am in the night-shrouded town. I got here somehow. Is this a dream? If so, why am I here? "---" No, the reason is clear. I'm out on the streets in the middle of the night because of the killer---in order to look for the killer and find the killer. I wander around aimlessly. I wonder how late it is? ―― I don't see anyone suspicious. ―― There's no point in coming here. ―― I don't see any sign of the killer. "-" ―― My legs become heavy. Somehow, everything feels unreal. The atmosphere is getting weaker. Time is degrading. My sense of people around me becomes dreadfully surreal. ―― But the sense of smell feels real. The odor that tugs at my nostrils. It's floating from over there. That was the final stop. Just like my dream from last night, a dead body of someone I don't know is there in the back alley. It's a woman. Her face is scraped from her chin to her nose, and I can't tell now if she is beautiful or not. The flowing blood is incredibly sticky, and it reminds me more of red jelly than liquid. From her body, her internal organs bloom out like the legs of an octopus. The pink mass of dead organs shines and looks warm. In front of that corpse, a black, truly black figure is crouched and seems to be crying. ""---Who are you!?"" Our voices overlap each other. I ask him who he is, and he asks me who I am and turns. ""I am"" "A killer." ―― But which one of us said that? Well, after all, this is a dream. So I play around a bit, and with a small amount of hope, I say that I am the killer. "Eh-?" The dark figure tilts his head, puzzled. The man crouching in front of the dead body looks at me, as if trying to compare the two of us. During that moment, in that emptiness, I get certain. "Heh." A laugh escapes my throat. This man is a fake. The puzzled figure in front of the corpse, and myself not feeling anything. If you ask which one of us is more like a killer, the answer is simple. "―― Is it you?" The man says with trembling voice. I stifle my laugh and naturally, as if I'm shaking his hand, stick my knife into his chest. -Eh? A voice shows his surprise. Even though he's about to get killed, he is sluggish enough not to move. It makes me sick that this guy was calling himself a killer like that. I vomit as I slice him. Like a paper doll, he crumbles to pieces. Like a pouring bucket full of water, his blood paints my body crimson from head to toe. Drip drip, drip drip. His blood drips from my hair. I let out a deep breath. Before my eyes is yet another dead body. In my hands is my steaming knife. The killer is dead, and the town is now safe like before. ---But that still leaves me. Even if the town returns to normal, I still remain affected. The killer still exists. "―――― Let's go home." Yes, I should go home. Affected as I am, I should go back to the mansion. Nothing has changed. I'll live normally as Tohno Shiki, and continue the nightmare at night. ---Really, nothing at all. It's just a matter that instead of dream becoming a reality, it's just that I won't wake up from my dream anymore. I think I heard the faint chuckle of a small girl. That's just a trivial matter, though. I have to go to sleep, and wait for my dream to continue again tomorrow night

*s397
---I'll walk around the night-shrouded town and find the serial killer. Then, I can prove that my dreams were just dreams. Because if I find the killer― ―― Then all the incidents must be the work of that killer. "――― Alright." For safety's sake, I put my knife in my pocket and start my investigation. -I go out into the night-shrouded town. There isn't exactly a way to search for the serial killer. The only thing I can do is wander the streets and look for anything suspicious---or I use myself as a decoy to bring out the killer. "――――――" After what happened with Yumizuka, maybe I've become numb to danger. Since the serial killer is just a human, I can roam the streets without any nervousness. I wander around aimlessly. The time is about eleven at night. ―― I don't see anything suspicious. The clock has by now gone past midnight. ―― There's no use coming here. ―― Damn it. I don't see anyone that looks like a killer. *pant*―― *pant*―― *pant*―― *pant* --I'm starting to get really annoyed. Why can't I find anyone like that? That's not the person. That's not the person. That's not the person. Unable to stand it, I put my hand in my pocket, gripping my knife. That's not the person. That's not the person. That's not the person. That's not the person. That's not the person. That's not the person. That's not the person "-Eh?" For a brief instant, I see the face of a man with bloodshot eyes. ―― It's nothing. It is merely my reflection off of a show window. "" How-stupid. Gripping my knife. Breathing out of control. Unconsciously acting exactly like the killer in my dreams. "No--!" No. I didn't want to do these kinds of things. "Damn it―― What am I doing――――!?" ―― Seriously, what am I doing? If I didn't recognize my face like that, I would---I would really, take anyone and― Tell myself it is the killer and would have killed anyone. "Tsk-" I start to run. I can't stay here. I won't find out anything this way. I---there's something wrong with me--- I breathe heavily. I reach my room as if running away, and I collapse onto my bed. "Da――!" In the end, I didn't solve anything. ―― I start to get sleepy. All I can do is is try to sleep deeply so that I won't dream at all. *pant*---*pant**pant* I feel like I am being watched. I. With bloodshot eyes, I look at the people walking down the streets. ---Maybe it's because of the time? Compared to last night, there's hardly anyone around. ―― Someone is watching me. I can't find what I'm looking for. Again. Tonight, I can't find the person I'm looking for. I'm starting to get annoyed. I pant heavily. I should change my spot. I'm going to stop looking in town. I go from roof to roof and end up somewhere crowded. ―― Looking from the roof of the highest house, I scan the streets. Don't look! "There." I see a person walking alone. A woman. This time, there can be no mistake― It'll be great if it's Akiha. Don't look at me. No, it really doesn't matter. Once more. Once more, I want to taste that wonderful sensation I kill her from behind, taking care not to damage her body. Holding her long hair, I drag Akiha's body. *pant**pant**pant* Biting into Akiha's neck, I suck her blood. ---Boring. This is nowhere near as exciting as last night. If her hair is this short, it's not Akiha at all. "―― Boring――!" I start to get pissed off. Even though I slice the body into pieces, I'm still mad. Impostor. This impostor pisses me off. Stop watching me! *pant**pant**pant* I've used up extra energy. Soon, dawn will arrive. Once it becomes morning, Shiki will awaken. "I'm tired tonight. I'll start again, tomorrow." Yeah, that'll do. That's what I'll do. Now then. Before the morning comes, before any one realizes, I must go back to school

*s398
---If I don't sleep tonight, it'll be fine. "―― That's right. If I don't sleep, and if--" If there is another victim tomorrow, then for sure, I won't have had anything to do with it. "Alright." I do understand this is a bit off course. I know it's a bit strange staying here and not sleeping, waiting for someone I do not know to be killed. "---But, what else can I do?" Since I---my memory is not to be trusted, there is no other way to do this. ---Anyway. There is no other way for me to do this than to stay in my room without dreaming and wait until morning. -Time passes. I still manage to stay awake. Another hour. I still manage to stay awake. -An hour. I still, manage― to stay awake. It is now past one o'clock in the morning. I― still manage   to stay    awake. In just four hours, it will be morning. ―― Something is wrong. I am― still conscious― but― ―― My field of vision collapses. I must stay up. I am not sleepy yet, but― Why? Why? Why? Why does my   body   want   to sleep   this much-? *pant*---*pant**pant* I feel like I am being watched. I. With bloodshot eyes, I look at the people walking down the streets. ---Maybe it's because of the time? Compared to last night, there's hardly anyone around. ―― Someone is watching me. I can't find what I'm looking for. Again. Tonight, I can't find the person I'm looking for. I'm starting to get annoyed. I pant heavily. I should change my spot. I'm going to stop looking in town. I go from roof to roof and end up somewhere crowded. ―― Looking from the roof of the highest house, I scan the streets. Don't look! "There." I see a person walking alone. A woman. This time, there can be no mistake― It'll be great if it's Akiha. Don't look at me. No, it really doesn't matter. Once more. Once more, I want to taste that wonderful sensation I kill her from behind, taking care not to damage her body. Holding her long hair, I drag Akiha's body. *pant**pant**pant* Biting into Akiha's neck, I suck her blood. ---Boring. This is nowhere near as exciting as last night. If her hair is this short, it's not Akiha at all. "―― Boring――!" I start to get pissed off. Even though I slice the body into pieces, I'm still mad. Impostor. This impostor pisses me off. Stop watching me! *pant**pant**pant* I've used up extra energy. Soon, dawn will arrive. Once it becomes morning, Shiki will awaken. "I'm tired tonight. I'll start again, tomorrow." Yeah, that'll do. That's what I'll do. Now then. Before the morning comes, before any one realizes, I must go back to school

*s399
I cannot wake up. Immersed in a dark dream, I can't wake up. ---I feel a chill go down my spine. Without reason, without purpose. I realize I will never be able to wake from this dream. "Shiki-sama, please wake up. You will be late for school." "-Eh?" Hisui is in front of me. This is my room, and there is surprisingly great weather outside. "Hi―― sui?" "Good morning, Shiki-sama. You do not have as much time today, so please hurry to the sitting room." As usual, Hisui speaks in her detached tone. "Oh--h." With that, everything disappeared. I embrace my recently awakened but still throbbing body. ―― I feel relieved. The awful world I was in until just now has just turned into a dream. "―― Thanks. If you hadn't woken me up, I might have never woken up." "Shiki-sama――? If you are not feeling well, please tell me so." "No, that's not it. ---Morning, Hisui. I'm glad that you're here." "Ehah, thank you very much, Shiki-sama." She blushes slightly and lowers her head. "No, I'm the one who should be saying thank-it's past seven-thirty already!? Sorry, I'll get up, so please go wait in the sitting room!" "Yes, I will be waiting." Right as Hisui leaves the room, I change into my school uniform. Jumping out of bed, I scarf down a little of the breakfast Kohaku-san made and leave the mansion. It all took me less than ten minutes. "I'm leaving--see you later, Hisui!" "Yes, I will be awaiting your return." "―― I made it――" I breathe out and rest my body. I made it just in time before they closed the gate, but I still have to make it to class. "―― Whew." The teacher hasn't arrived in the classroom yet. I try to catch my breath as I sit down. ―― The classroom seems more lively today than usual. Tomorrow is a holiday, so everyone probably feels like today is a Saturday. School ends. Since I don't have any reason to stay at school, I'll head back to the mansion. "―― Yesterday's dream." This is definitely the place where I saw someone get killed in my dream. Even though I tried as hard as I could not to dream, I guess you can't run away from yourself. "-Kk." I grind my teeth. I feel pitiful about my weakness. After all, it's all a dream. Certainly there is something wrong with me seeing those dreams, but I think I'm still sane. ―― My old man is my old man. I don't know about the Tohno blood. But I don't want to become a burden on Akiha and the others while I'm sane. I have to try and act as normally as possible, and try to find a way to solve all of this--- "Welcome back, Shiki-sama." As soon as I open the door, Hisui politely greets me. "I'm back. I'll be in my room, so it's okay if you return to whatever you were doing." "Thank you. I will return to cleaning the sitting room. If you need anything, please call for me." "―― Hisui is cleaning the sitting room―" I don't see Kohaku-san, but she's probably sweeping the rear courtyard or going out to get groceries. It appears Akiha hasn't come back yet, so I'll go back to my room. Putting away my bag, I change out of my uniform. I spend about an hour just sitting around my room. All of a sudden, I hear a gurgling noise. It's not a strange noise or anything. It's just the sound of my stomach. "―― That's right, I didn't really have a chance to eat since this morning." Not wanting to be late this morning, I was only able to eat just a little of what Kohaku-san made for breakfast. I thought about eating at the cafeteria, but I lost my appetite as soon as I remembered what I saw at the cafeteria yesterday. "―― I wonder if I can get something to snack on before dinner――" ―― I really don't want to be a bother, but I'm really starving. I should---

*s400
―― It is a little selfish, but I'd better ask Kohaku-san to make me something to eat. "Ah, Shiki-san. You're back." Moving the broom off to one side, Kohaku-san bows. "Yeah, I'm back. I do have a little favor to ask, though." "Yes? Is there something special you need?" "Um, I'm a little embarrassed, but―" Before I could even ask her nicely to make me something to eat, the growling of my stomach rumbles through the courtyard. "--" Surprised, Kohaku-san just gapes. "-Uh." My face turns red― I didn't realize my body was that crass― "―― Um, so that's it. I didn't have much to eat since morning, so I can't wait until dinner―" "--" Kohaku-san stares at me wordlessly and then, as if remembering, lets out a little laugh. "I understand. So you want me to fix you something light? Shiki-san, is there something you want in particular?" "Something I want?" ―― To be honest, I was just hungry, and I didn't even think about what I wanted to eat. "Um―― I guess some pancakes would be fine." I don't know why, but the image of golden pancakes just pops into my head. "Pancakes――? Shiki-san, I've heard that you do not like sweets, but―" Kohaku-san tilts her head in surprise. "Ah---no, I don't eat a lot of sugar, but it's not like I don't like it― I did eat lots of Japanese candy at the Arima's too―" "Really!? If that was the case, you should have told me earlier. I was wondering all this time if I should get you something during teatime. But from now on, I'll make you the same thing that I make Akiha-sama." Kohaku-san's voice suddenly brightens. ―― But eating the same thing as Akiha, does she mean I'll be eating those dainty little shortcakes from now on―? "But, Shiki-san, why do you want pancakes? If you want, I can fix you something a little better." "Hm―― no reason, I guess. I like them because they are pretty simple." "Ahaha, Shiki-san, you just said the same thing as Hisui-chan. This is a secret, but I think Hisui-chan really likes pancakes, too. Whenever she tries to cook something, it's almost always pancakes." "Really? ―― That's pretty surprising. I thought she would like something a little more complex." Like, a very decorated cake that makes you wonder where to cut it from. "Isn't it? I think it is a little strange too, so I asked her. She told me it's because I told her that they are very simple to make. But she says she still can't make it to satisfy her―" "―――――?" ―― Um, so it's not that she likes pancakes, but just that she practices making them? "Ah, sorry Shiki-san. I will go make you some, so please wait in the sitting room." With her broom in hand, Kohaku-san hurries toward the rear entrance. "-Well, whatever." In any case, I'll get to eat soon. I'll be able to have some tea and pancakes and then get to rest until dinner

*s401
―― Although I think she'll refuse, I wonder what will happen if I ask Hisui. "―― Hisui's in the sitting room." I'm a little excited. I should hurry over and go ask Hisui. "I refuse." Not even a second after I ask― With an incredible counterpunch, she totally knocks out my plan. "I―― I see. You are a little busy." Defeated, I slump like a captured soldier. "Sorry. Please continue what you were doing." I slowly start to shuffle my way to the lobby. "Ah―― Please wait, Shiki-sama. Um― it is not that I would not like to make you something, but――" "Eh―――?" I turn around without even thinking. Then--- Hisui looks incredibly cute for some reason. "I, I just thought that since you are used to Nee-san's cooking, my cooking would not even come close―" Fidgeting, Hisui continues speaking uneasily. "So I want for you to eat my food when my skill has improved―" "---" Wh―― what an amazing thing she says! That "I refuse" back then was a big shock, but compared to what she just said, it's merely a light jab. "What are you saying, Hisui? I'll eat anything you make, so please don't fret about that sort of thing." "―――― No, I cannot do that. Shiki-sama, please ask Nee-san about food." "―― No, what I really want is something from you. If I wanted Kohaku-san's cooking, I'd have gone to her first. I came here to ask you---cause I wanted your cooking." Hisui just looks at me, not responding. "―――― Hm." If that's how she's going to be, then I'll just stay right here in the sitting room until she says she'll make me something. "――" "―――" "――――" "―――――" "――――――" "―――――――" "――――――――" "―――――――――" "――――――――――" "―――――――――――" We continue staring at each other without saying anything. ―― That's odd. How did we end up like this? "―― I understand. If you do not mind, then I will make something." "---! Yes! For real, Hisui!?" "Yes. But since you insisted, you are bringing this on yourself." "Eh―――?" Saying something incredibly ominous, Hisui heads towards the kitchen. "--He. Hehe, hehehehehe." I start chuckling uncontrollably. In the kitchen behind that wall, Hisui is making food for my sake. Thinking about it, I can't help but smile. Even though Kohaku-san prepares food everyday, she does so too professionally; it feels like some other cook is making the food. On the other hand, I have never seen Hisui's cooking, so I'm pretty excited. "―― Kohaku-san did say that Hisui was poor at cooking though――" Well, even so, I don't think anything inedible will be the result. If you have a normal sense of taste, it's impossible to make something that is completely inedible. ―― ――― ―――― ――――― ―――――― ――――――― But still. Doesn't she seem to be taking a little too long? "Kya--!?" ---And then, I hear a gigantic crash coming from the kitchen. "Hisui!?" "What happened, Hisui!?" I run into the kitchen. "Ah." After entering, I'm a little taken aback. Hisui might have been planning on cooking a feast as ingredients are stacked all about the kitchen. A kitchen knife is thrust into the cutting board like a gravestone or like that holy sword from somewhere. And on the stove, black smoke billows from a frying pan. "Um―― Hisui?" "――――――――" Hisui embarrassedly hangs her head. "Um, Hisui. I would have been happy with something light. Something simple, like a pancake." "―― Shiki-sama, you may say that, but a pancake is not very simple." Hisui says so from the bottom of her heart. ―― Geez. Hisui really IS pretty poor at cooking--- "Hisui, let me see your hand." "Eh―― My hand?" Hisui reluctantly shows me her hand. "Just as I thought. You cut yourself, didn't you?" "―― Yes. Forgive me, I was not even able to fix you anything properly, and now I have shown you this pathetic sight." "Don't be stupid, that's not what I'm trying to say. If you cut yourself, you shouldn't force---" She shouldn't force herself, she should treat her wounds. "―― Shiki-sama?" Hisui's white finger is painted a deep red. Her fingertip, wet with the color red. "---This is bad. That's pretty deep." Saying that, I take her arm. "!" Hisui's body flinches noticeably. I don't even notice. The only thing I care about right now is treating her cut. "Ah" Hisui's voice. ---I don't even hear it. Just like back when I was a kid, I place the finger in my mouth and lick the blood. "――― Shiki--sama." ---Her slender finger. Red blood does not suit her white finger at all. So I only thought to make her finger clean again. "―― Please stop, Shiki― sama――" ---Why is it? Hisui's blood is extremely--- "―――― Ah." -sweet. Her blood is sweet, and just from doing this, my body starts to feel hot and--- "―――――――" ---I can't hear her voice. Looking up, I see Hisui's face. Blushing cheeks. Deep blue eyes. ―― Years ago, the red hair that was so close to me. "-!" I pull back from Hisui. What― what was I doing just now--- Hisui just hangs her head, not moving. "―――― Ah." I---even though Hisui hates to be in contact with men, I licked her fingerand I sucked her blood for a long time. "―― I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that---" I really shouldn't have done that. It's not just in a dream anymore, is it? Enjoying sucking someone's blood, it's not just in my dreams--- "―― All you were doing was taking care of my wound. There is no need to apologize." "---No, I---" ---I can't do it. I can't look at her face. The taste of her blood still lingers in my mouth. I can't forget the feeling of her finger. "---I'm sorry. I know I asked for it myself, but I'll be just fine without any food. I'm going back to my room---let me be by myself." Hisui doesn't say anything. Escaping from her wordless stare, I flee to my room.

*s402 [WARNING: H]
After dinner is over, I head to the sitting room to have some tea. ―― Not that I'm in the mood to elegantly drink tea, but I can't exactly refuse Akiha and Kohaku-san's invitation. While drinking the tea that Kohaku-san made, I listen to the conversation between the two. "By the way, Nii-san, about the end of this year―" And, Akiha suddenly directs the conversation toward me. "The end of the year? Aren't you thinking about it a little early? It's only October." "What are you saying? Pretty soon it will be November, and once it becomes December, it'll be time for winter vacation already. It makes sense to plan this early." "―― Well, I guess you're right. What do you all plan to do? I usually just do the same old thing for New Year's---" "Yes, I've heard from Mrs. Arima that whenever you have a long holiday, you spend it at your friend's house." Akiha stares at me as if she wants to say something. ―― Uh, how does Akiha know about all these things? "―― What's wrong with that? Holidays are meant to be spent however you want, and I'm not being a burden to you all, so leave me alone." "Oh my, Shiki-san, you're not going to take a trip?" "―― Now look. I'm only a student, so I don't have any money for a trip. Well, I do want to get a part-time job but---" "Nii-san. You would know what would happen if the eldest son of the Tohno household goes out for a part-time job, right?" "Kohaku-san, I can't have fun like a high schooler with this evil teacher." "Well, I suppose that can't be helped. But Shiki-san, you really don't want to go on a trip? I already made reservations for Akiha-sama, you, Hisui-chan, and myself." "Eh---reservations? Where―?" "The hotel where we take our winter trip. Since you prefer Japanese things, we decided to keep our trip within the country, right, Akiha-sama?" "Y, you're the one that said it, Kohaku. I just approved it." "Hmph," Akiha looks away. "Yes, of course it was. So, please leave your schedule open for the end of the year, Shiki-san. Hisui-chan told me that if you go, she will go too. Do you understand? This would be the first time ever for Hisui-chan to go on a trip. She's always staying at the mansion, and never goes out." "――――――" ―― Um, it's a problem for you to say such things all of a sudden. Well, taking a trip as a family― I haven't actually done that before, so--- "Wh, what is it, Nii-san? I, I won't force you, so if you have other plans, please just let us know." "No, I'll come along. If I refuse your invitation, who knows what you'll do to me?" "I have been saying this isn't my idea――! I don't really―― care either way." "Yeah, of course not. ―― Anyways, thanks. ―― Going on a trip with everyone actually does sound fun." "―― You don't have to thank me. It's only natural for a family to go on a trip together." Akiha sniffs and turns her head. Now that the main conversation ends, tea time ends quietly. It's time to sleep. ―― Thanks to the discussion in the sitting room, I actually feel more relaxed right now. "―― End of the year trip, huh." I can't imagine what the trip will be like, but there's no doubt that it will be fun. "--Phew." Taking a deep breath, I jump into bed. At least for tonight― I wish to not see that dream as I close my eyes. ―― I'm in a dark place. It must be cloudy. There's no moonlight tonight, and I can't see anything. --*pant**pant*-*pant*--- My breath echoes in the air. I'm not killing anyone tonight. Instead, I'm breaking a doll. --*pant**pant*-*pant*--- I grab the arm. I don't care if it comes off so I hold nothing back. I pull the body and continue to violate the doll. --*pant**pant*-*pant*-- I've gotten tired of this. This person doesn't do anything. It doesn't even scream, so I don't feel anything. I violate it just to slake my lust. ―― The wind blows. The clouds shift slightly. The nighttime classroom. There, a beautiful doll exists. --*pant**pant*-*pant*--- The doll doesn't say anything. It doesn't even move by itself. Even when hard meat is put in between its legs, it doesn't move. ---With something like this, I can't get excited. No matter how beautiful it is, a doll can't ever be a fitting companion. --*pant**pant*-*pant*--- But, her feeling is exceptional. No matter how many times I violate it, I never get bored of its body. The body shakes as I move it. The doll's eyes are not looking at me. The empty eyes are just reflecting the moon, I suppose. --This piece of trash starts to piss me off. "---Very soon―" The brows on the doll twitch a little. "---Soon, I'll kill." Redness starts to enter the frozen face. "---Soon, I will return." I'll kill you and  I  will   take your place. "---If that happens, you'll be useless." Haha, that's funny. --*pant*--*pant*---*pant*-- My breathing gets wilder. "Ha-haha, hahahaha, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!" My laughter echoes throughout the room. As if my head became like one of those wood puppets, it bobs up and down uncontrollably. I laugh, and laugh, and laugh. As I laugh, I continue to violate this young girl, that is either Hisui or Kohaku. "--" I wake up and see it is past ten o'clock. "―― That's right, today's a holiday." I lift my body from bed. Unable to contain it, I go into the hallway in my pajamas. I run to the bathroom and throw up in the sink. "Uughuuhuuk! ah!" I empty the contents of my stomach, but I still feel sick. Last night's dream. In a sense, it's worse than my dreams of being a killer. It's much, much worse. "Hagaa, ah---" In my dreams, I don't just violate Akiha, but even Hisui and Kohaku-san. That dream. Dreaming I violated a girl that looked like Hisui or Kohaku-san all night. "――― Aa―――― ach." Not having anything left to throw up, my convulsions start to diminish. I go out in the lobby and see Hisui taking care of something. She might be doing some rearranging, as I see her carrying a chair towards the lobby. "――――― Ku." I feel dizzy. Right now---I can't bring myself to look at her face. But I can't bear to go back to my room without saying anything. If Hisui tried to wake me up as usual---I think this sickness would have been a bit better. "―― Hisui." Hisui realizes I'm here and quietly walks over to me. "Good morning, Shiki-sama." "―― Ah, morning. Sorry for waking up at a selfish time." "I apologize as well. I should have been there when you awoke. Please forgive me." Hisui silently bows her head. ―― Hisui's expressionless face. Remembering last night's dream, I start to feel guilty. "―― No, there's no need for you to apologize. I didn't wake up at the usual time, so it's my fault. It's better if you complain to me a bit." ―― If you do that, I'd feel a little better. "Shiki-sama――?" But, that's just my selfish thoughts. Like right now, my words are making her feel bad. "It's nothing, forget about it. ―― More importantly, I'm kinda' hungry; is breakfast ready?" "―― Nee-san went outside. Your breakfast is ready in the dining room." "Oh. In that case, I'll go have some food. Sorry to bother you while you were working." After saying a quick goodbye, I head towards the dining room. I go back to my room, but I don't really have anything to do here. I've had my fill of sleeping. Thinking about what I should do next, I decide to walk around the mansion. I arrive at the lobby. For some reason, I aimlessly wander around the mansion to confirm my childhood memories. The hallway stretches quite a long distance. When I was a child, I believed that this hallway would go on forever. The mansion seemed as large as a castle, and every day, I would walk a bit around the mansion and would carve my name on the wall, the pillars, or the floor. It was sort of a game I would play with Akiha to see who could take over the mansion. Saying that wherever we put our names became our territory, the two of us walked around the mansion carving our names here and there. "―― Here." On the handrail by the stairs is carved the name SHIKI. It was probably because of these games that my old man forbade us from playing inside the mansion. Anyway, if I look closely, I can see both mine and Akiha's name all over the place. I go outside. ―― Come to think of it, most of the time we spent playing was in the garden. Since Akiha was obedient to the old man, unlike me, she could only play outside for about thirty minutes a day. And still, she usually just stayed behind us, watching and listening. But she would energetically run out with us and compete with us in whatever games we would play. "―― Perhaps her personality stems from those times?" She might have suppressed herself in front of the old man. On the walls of the mansion, the carved names appear again. Shiki, Shiki, Akiha, SHIKI, Akiha, SHIKI, Akiha, Shiki, Shiki, SHIKI, Shiki. The ratios are like that, and the name SHIKI appeared far more times. I suppose Akiha was just a girl so she couldn't keep up with a boy. "Kohaku-san――?" As I come to the backyard, I see Kohaku-san's figure from behind. She hasn't noticed me. I don't know what she's doing, but she disappears into the forest. "?" A bit curious, I follow her from a slight distance. And. Where Kohaku-san headed to, there seems to be a small clearing. "――― There's a clearing there――?" Tilting my head to the side, I try to remember, but for some reason, my memory is a bit vague. In the forest of the mansion, I can see a clearing as if the trees were cut there. ---No, "can see" is not quite right. If you walked by normally, you probably would never notice it. If Kohaku-san didn't walk there, hidden enough by the surrounding trees as it is, I would never have noticed even if I lived here all my life. "―― That's odd. I don't remember a clearing ever being here." To say the least, I don't remember ever playing with Akiha in the clearing. I feel like I've never, been there, before. "――――" After thinking for a bit, I decide to go into the clearing. ―― The clearing doesn't strike me as anything out of the ordinary. There's no sign of Kohaku-san, who entered before me. "What's this---just an empty place." I walk to the middle of the clearing. This clearing really is just an empty space. The perfectly level open ground. The deep woods enclose the area. The voice of the cicadas. And the strong, summer sunshine that feels like it could dissolve-- "Eh――――?" Summer, sunshine---? "Ououch――" The wound on my chest starts to hurt. Like / Stabbing. This pain / that feels like  / a kitchen knife stabbing my chest. Chiiirp. Chirp Chirp. Chiiirp. Chirp Chirp. Chiiirp. Chirp Chirp- From somewhere, I can hear the voice of cicadas. But, it's autumn now. The summer sunshine that bathes everything in white. The columns of summer clouds in the far off sky. I can practically see the voices. At my feet, there are the discarded shells of cicadas. Discarded shell. Someone's--discarded shell. "――――――" My wound opens. My chest becomes painted a dark crimson; black vermillion soaks both my hands- ―― Someone's crouched silhouette. The approaching footsteps of a young girl. The columns of clouds in the far sky. The discarded shells of cicadas. I suddenly realize, in front of me is the crying face of Akiha, drenched in blood. Chiiirp. Chirp Chirp. Chiiirp. Chirp Chirp. ---Ah. Voices which try to pierce my eardrums, voices of the cicadas. "Ah-gu." My chest hurts. I feel sick. My wound healed a long time ago, so why does it hurt so much? My chest  is broken. The old wound opens, blood flows forth from the opening. ---What is this? My wound, it hasn't healed at all. My consciousness sinks. My wound hurts. Right before I pass out, I remember a terrible image. A hot summer day. Akiha stained in blood and myself staring down at her. The silhouette licks the blood off its hands. ―― Then, the silhouette becomes my face as a young boy, laughing with pleasure--- ―― I can hear voices talking. "Akiha-sama, are you not going to call for a doctor?" "Don't be stupid, Hisui. There's no way I could do that, since Nii-san's wound isn't normal――!" ―― Akiha and  Hisui   are talking. This is   SHIKI's room. It looks  like   I am  sleeping  in the bed. I planned to say "Yo!" and get out of bed, but I can't move at all. My chest doesn't hurt anymore, but my body feels as heavy as lead. All I can move are my eyes and mouth. "Just what in the world were you trying to do, Hisui? You know not to let Shiki go near that place――!" "Please―― forgive me." "This can't be solved by apologizing. You were assigned to serve Nii-san to avoid this kind of situation. So what were you doing――!?" Completely different from her usual manner, Akiha gives full vent to her anger. In comparison, Hisui is accepting the scolding, looking down silently. "What about Kohaku? Didn't I give her orders too? Not to let Nii-san out of her sight?" "Nee-san--is not here." "Not here―― what do you mean by that?" Hisui doesn't answer. Akiha grinds her teeth. ---Not here? What is she saying? Kohaku-san was in the rear courtyard right now--- "Akiha-sama. We should stop doing this." "---Hisui." "He is different. He is a different person. This mansion, it is not good for him. So, we should stop doing this." "I don't want to hear those words!" "No, that is why I must say them. You realize it, too. At this rate, Shiki-sama will really become a killer." Just now, what did Hisui say? "―― Are you saying his Tohno blood is awakened in this mansion? That's ridiculous. It's impossible for that to happen to Nii-san." "―― You are right. He is just like us, with Makihisa-sama's choice---" In that instant. Smack! The sound of a cheek being slapped echoes throughout the room. "I've told you that I won't allow anyone to say that." "―――――――" The two become silent. The air between the two of them increases in tension. ―― Hisui stands painfully with her head down. I don't understand why Akiha is so angry, but I don't want to see Hisui in pain any longer. "Ugh." Somehow, I manage to shift my body. "―― Hisui, I leave the rest to you. If Nii-san wakes, take care of what he needs." "Akiha-sama, are you okay with this?" "Yes. If I'm here, Nii-san will just get weaker." Akiha leaves the room with an extremely painful smile on her face. "―――――" Well, what should I do now? Maybe it's better if I just pretend that I haven't woke up yet-- "Shiki-sama, I think it is safe now for you to open your eyes." "―― Oh, you knew, Hisui." "Yes, Akiha-sama did not realize it but―― Ever since a long time ago, she has never been good at being able to see through someone who is acting." Hisui speaks reluctantly. "―― Is that so? But you are pretty perceptive." "―― I do not know. Since I cannot understand the heart of the person I want to know the most about, I do not think I am very perceptive." "I see―" Nodding, I somehow get the feeling she's talking about Kohaku-san. "―― Hisui, you mentioned it earlier, but where did Kohaku-san go?" "―― I am sorry. I, do not know about Nee-san very well." "――――" Something about that response is not right. But what's not right, I can't seem to grasp it right now. As I am doing this right now. My body is sluggish, and it takes all my strength just to talk. "Shiki-sama, are you not pushing yourself?" "―― To tell the truth, I feel extremely sluggish. Just what in the world happened to me?" "―― Shiki-sama, we found you collapsed in the rear courtyard. It did not seem like your normal anemia, so we contacted Akiha-sama and brought you to your room." ―― Collapsed. In the rear courtyard. The white summer sunshine, and the voice of cicadas. "I remember. I was standing, and then I got real dizzy. Geez, I haven't had it this bad since elementary school." "―― I thought that I should call the doctor, but Akiha-sama wanted us to wait and see." "―― Yeah, Akiha's right. This is more like a mental thing, so calling the doctor wouldn't have helped. How long was I out?" "―― I found you after noon, so approximately twelve hours." "Th---that long!?" Surprised, I look at the clock. But, my body doesn't move. "It is now midnight. I will watch over you tonight, so please, if you need anything, do not hesitate to ask." "O―― okay. I appreciate it." ---I was unconscious for half a day, I haven't done that since that accident. Furthermore, after sleeping for so long, my body is still wanting more sleep. "―― I'm sorry. I'm so sleepy――" "Then please go to sleep. I will be in the hallway, so if anything happens, I will be there." "―― What―― are you saying? I can't let someone taking care of me wait out in the hallway―― I have to ask, Hisui―― you stay― right― here." ---Damn it, I can't continue. I feel as if I'm falling into a tank of water. My consciousness ceases abruptly. I saw a dream. It was a dark night. In the middle of the night, I thought I heard a noise and I woke up. The tatami room was otherwise empty. It seems at some point, all the adults went outside. I was a little uneasy all by myself. I went outside to the garden to see where they went. The night itself feels frozen by the winter cold. My breath hangs white in the air. The garden is cold, but at the same time, the sky was beautiful. The expression "freezing cold" seems to have been made up just for this winter night. The cold stars. The deep darkness. Illuminating this world is the lifeless moonlight. For a child like myself, the mansion's garden is too big. A dense forest encloses the garden. The mansion is deep in the mountains, and to be honest, is no place for anyone to live. The mansion is in the very heart of a dark forest. It is― like the light of a luminescent fish at the bottom of the ocean. The darkness of the forest swells deeply. The trees are like a black curtain trying to reach for the moon. I heard a noise, and was convinced the adults must have gone into the forest. I enter the forest. Not even a single ray of light exists in this darkness. Unable to even see my own body, I walk towards the sound. It's just  cold. Even my eyes become numb. I feel as if someone is calling my name. A reed warbler's cry. The swaying grass. There, I met a red demon. The demon does not seem to be interested in me. At the same time, I am not concerned with the demon either. Crimson. Red. Vermillion. I walk past the field that has turned into a crimson sea. The trees part into a clearing. There, the scattered corpses of all the adults are littered all over the ground. The dark ground is bathed in poisonous red, as if the entire world was bleeding. --That is. In the middle of the bleeding earth, the enemy that slaughtered the adults is standing there. --The very first nightmare. The enemy approaches to kill even me. My mother dies, protecting me. --Blood splatters onto my face. In the middle of this frigid night. That warmth. --The first hated color. The claws of the enemy pierce my chest. Maybe I was numb from the coldness. I didn't really feel much pain. --I look up at the heavens. The whole world starts to melt away. There, the unchanging, pale darkness. --How  beautiful. The ephemeral glass moon. Ah---I didn't realize it. Tonight, The moon is sobeautiful- ―――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――― A door closes softly and my consciousness separates from my memories. My heart surfaces. Reality is on the surface. -And I wake from the old dream. "Huh? ―― Why?" Touching my cheeks, I realize I was crying. I don't know what was so painful, or what was so sad. Only, the feeling that I just lost something extremely important remains in my heart. "Was it a nightmare?" I think this is different than those dreams where I killed people. But it was the first time that I slept so well in many days. Maybe it was because Hisui was watching me the whole time. "―― Hisui?" I lift my body and look around the room. I don't see Hisui anywhere. The sound I heard of a door closing was probably her leaving the room just a second ago. Anyway, it is now morning. Today is Friday, so I should go to school. "I have to get up." Maybe it's the aftereffects of yesterday, but I feel a little nauseous when I stand up. "I should change―― What's this, my clothes aren't ready?" It seems like Hisui went to pick up my uniform. Which means she should return soon. "―― Hu―― h?" All of a sudden, all strength drains from my body and I collapse. It feels just like the normal dizziness---only I can't get back up. I can't put any power into my arms or legs. I can barely move my arm, but I can't even get up from the ground. "―― This can't be happening." I desperately try to get up. But I can't move. I can't even do a single push-up from here. "Geez―― looks like my condition is still pretty bad." Floundering around on the carpet, I take in my situation. It's obvious that I won't be able to get up no matter how hard I try. It's not that I'm in so much pain, so I should feel better if I lay here for a while. "Shiki-sama, I have your clothes ready." Hisui opens the door and walks into my room. "Shiki-sama!?" Hisui's voice rings out like a scream, and her footsteps rush toward me. "Shiki-sama, please hold on, Shiki-sama――!" Hisui frantically calls my name. "Hey, morning Hisui. I just fell down a little, so there's no need to panic." "Just fell down---what are you saying, Shiki-sama, you―― !" "I'm fine. If you let me up, I will be fine." "As you wish---" Hisui immediately stoops down and reaches her hand to my shoulder. "Ah――" Hisui suddenly stops her hand. With a strained face, Hisui desperately reaches out her hand with all her will, sweat appearing on her forehead. But that is all she can do. Biting her lip, Hisui tries frantically to touch my shoulder, but she just stands there, shaking uncontrollably. "―― I see. No, don't push yourself, Hisui. Just go get Kohaku-san and it'll be fine." "――――――" Hisui nods and runs out of the room. "―― What was that all about? Hisui's obsession about cleanliness looks pretty bad." Collapsed on the floor, I carelessly voice my thoughts. Kohaku-san arrives soon and lends me her shoulder. ―― Actually, since I don't have any power, Kohaku-san does most of the work. Probably because I'm so weak, but Kohaku-san has the gall to say that I'm as light as a girl. "That's strange―― there's nothing wrong, but my body just won't move." "I see, you do not seem sick, but I can't say anything unless we wait a while. But your face looks fine. I think you will recover soon." Still smiling, Kohaku-san takes my temperature. Because of her smile, I do feel a little more at ease, but―― Hisui has a clouded expression. Even right now, she seems to be hiding behind Kohaku-san and looks at me occasionally. "Nii-san――!" ---And. With a bit of a panic, Akiha bursts into the room. "Yo. You're pretty energetic this morning, Akiha." I raise my hand to greet her. "Wha---" After seeing my face, her expression transforms into surprise. "What's with this exaggeration? I'm fine, so don't make such a scary face. If you do that, I'll be the one to start worrying." "That―― may be true, but---" Akiha stares at me with a pale face. I really am fine, but it seems like Hisui and Akiha honestly think that I am deathly ill or something. "―― Do I look that bad right now?" "No, Shiki-san. You look like you always do. But still, your body is not fully recovered so I think you should take the day off. I'll go call your school to let them know." "―― Yes. Please call the doctor as well. He can perform a more thorough examination." "A thorough examination? ―― I don't think I really need that." "---Nii-san, if you don't care for an examination, maybe we should check you into a hospital instead?" "Ah―― No, an examination will be fine." "Alright. Kohaku, Hisui, please take care of Nii-san. Since he does not seem to concern himself with his health, please do that for him." Akiha gives severe instructions and departs the room. "In that case, I'll use the telephone, okay?" Kohaku-san leaves the room as well. The only ones left are me lying on the bed, and Hisui. "Hisui?" "―― Yes, what is it, Shiki-sama?" "I'm fine, so you can go back to your duties. Since I can't really move, it's not like I'll be going anywhere." "――――" Hisui does not even budge a single step. "―― Hisui? What's wrong, you've been acting a little strange. If you feel sick, go ahead and rest; I don't mind." "――――――――" Hisui stands there in silence. ―― And then. All of a sudden, as if making up her mind, Hisui says, "―― Shiki-sama, you are not mad?" "Wha―? Mad about what?" "Of what happened before. ―― Even though I should take care of you, I could not even help you――" "-Hisui." ―― I am shocked. I didn't even think about that. "Well, it was a bit of a surprise. I thought that you would be able to help me right away, but it ended up being Kohaku-san." "―――――" "But I don't care about that. You may not realize it, Hisui, but you have already helped me so much. Compared to that, what happened earlier is nothing." "―― Really? I do not think I am very useful." "You don't understand, it seems. I'm able to be calm right now because of you being here. ―― It's more than you looking after me; if you weren't here, I don't know what I would do." "――? Because of me?" "Of course. Ever since I came here, I've been uneasy, and always had these nightmares. But when you say good morning to me every day, I'm able to be at peace. ---Therefore, you have helped me so many times. Like today, when you came, it made me happy." "Eh―― Ah, thank you very much." "Um, that's how it is. Even if you can't touch me, your words reach me, don't they? Just that makes me happy enough. Hisui, you are extremely helpful." "Um―― are you serious?" "I'm very serious. As proof, I don't feel like it's morning yet. It's because even though I said it, you haven't said it yet." "---" Hisui looks at me timidly and takes a small breath. "―― Yes, good morning, Shiki-sama." She blushes a bit as she says the words she forgot to say this morning. "That's the thing. Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, so don't worry about it. Hisui, as long as you do what you do, everything will be alright." "―――――" Hisui does not respond. She just looks at me as if she is deep in thought. "Ah-, if you stare at me like that, I'll start to get nervous, Hisui." "Y, yes, forgive me." After saying that, Hisui starts to escape towards the door. "Please excuse me. It appears that Nee-san has contacted the doctor, so he should be here soon." Bowing quickly, Hisui swiftly heads out the door. It was my fault for thinking that a thorough examination would be just taking blood pressure and a few measurements. Being a rich family's doctor, the doctor brings a lot of equipment and sets up an examination room next to mine. After an exhaustive evaluation, the doctor leaves after noon. Leaning on Kohaku's shoulder, I stumble back to my room. All in all, everything took about four hours. "―――― Whew." Lying on my bed, I give a little sigh. Even after the examination, he did not find anything wrong with me. ―― Well, ever since the accident eight years ago and my miraculous recovery, the doctor has always blamed any mysterious symptoms upon it. Well, the best policy is just to sleep here in bed. I thought maybe I should get an IV or something, but if there's nothing wrong with my body, he said it's better if I don't take any medicine. "Shiki-saaan, I'm coming in." Kohaku-san enters my room. She carries something like rice porridge on a tray. "You haven't had anything since this morning, right? It is a little late, but I brought you something to eat." "Oh. Thanks, Kohaku-san." "Not at all, this is my job, after all." Kohaku-san walks right next to my pillow, humming merrily as she holds the spoon. "Um, Kohaku-san?" "Yes, please open your mouth wide." With a big smile, she asks me to do something extremely embarrassing. "―――― Eh?" Not quite understanding the situation, I just open my mouth. And then, after cooling down the rice in the spoon, she sticks the spoon in my mouth. ---With her open hand she holds my jaw and moves it up and down. "―― Kohaku-san, is this some sort of joke?" "Not at all. Shiki-san, you are sick, so it is only natural that I help you to eat." Smiling, Kohaku-san proceeds to attack me a second time. "Gw---" This time, I am able to swallow it by myself. "Good job! Keep it up, Shiki-san." "Wa, wait a second, Kohaku-san――! I may be sick, but it's just my anemia. I can handle feeding myself――!" "Sure, sure, now please calm down. I'm used to things like this." Kohaku-san gives a pleased giggle and starts to attack me a third time. "Nn---" She puts the spoon into my mouth forcefully, and I can't help but just swallow it down. "How does it taste? I heard that when you lived with the Arimas you liked plum porridge." "―― Yes, it is very tasty." "That's good. Then please, eat as much as you like." Kohaku-san appears to be having a fun time. "―― Haa." It seems whatever I say will have no effect. I give up and let Kohaku-san do what she wants. ―― ―――― ―――――― I'm so embarrassed. I'm embarrassed, but I suppose I'm a little happy as well. Kohaku-san's cooking is so delicious, and I finish pretty quickly. "By the way, Shiki-san, how do you feel?" "I'm fine. It just feels like my regular anemia." "Is that so? When you were a child, you received a serious injury here, too, so please do not push yourself." Kohaku-san says this as she straightens up the dishes. "---Kohaku-san, what is that supposed to mean?" "Eh? That just means that you were in an accident and were really injured eight years ago, right? I heard that's why you were adopted by the Arimas: to help to get better." "That's true, but that's not what I meant―― you said that I got injured here at the mansio---" ---In the first place. Just where did I get into the accident that almost killed me? The near fatal wound from my childhood. The accident that caused me to be able to see death's lines. Just how in the world did it happen, and where in the world did I get in that accident, I don't remember anything at all--- "Shiki-san? Is something wrong?" "Eh―― Ah, it's nothing. I don't think you'd understand even if I told you." ---But what I remembered yesterday, it might be something that has to do with the accident eight years ago. That time, I think---there was Akiha, myself, and one more person there--- "I will go and take care of these dishes then." Kohaku-san tries to leave the room. "Wait a sec, Kohaku-san. Back then, we played a lot together, didn't we? At that time, was there someone else with us?" Kohaku-san stops in her tracks. "We played, a lot, together――?" She laughs. As if remembering the past, her nostalgic laughs echoes in the room coldly. "Hmm, maybe it is your imagination? Maybe Hisui-chan might have been with you or something." "Ah, maybe that's it. That could be it." "Of course. Well then, I will see you later." Kohaku-san carries the dishes and leaves the room. "--Well." Having eaten, I feel pretty sleepy. There isn't anything else to do, so I guess I should just sleep a little--- ---All of a sudden, I find myself in an unknown place. This place---looks like a basement that hasn't been used for a long time. Desks and chairs are strewn about. In the back of the room are discarded broken chalkboards and folding chairs. The sun's rays cannot reach this place. In this dark basement that smells like mold, I just breathe in and out. Sitting on top of a desk, hugging my knees. The dead body of a new woman is laying on the floor. The sound of my breathing. It's ragged. That thing is thinking that it does not have enough blood. That thing is thinking that it wants to eat fresh meat. I'm thinking that I want to kill people. *pant*  *pant*   *pant* *pant*  *pant*   *pant* *pant*  *pant*   *pant* Our breathing matches rhythm. "Who is it!" Raising my voice, I look around. In this basement, there is no one else. *pant*  *pant*   *pant* *pant*  *pant*   *pant* *pant*  *pant*   *pant* "Damn it, it's you again!" It shouts this at me. "I won't――! I took this woman myself! I won't give her to you." Saying that, it bites into the dead body. Munch. Squish, rip. The sound of intestines being chewed. ---Exhaling. *pant*  *pant*   *pant*  *pant* My breathing gets ragged. Somehow. Just like that thing's breathing, my breathing starts to get wild as well. "I'll kill you." *pant*  *pant*  *pant*   *pant* "Soon, soon, I'll, kill, you." As if it lost its mind, it starts to wolf down everything, even the bones. "Shiki-sama, are you sleeping?" "Eh?" Suddenly, Hisui appears in front of me. "Hisui―― when did you come in?" "When―― you ask? It has been about five minutes since I finished changing your sheets." "Oh. Sorry, I was sleeping and didn't notice you come in." "―― Shiki-sama, please do not joke around. You accepted me coming into the room, and you ordered me to change the sheets." "Wha---" What's going on? Up until now, I was asleep, had another nightmare, and I woke up to Hisui's voice―― "―― Hisui. Did I look like I was awake?" "―― Yes. After I changed the sheets, you closed your eyes, which is why I inquired if you were sleeping." "---No, I won't sleep anymore right now." Somehow responding, I look at my hand. ―― Lifting my hand is still difficult. I haven't gotten even the slightest bit better. My heavy body. My bodythe body of Tohno Shiki, feels like it belongs to some other person. "―― I'll be awake for a while. Do you have work after this?" "No, today I will be watching over you―― If it is alright with you, I would like to take care of you, Shiki-sama." I can't help but be grateful. If Hisui is here, I probably won't see nightmares like the one I saw before. "―― That's exactly what I wish, Hisui. If I am not a burden to you, please stay in my room." "---Yes. Then I shall do so, Shiki-sama." After giving a bow, Hisui stands and watches me intently. "Um, you don't have to concentrate so hard. I would be happier if you maybe just bring in a chair and read a book or something. I'm just going to kill some time too." "Ah―― yes, as you wish." Hisui quickly leaves the room. I'm sure she will come back with a book and a chair, just like I suggested. "You're pretty dutiful, aren't you, Hisui?" I laugh a little as I say this. It feels like ages since the time I met Hisui again and thought that she was simply a cold, expressionless girl. Well, that's all I thought back then, but now---I think I understand Hisui a little better. "---C'mon, Hisui, hurry back." Leaning on the bed, I really do mean this. If she's going to be around, being sick like I am right now doesn't sound bad at all. Hisui nursing me turns out to be her just being with me. Not being able to touch someone of the opposite gender, Hisui can't really take care of me physically. Taking my temperature or wiping the sweat off my brow is Kohaku-san's role, and Hisui just stays by me, listening to me when I ask for anything, like something to drink. But that doesn't mean that I'm dissatisfied. It's not that she was always there, but she was there most of the time. Thanks to that, I didn't see any terrible dreams. It becomes a little before ten o'clock, right before bedtime. "Nii-san, how are you feeling?" Akiha comes to see how I'm doing. "Yeah, I feel fine. Even though I still can't move my body freely, I think I'll be better tomorrow. This kind of thing happened to me once before, and it's exactly the same as back then." "---I'm glad to hear it. It makes me feel a little more at ease." Akiha exhales and visibly relaxes. "Good night, Nii-san. Ah, but even if you feel better, don't strain yourself. It wouldn't do you any good to get hurt again." "I know that. ―― G'night, Akiha. Thanks for all of your concern." "Eh―― Well, we are brother and sister, it's only natural―― Anyway, please take care. I do not want to see you collapsed again tomorrow." With a light smile, Akiha exits the room. "-" It is time for bed. If I can't move, I can't go out anywhere. I have to get enough sleep and make sure that I'll be better tomorrow. Not thinking of anything, I decide to sleep for tonight. The light from the window wakes me up. "---I didn't have any dreams." It really was just a sleep without dreams, good or bad. Thanks to that, I don't feel bad at all. Today's Saturday, so I should probably thank Hisui and Kohaku-san for taking care of me. It's only just past six. All I did was lie down yesterday, so I don't feel tired anymore. "---Time to get up!" I get up from bed. "-Eh?" My body doesn't move at all. ―― I haven't healed at all. If anything, it's worse. Yesterday, I could move my arms, but today I can't even do that. "Kk" I try to bring my arm straight up. ―― ――― ―――― "Ha―― ah." I finally manage to do so. Using all of my strength, it takes me about a full minute. "―― What's going on?" It's like my body is dead. Or more like a robot out of gas. At any rate, my body won't move. At the same time, I am fully conscious, and I don't feel any pain. "Hey, Hisui---Kohaku-san---" I was going to tell them to come here, but I stop. I can speak, but using a loud voice makes me extremely dizzy. ―― It almost feels like a loud voice uses too much muscle, placing too much strain on the blood flow to the brain. "Ha-" I breathe out. I guess all I can do is just wait for Hisui to come wake me up. ---After that, it's pretty much like yesterday morning. Since I was already in bed, it went by just a bit faster than yesterday. After coming to wake me up, a pale-faced Hisui called for Kohaku-san, who did a little check up. Hearing this, Akiha once again ran into my room, called the same doctor as yesterday, who did the same examination, and I end up resting in bed. ―― Since sleeping in bed all day makes me pretty sick, I am now leaning my upper body on the headboard. "Shiki-sama, did you say something?" "N――? No, I was just zoning out. I didn't say anything." "---" "Hey, what's with that expression? I told you that I'm not in any pain or anything, so you don't need to worry." "―― I am very sorry, Shiki-sama." "I told you it's alright―― Geez, you really are worrisome. Well, I guess you two really are sisters. You're a lot like Kohaku-san in that way." "EhI'm like Nee-san?" Hisui asks, very surprised. ―― Well, I wasn't referring to appearance, as that's pretty obvious. "Yeah, it's a pretty old story. Did you know that Kohaku-san has acted like an older sister since we were small? Whenever Akiha or I would get hurt, Kohaku-san would get so worried. ―― No, it's fine if it was only when we were hurt, but even when we were not feeling well, she would be very fussy, telling us to go to sleep, go to sleep." "Eh―― She was really, that fussy?" "Yeah, I felt pretty bashful when she'd do it. ―― Hmm, when was it? I remember once when I caught a cold, I wanted to play anyway. Kohaku-san, she would keep telling me to go to bed over and over. Eventually, she won and I went back to my room, but after that, she came into my room and lay a wet towel on me. I really thought she would smother me to death." "――――," "Come to think of it, this time around, I think Kohaku-san wasn't worried as much as I thought, but maybe she wanted to act as a nurse or something. She really did seem to enjoy it." "――――――――," "Ah, but I don't mean I didn't like what Kohaku-san did. I liked what she would do, and playing with Akiha was also fun. ―― That's right. Come to think of it, I had a pretty happy time as a kid." "---Yes. I am sure Nee-san feels the same way." Hisui nods quietly. ―― Oh no. Simply talking about my childhood like this, Hisui must be getting bored. "---Sorry. I didn't mean to bore you with this kind of talk." "Please do not worry about it. I enjoy it." "Eh, really――? In that case――" Certainly Hisui doesn't look bored at all. "Yes. As long as it does not bother you, please continue on. The doctor said that any sort of activity is preferable." ―― I see. They say to move my body, but it's really just my mouth I can move right now. "Geez. I don't really have much to talk about, although I do have a lot of memories of my childhood." "I do not mind. Please, tell me about your childhood, Shiki-sama." "―― Really? But I think it'll just be boring, are you sure?" "Yes, I am really, enjoying this." Hisui gives an extremely happy smile. "-" Completely forgetting about the state I'm in now, my heart starts to race. ―― The smile that is so rarely seen on Hisui's face is, it makes me blush, and, well--- "Shiki-sama? Is there something wrong?" "Ah---no, it's nothing. Well, let's continue talking about the past then." Hisui nods. As I continue to remember more and more about the past, I continue my boring, inane monologue. At lunchtime, Kohaku-san comes in and trades places with Hisui. Kohaku-san brings a wash pail and several towels. "――――" I get a really bad feeling about this. "Shiki-san, we have to wash your body, so please endure this." "" I knew it. "――― Um" Even though it is something I'd hate to do, I can't exactly say no. It's obvious that since I can't move my body, someone has to clean it for me. I've been laying around since yesterday, and to be honest, I do feel sticky and pretty gross. "―― Yes. Please." "Not at all, I'm the one who should be saying please." ―― And it's over. It was deadly embarrassing, but I can't fight Kohaku-san. After all, Kohaku-san helps me get to the bathroom when I have to go. After receiving so much care from Kohaku-san, I think being embarrassed is rude to her. "All finished. Thank you for your cooperation." After changing me into a new set of pajamas, she replaces my sheets. "But Shiki-san, you really have no strength at all, do you? I was surprised when you didn't even flinch when I was washing you." "―― You're right. I wonder what's wrong with my body?" Normally, when someone is taking care of you, if they move your arms and legs, there is some sort of muscular reaction in the body. Since the reaction is there, the one doing the caring usually takes a lot of work, but I don't even have that reaction right now. It's like I'm a boneless jellyfish. "Jellyfish―― I might be quite right." I meant it to be a joke, but I don't feel like laughing. ―― How do I put it, it's almost as if I'm not quite alive. The fact that I can't move my body. I didn't think that not having any feeling in my body would be this scary. It's like I'm almost in a dream, just a vague existence. "Shiki-san, please don't make that uneasy face. Whatever the reason, I'm sure you will be able to return to normal soon." "―― I'm sure. But I wonder what the reason is." ―― If there is a reason, it would be this scar from eight years ago. The doctor said that it was simply a miracle to be alive. Perhaps this is the price of my miraculous recovery. ---If that is the case, then I, Tohno Shiki, may never be able to even stand on my own for the rest of my life. "Shiki-san? Are you okay? You look terrible." "Ah―― I just imagined something terrible and got a little scared." "Ah, that's no good, Shiki-san! If your spirit is weak, you will never be able to recover." "---I guess you're right. I guess I'll try to think positive―― Thank you very much, Kohaku-san." "As long as you understand. You understand things pretty well, and you always seem to accept your circumstances. So I think it is okay if you complain every once in a while." ―― Kohaku-san seriously offers some advice. Suddenly, I remember what I was telling Hisui earlier. "―― Geez. Kohaku-san, you still do like to nurse people, don't you?" "Huh? What do you mean by that?" "Remember way back, when I caught a cold and wanted to play anyway? It's just like back then." "Hmm, I guess something like that happened. You never said anything about how you felt, Shiki-san." "But you found out quickly. Afterwards, you made me go back to the detached building, and I never forgave you for that." ―― Not really; I was actually extremely grateful, but I thought I'd tease Kohaku-san a little bit. "-" And then― Kohaku-san tries earnestly to remember, and she freezes in place. "―― Huh. What's this, did you forget?" "I guess so. I'm sorry, my memory is not all that great." "No, it's hard to remember stuff from eight years ago, so it's no big deal." "You're right. I remember most of the things, but it's something from eight years ago, so maybe I might be forgetting something important too." ―― I completely agree. Before I went to that garden in the forest, I had forgotten entirely the image of the accident eight years ago. "Well then, I'll bring you some food, so please rest until then." In the afternoon, I become alone. I feel bad letting Kohaku-san and Hisui take care of me all the time, so I had them return to their duties. Since I didn't have any hideous nightmares last night, even though I can't move, my health is pretty stable. I figure I can manage by myself until dinner time. "―― Well, my body can't move, so I can't say my health is good or bad." Leaning back against the headboard, I stare aimlessly. It's been ten days since I came back to the mansion. At first, I felt out of place, but now I feel very comfortable in this room. You can't underestimate the adaptability of the human mind, I suppose. ---And. ---My headache. "――― Eh?" Lines. I can see lines. "My glasses are on---so why?" *pant**pant**pant* ", Who is it!?" I move my head. There's no one in the room except me. *pant**pant**pant* I can hear someone breathing. Something that sounds like a wild dog's salivated breathing reaches my ears. *pant**pant**pant* "Wh--" I manage to turn my head. But there is no one behind me. I can't even sense anyone. Is it some sort of auditory hallucination? No. It is a hallucination, but it is real. *pant**pant**pant* It isn't echoing through my room. It's echoing inside of my head. In that case, this breathing, is without a doubt, coming from inside my brain. *pant**pant**pant* *pant**pant**pant* Mixing together. Progressively mixing together. This unknown voice and my breathing harmonize together. What is this? Just what is this? I'm about to merge with him. I am about to fuse with him. Triangle cogwheels and / Diamond cogwheels Noise / Echo Panorama / Strings There shouldn't be any point of connection between us Even in an illusion, knowing should be rejected. Strange Strange What are you What are you I am I am! "Ah-" The torrent breaks through. Spinning. Spinning. Spinning spinning the world is spinning. Sun and moon. Female and lion. Angel and pollution. Colliding uphill paths. Broken hourglass. Upwards falling sand. Shattered window and a door without a handle. Darkness. Darkness. Darkness. Darkness. Darkness. "S, to---" I'm getting crushed. Melting wall. Solvable meaning. Self who can explain. Smoothness of changeable permeability. Transitioning time. Observation life and execution function. A pinky-less hand. Headless eyes. Rolling carpet. Once. Twice. Three Times. 777 cages. Burst balloon. Unfulfillable promise. Unprotectable law. Death contract. Poison and honey. Red and afterbirth. Mercury lamp and bug light. Light refracting to countless dimensions. Swimming fish, singing at the ocean bottom. Tools, tools, tools. Towards endlessly reproducing stars without meaning, without will. Better than wishes. Another only me. Unraveling deep sea. Contradictory that appears from microscopic organisms. Detailed view of a quark. Rejection of everything. Formless form. An embryo within a hearse. I curse and celebrate their existence. Haha ahahaha. "What, is this" Cessation is disregard. The bleeding earth. Trade your blood for poison and you will attain immortality. Rose. Rose. Rose. Rose. Your splendor will not last forever. The way to reach Lohan's temple, eat this bread. Spreading defilement. The April that's farther than May, the reversal of limbs, awaken in the shrine of balance beyond the dual serpent and scorpion. The skin of rotten fruit. Burned puppet of celluloid. The cannabis of Legion. Grinding and friction. Sun and Moon. Colliding uphill paths. Female and lions. Broken hourglass. Spiraling clouds. I am unparalleled. Upwards falling sand. Eight years ago. Killed. Killed. Killed. Killed. Killed. Killed. Killed. Killed. You. Killed! Ha haha ahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! "Shu--shut, up!" *pant**pant**pant* ―― It stops. Trying with all my might, I bang my head against the wall, and it stops. "---What the hellwas that just now" I don't know. Just random words filled my mind, and I couldn't think about anything. Anything at all---not being able to think, and all those words repeating machine-like in my head. "―――― Ah." I notice that tears are streaming from my eyes. Mucus and drool are streaming down my face as well. "Ag!" My head hurts. It's not a normal headache I get from my anemia. My brain feels like it's about to explode. It's because even though I have a limit to my memory, much more than I can handle has flowed into my brain. "――――" Once more. Once more, if that inexplicable headache returns. At this rate---my mind will surely break before my body does. Aha ahaha ha "Wh" "Sto" It's flowing. No, I'm picking it up. That guy's knowledge, of a level so far beyond that of ours, is picked up by me. Yes, we are about to merge. The fusion between me and him had already begun. It was eight years ago. The white summer day. Empty shells of cicadas. Feasting ants. Someone's sudden death. The gravitation towards extreme pain, spurting blood, going into shock. Shrinking field of vision. Nothing but darkness. Nothing but crimson. The crisis of death. Abortion. Cutting up the birthing woman when the baby is still inside, inside this hungry world, sampling the flesh of babies. Pointless   all of it. "St---op." As long   as you keep     your eyes      open, I   will become   one     with you. "-Ch!" I desperately close my eyes, as if imploring for help. "――――― Ha――――― ah." It's subsided. The flow of information and the voice inside my head ceases. "―― Thank―― goodness." I breathe a sigh of relief. But on the other hand, I feel a chill go down my spine. "―― If I open my eyes―― that will happen again?" I don't know. Maybe that was instantaneous. But I'm too terrified to open my eyes. A disgusting sensation. It feels like a caterpillar is crawling within my brain. "-" ―― I become sleepy. But if I sleep, I might see those nightmares again. "I don't care. That dream is much better then what happened now." I relax my consciousness. With my eyes still closed, I fall asleep. ---Ah, I've come here again. The dark basement. The smell of mold emanating from the darkness. ―― The school's, probably the gym's basement. The dispersed celluloid mannequin. No, the pieces of half eaten people. He's. Even though it's this early, it has brought yet another doll. *pant**pant**pant* The animalistic breathing. *pant**pant**pant*! The figure bites into the doll. The feeling of teeth breaking the skin. The fat of the abdomen is not exactly what you can call grade-A meat. The hot blood sticking to the throat. ---I feel a chill. All these sensations are completely transmitted to me. "Y, y y y y you again, Shiki!" It screams. "Damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it-!" It acts as a child throwing a tantrum. Breaking all the desks, and pulling off pieces of concrete from the floor. "I'll kill you, I'll kill you, I'll kill you―― !" Saying so. It thrusts a knife in its own hand. --Gi!? The pain of the knife is transmitted to my own hand. "Just you watch, I will kill you---" He then takes the leg of a broken desk and impales his own leg. Ga---. "And I'll take back what you stole-" Using his own claws, he rips open his stomach and starts to pull out his intestines. ---The, pain. Pain. Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain, Pain Pain--!!!" "These fingers, this skin, even these eyes!" He pushes in his eyes. ---I start to go crazy. A dream. If this is a dream, please, wake up! It hurts. I'd rather. Die. This pain is enough to kill me from shock, but I am not dying. "Your voice, your position, all of it is mine, it was all originally mine---! Just you wait, I will kill you, I will come soon――!" Screaming. It takes a knife,    brings it to it's head,     aims for the brain,     and stabs deeply. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" In the middle of the ultimate pain, I wake up. "Ahhhghaa, aagh, aghhh!" A dream. That was a dream. "G―!" But my body is hurting everywhere. Hand, thigh, eyes, skull. They all hurt. The pain I received during my dream, I have brought it back into reality. "Ahh!" But my body still can't move. Even though I feel like there is a hole ripped in my palm, I still can't move my body. "Ah---ah." At least if I could move---I could thrash around and maybe reduce some of the agony, but I can't even do that. "Damnit." What is, this? "Why---do these things―" Earlier, I thought my mind would break before my body would. "Why, do these, things happen, to me―― !" But if I sleep, my body may very well break before my mind. "That guy---what is he?" That someone who comes in my dreams. That someone who knows me, whose nerves became one with mine. The one who kills people every night. What's this? You won't admit it yet? "―― Admit, what?" I am you. "―― No way." You are the same as me. "―― No. I'm still sane." For the longest time,   you have already been crazy. "―― I told you no――!" "Shiki-sama---!" ---And, without a knock, Hisui enters my room. "Hi---sui――?" "Shiki-sama, was that your voice just now---!?" Hisui walks to the bed with an urgent expression. "WhaShiki-sama, what, in the world" Hisui's voice is shaking. ―― I look down. My sheets are soaked in blood. ---It looks like the blood came from my hand and my thigh. I say 'looks like' because I just think so. Because there's no wounds on my body, so what's wrong is the fact that the blood's there― "Hisui-chan, I will prepare an IV, so please watch over Shiki-san." "Wait, Nee-san, Shiki-sama is" "Hisui-chan. Don't you think it's best to listen to what your older sister has to say once in a while?" "Ah" "Now, Shiki-san, you are going to have a blood transfusion soon, so please relax until then." After taking care of me, Kohaku-san leaves the room. "Shiki-sama---is there really nothing wrong? Nee-san told me not to worry, but all that blood---" "―― Pretty persistent, aren't you? I said there isn't anything wrong. I don't have any wounds. I'm the one with questions." ---Saying this roughly, I hate myself. I'm sorry for Hisui, but I can't calm down. There---must be something wrong with me. If I sleep, I dream of the killer and hurt myself. I know that's the cause of the bleeding. I know, but I can't tell Hisui or Kohaku-san that. They wouldn't believe me, and worse, they would think I have simply gone crazy. I'll admit my body is weird. But Hisui, Kohaku-san and Akiha, I just don't want them to think I am crazy. I do not want to say that. "But Shiki-sama, your body is not working properly. You appear to have a fever, and your breathing is wild, I do not---" wish to see you like this. Hisui swallows the rest of her sentence. "―― I'm fine; go away. Thanks for worrying about me, but I just want to be alone for now." "―― Then, is there something you want? If you are thirsty, please tell me, and I can bring you something." "Something---I want?" Something I want? I don't really want anything right now. "―― Yeah, I am certainly thirsty――" Yes, thirsty. Really thirsty. So I must suck. Red, drink. That sticky fluid that sticks to my throat. Hot, crimson red blood that is still warm, that's what I want right now "Ah" "―― Shiki-sama?" Something I, want. Of course there's something I want. That is― Hisui's body I saw in my dream. "Tss!" Smack! I hit myself in the head. The arm that I couldn't move before was able to be moved out of pure hatred for myself. "Shiki-sama!? What is wrong, Shiki-sama!" "Don't come near me!" "Shiki―― sama." I breathe painfully. My throat is burning. My body is burning. There's something wrong with me. There's something wrong with me. There's something wrong with me. What was I just thinking!? "―― Don't come near me―― If you do, I don't know what, I will do." "But, Shiki-sama---" "I told you not to come near me――! I'm not crazy――!" I scream, refusing Hisui's help. But if I don't do so, I will violate Hisui for sure. Like that time in my dream. Being controlled by my pulse through my veins. "---Just leave. Hisui, you don't understand, anything about my body." "―― Yes. As you wish, Shiki-sama." Hisui leaves. As she leaves, I stare at her with hazy vision. ---My excited body thinks about the same thing, no matter who I saw. When Kohaku-san came to give me transfusion, I had the urge to sink my teeth into her white throat. II can't retain my sanity unless I'm alone. So I made Hisui and Kohaku-san, even Akiha go out of my room. ---The result doesn't change. If I am alone, all I can do is break. "Gu――" I get a headache. If I stay awake, the headache flows into me. Before I go crazy, I close my eyes to sleep. But then, if I sleep, I will dream about him. Every time he inflicts pain on his body, I also feel the physical pain. "Agh." That pain causes me to wake up. But as soon as I do so, the splitting pain in my head returns. So I close my eyes---and I fall asleep again. ――――――― And I repeat this process. I go into a light sleep, and wake up from the pain of getting my brain stabbed through. Breathing is painful. I gasp for air. My limbs won't move, but they shake from the pain. I have no sense of time. An hour feels like infinity. Truthfully, I― I don't even think that I will be able to maintain my sanity until the morning. ---The door opens with a creak. The sound of approaching footsteps. ―― I am half asleep, and I can't tell exactly who it is. "---Nii-san, you look so exhausted." She sounds like she is crying. "---I'm so sorry―― You're in this much pain, but there is nothing I can do." The weight of fingers. "This is the only thing---that I can do, Nii-san." Akiha wraps her fingers in mine. Throb. Throb. Throb. Matching the sound of my IV, Akiha's body temperature flows into me. ---Warm. It feels like my rotten wall of my consciousness got rebuilt by just that. "Hold on, Nii-san. I will save you soon." ―― Her fingers separate. The sound of footsteps goes away. ---The door closes. ―― In my half-sleep, I saw that strange dream. It's been several mornings. Time-wise, it is only the next morning from last night, but for me, having alternated between being asleep and being awake, time and day is of no concern. "Excuse me, Shiki-sama." I hear a voice, and Hisui enters the room. "Good morning. I have brought you something to drink." "――――――" I don't even have the energy to say thank you. I can only stare longingly at what Hisui brought me. "Shiki-sama, can you drink it by yourself? If you can not move freely yet, I can help you." She leans over to me to check my condition. Helping me to drink, she says, but she won't even touch my body. More importantly, I can't allow her to get close to me. It's just the same as yesterday. Even though my body won't move, every time I see Hisui or Kohaku-san, I ---I feel like going crazy. "―― I can drink water by myself. Please just leave the glass over there." "Yes, as you wish." Hisui places the glass down and waits by the wall. I manage to move my arm, and place my lips on the cup. The cold water is tasteless, just like air. The burning in me cannot be soothed by just this water, and my thirst cannot be quenched by such a thing. Hisui stares at me silently from the wall. ―― What is this? Not being able to move for only three days, and I already feel jealous of Hisui. Being able to move freely like that, not having to feel this pain, I start to get a little annoyed. "Hisui." "Yes, what is it, Shiki-sama?" "If you have finished your task, please leave. I can't relax with people around me like this." "---But Shiki-sama, in that case―" "I told you if I need anything, I'll call for you. ―― Don't make me say the same thing over and over again. Talking makes me pretty tired." "―― As you wish. I will return in a while, so please do not strain yourself." The door closes. ―― Hisui comes every hour to take care of me. I let out a deep sigh. I feel even more tired. Thinking that I have to turn back Hisui like this more than ten times today makes me depressed from self-hatred. "Ahh―――!" A pain stabbing my arm causes me to waken. I gasp for air. It appears I fell asleep at some point. That person is still in that basement, continuing to kill his body. "Damn―― it." I strike the wall with my fist. How long do I have to stand this pain? Or will this pain continue forever until I do something to him personally? "Just what in the world do I have to do---!" I strike the wall again. ―― Huh? "―― My body, it's moving." I lift my upper body from bed. The motion which took me about an hour to do before seems so natural now---no, like it always has been---and I may even be healed. "Alright! ―― I'm all better―― ! I'm so happy, I jump out from the bed. Whump. "Eh?" Something falls down. I lower my gaze. On the carpet, is my forearm, which detached itself from my elbow. "--Sssttt!" ―― I guess it was a dream. Using all of my power, I lift my upper body. My arm is still attached to my body. I don't have any feeling, not even pain. It appears I'm not broken yet. "Shiki-sama, may I please enter?" ―― Hisui's voice. I guess it's time for her to check up on me again. "―― Yeah, come in." "Excuse me." "Shiki-sama, please lie down. The doctor has told you not to sit up." "Well, I can't be sleeping all day. And even if you call him a doctor, I don't have any appreciation if he can't help me at all." Hisui lowers her shoulders silently with an apologetic look. ―― I feel annoyed. If she acts like that I'll just get more miserable, why can't she understand that, this woman--. "--Stop it. If you keep showing such a pitying face, I'll just feel worse." "---I am very sorry, Shiki-sama." "―― If you have something to do, hurry up and do it. I can't do anything, so it should be easy for you to change the sheets or my IV." "―― Yes, as you wish." Hisui wordlessly changes my IV bag. Taking care of the sweat and blood-stained sheets along with my pajamas is apparently Kohaku-san's job. Even though she's done, Hisui does not withdraw from the bedside. "Hisui――?" "---Shiki-sama. May I ask you a question――?" "?" Hisui's voice seems to be quivering. "―― Yeah, what is it?" "―― Shiki-sama, does your body―― hurt?" "Wha--" For a moment, I almost yell at Hisui. Does my body hurt? Can she---someone not me, understand the pain I'm going through? I'm about to go insane from the constant sensation of my body being stabbed, and I can't even move while all this is happening. She looks at me like that and asks me if my body hurts--- "---Who knows. I don't know. I've just become numb all over." "―――― Ye――― s." Hisui's voice is shaking more and more. "It feels like my body is being burned by an invisible fire. I'm dying bit by bit from my fingers onward." "――――" Hisui stays there in pained silence. ―― ――― ―――― ――――― And then, "---Shiki-sama, I―" Hisui's voice is no longer shaking. Calm, as always, uninflected voice. "I cannot stand seeing you like this any longer." Hisui says all of this, but her expressionless face seems like she doesn't care about me. ---My heart starts to race. "" The impulse to want her increases. Hisui stands this close to me. Her body is this close. If I just reach out my arms, I can make her mine--- "Shiki-sama, I―" "Shut up――! Don't look at me with that face!" This anger is totally unexpected. I can't stand her expressionless face, so I take the IV bag and throw it at her. Splat! The red stain splashes all over Hisui. But her expression does not change. "---Shiki-sama, please do not strain yourself." That way of talking. That expressionless, voice. "―― Shut up! This is my body, I can do what I want with it――!" Her unchanging expression. It gets more and more on my nerves. "That's it. Hisui, this has nothing to do with you. Of course you don't feel pain or anything like that!" "Shiki-sama---please, calm down." Her expression still does not change. No matter what I say to her, she receives it quietly. ---That only makes me even angrier. "Yeah, of course. Compared to you, I can never be that calm. Because as hurt as I am, you don't even raise an eyebrow, and you just calmly observe me---!" "Shiki-sama, please do not push yourself. If you yell like that, your body may get worse." "Why―― you――! That's enough, get out of here! I'm sick and tired of looking at you, you're worthless――!" "---As you wish. Please excuse me, Shiki-sama." Hisui leaves the room. As she does so, I happen to see her fingers. Her fingers are clenched so tightly, I expected to see blood flow. ―― As if she is trying to kill her expression as much as possible. "Ah" I understand instantly that it is for my sake. Since I told her not to pity me. She just withstood all my selfish venting of anger on her--- "Damn― what am I doing?" It's not like I'll get better if I take it out on Hisui. No, not just that, but I--- "-Gah." ―― There really is something wrong with me. Not only did I take it out on her like that, but when she was close, I was lusting for her. If seeing her skin so close and smelling her light fragrance makes me want all of her, I'm no different than him. That's why I said  we are the same. "Again---" Because you  and I  are  the same person. "Shut---up!" That's right the same  just like I was   locked up all this time   you too. "Shut up---" In this room locked up  for life. "Wh---" Unable to leave this prison  forever. "Y---ou." Eternally locked away――! "I said, shut up――!" I slam my head against the wall. The voice stops. ―― But, as a price, my consciousness fades. "――――" Then, I dream of the basement again. ---It's afternoon now. The headache that greets me when I awake is slightly less then usual. "―――――" Kohaku-san finishes changing me for the third time and leaves. ―― Hisui did not come again after that incident. "Of course. ―― After what I said, it's only natural not to come back." ―― Hisui won't come again. Just thinking that, I start to feel my spirit drift far away, but I understand that it's to both of our benefits. If by some chance, she does come again, all I will do is take it out on her again, and I don't deserve her kindness. "―― Please excuse me, Shiki-sama." Saying that, Hisui enters my room. Hisui shuts the door, but does not come any closer. In her hand, she holds a tray with a glass of water. "I have brought you something to drink, do you care for it?" "" Hisui really is expressionless. But, I can still see her fingertips shaking. "―― Hisui." ―― Why? After all those terrible things I said, why is she still taking care of me? "―― It's okay, Hisui. You don't have to force yourself; if you don't wish to be near me, it's fine." "Shiki-sama, I am not forcing myself. Rather, please do not force yourself, Shiki-sama." Hisui's emotionless voice. Her shaking fingers. ―― I finally realize it. It isn't that her voice is emotionless; it's that she's killing the emotion in her voice. "―― I'm sorry. You can hate me, if you want." "It is alright, Shiki-sama. I cannot do anything, so it is natural for you to scold me." That, isn't natural at all. The only one at fault is me. "―― I'm sorry. My body is a little heavy. I don't think I can drink by myself, can you please help me?" "―― Yes. I have been waiting for those words." Hisui walks towards my bed. "―― Please excuse me." Saying that with a restrained voice, she lifts my body. "Eh---Hisui?" "Please, drink slowly." With one hand supporting my back, she brings the glass to my mouth. Until now, Hisui never touched me no matter what. "――――" Gulping down a few mouthfuls, I shake my head. Hisui puts the glass to the side. Then she puts her hand on my forehead. Thump. My heart starts to pound heavily in a totally different way then other times. "Hisui---is this, alright?" Hisui lifts her hand. "―― There does not, seem to be a fever." Hisui murmurs this. I didn't even think so. All of my pain seems to fade away with just that--- "Hisui―― Can I ask you a favor?" "Yes, what is it, Shiki-sama?" "Aa--could you please, keep your hand there for a bit longer." "Why―― do you want me to do that?" "―― Your cool hand, it feels good. If you do that, I can relax." ---All of my pain disappears as if it was merely a lie. Hisui's cheeks turn slightly red, and with a smile, she places her hand on my forehead. "―― That's strange―― Why do I feel nostalgic, all of a sudden――" I feel relaxed. My consciousness starts to become at ease. ―― Yeah, come to think of it, I felt like this when Hisui took care of me like this before. "―― Thank you―― and sorry, Hisui." My consciousness sinks into oblivion. For a brief period of time. For the first time in days, I slip into a peaceful sleep without any pain or suffering. It's midnight, and I made Hisui return to her room. Even though I felt better earlier, I don't know when that headache will return and make me lose my sanity. "――――" Furthermore, there is something still wrong with my body. Even though I can't even move my fingers, I wouldn't be surprised if they suddenly moved against my will to attack Hisui or Kohaku-san. "Ouu---" My headache does not stop. My body does not move. Maybe it's not just pain being transmitted when that guy hurts his own body. "Ah---ha,a,haa――――!" I cough uncontrollably. Ever since he started stabbing himself in the throat with a knife, I haven't been able to breathe properly. "Ahh―― gghaa―― ah―― ggggg." *wheeze* *wheeze* My hoarse voice echoes through the night. I can't even perform a simple task like breathing normally unless I concentrate. "―― Is this―― the end?" This body was supposed to have died eight years ago. It's not that I never thought I would end up like this. "Ha――― haha, ha." But maybe this is for the best. I've always watched him kill people in my dreams. But, maybe "he" never existed in the first place---maybe it was me all along. ―― I remember Yumizuka's words. She said that I was a true killer. Back then, all I could do was deny it, but now---I don't even have the power to do so. My disturbed mind. My broken body. The dreams I have of killing people. The voice that echoes within me, the voice that isn't mine. ―― The Tohno Shiki who can't stop imagining how I violated Hisui. "―――― Ah!" The headache that feels like my skull is cracking. It's like the sound of the killer's personality devouring my soul. ―― The forgotten memory of that incident. My figure coated in blood. Then maybe, my dreams of killing people might be forgotten memories surfacing once again. "---Gah――! Ah, auuuu――!" Pain floods my consciousness. I can hear a voice that tells me to kill something, anything. ―― Ah, but it's alright. Even if I am a killer, I couldn't possibly kill anyone the way I am now. Just like he said, I'm locked up in here, not even being able to take a step outside by myself *wheeze*, *wheeze*, *wheeze* *wheeze*, *wheeze*, *wheeze* *wheeze*. *wheeze*. *wheeze*. *wheeze*. "―― Shiki-sama!? Please, hold on, Shiki-sama――!" *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze*――! "Please excuse me, Shiki-sama――!" *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* "―― H―― uh―― Hisu,i――?" "Thank goodness―― You have awoken, Shiki-sama." Hisui speaks to me in a clipped voice. *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* "―― ?" I don't understand why Hisui is looking at me like that. "―― What happened Hisui? Looking at me like that, did something happen?" "―――― No, it's nothing. Shiki-sama, please rest your body; you do not need to think about anything at all." "―― Yeah, I'm already doing that." *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* "But Hisui, isn't it loud this morning? I can't sleep well with this wheezing sound coming from somewhere." "―― Shiki-sama, that is―" Hisui falls silent with a strained expression on her face. *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* The sound keeps coming. I can hear it coming from near me. "!" I cough. Only during that instant does the sound stop. "A---" ―― Well, I feel stupid. The wheezing sound was only my breathing this whole time. "Man. It's not like I've caught a cold." "――――" With tight lips, Hisui hangs her head. It looks like she wants to say something, but she can't. ―― Hisui seems to be acting that way. "Hisui, why are you so quiet? You haven't done anything wrong, so relax." "---Yes. If there is anything I can do, I will try my hardest to do so." "Um, you don't have be so tense, Hisui. As long as you're here, I can relax, and it's better for me if you smile." "―― Um, is this face acceptable?" Hisui looks at me with an incredibly serious face. ―― In all honesty, the look she has now is nothing like the smile she has shown before, but seeing Hisui try so hard does make me happy. "Yeah, you can relax even more if you want. ―― Could you bring me something to drink? My throat is so dry I can hardly breathe." "Yes, I already have a drink ready for you." Hisui disappears from my view. The drink probably is set by the wall. Hisui comes back with a silver tray and places her hand on my back to lift me up. ---In that instant. As soon as I feel her hand on my back, it comes with disgusting speed. "Shiki-sama, is this alright?" "It is not good to drink it all at once, so please drink this slowly." "Shiki-sama? If you do not open your mouth, it will spill." "Get away--!" "Kyaa!" *Crash* The glass falls to the floor. Hisui sits on the floor where I pushed her away. I start to wheeze once more. My breathing is as ragged as that of a wild beast. "Shikisama." Hisui isn't mad that I pushed her; instead, she's even more worried. "Pl, please forgive me―― I moved you without asking, I should not have done such a shameful thing---" "No---that's not it. It isn't your fault――!" ―― The one to blame. "That's not it at all. You haven't done anything wrong." The one to blame, is me, wheezing even more heavily, lusting after Hisui's body. "Shiki--sama?" "It's okay; please leave―― I beg of you, just for now, please leave me alone." "―― Shiki-sama, if that is what you wish." Hisui's voice trembles. She retreats from the room. -. Time slips by. Simply lying in bed with my body as it is, I lose all sense of time. ―― Did I run Hisui out of my room an hour ago, or was it thirty minutes ago? I can't tell for certain. After I became alone, the clock has advanced three hours. But I can't trust it. The seemingly round clock looks distorted. *wheeze* *wheeze* *wheeze* All I can hear is the wheezing of my breathing. The distorted clock claims it is now noon. The examination is around two, so I can protect my sanity by myself for a bit longer. ―― Well, but then― If I am alone, then those "headaches" will return and they may rob me completely of all my reason. "Excuse me." Silently closing the door, Hisui enters my room. Hisui enters carrying a tray with a glass of water and some sort of medicine. "―― Hisui. It isn't time for the examination yet, right?" "Yes. I just thought that you might be thirsty." She locks the door with metallic clinking and draws close to my bed. ――― Locks, the door――? "Can you raise your body by yourself? If you can't, then I will most humbly give you assistance." "No, I'm not thirsty. Besides, why did you come here? I told you to leave me alone." "I refuse. I cannot leave you alone like this." After she says this in a distinct voice, she places her hands on my shoulders. "Hey---Hisui?" "Please, if you are unable to stand by yourself, just say so." "!?" She quickly lifts up my body with a strong pull. Hisui takes the medicine and forces it into my mouth. "Please drink. This is a special medicine that my sister made for you." "N――!" The water pours down my throat. "N-,n,n-――!" ―― Maybe it's because she is mad about before, but she is acting rather forceful. She moves like a precise, flexible doll without a will of her own. "Ha---puhaa――! What are you doing, all of a sudden! Of course I've been taking it out on you, but, this, is too-" Hu-h? My body falls to the bed. ―― I can't put any power to my movements. I have no strength, but I don't feel bad, either. Rather, it's more of a feeling of inconvenience. My body starts to heat up from its very core. ---This is, like. That feeling of being alive. How long has it been since I've felt like this "―― I can't believe it. Somehow, like this--" I feel like I could even walk. "You must not. My sister has told me that it would not work unless you slowly regain your senses of the body. Please, rest some more, Shiki-sama." "Eh―― Ah, okay. If you say so, but, what are you going to do?" "I will take care of your body, Shiki-sama." With that, Hisui takes her cool fingers and crawls them on my chest. "--!" I shiver. Like the recovering body, what's been quieted down surfaces again. "Hisui――! If you want to take my pulse, use my arm――!" "No, I am not taking your pulse. I am checking your heartbeat." "N!" Ice― Her cold fingers move from my chest towards my stomach. Sliding downwards. From the opening in my shirt, her fingers feel my skin. "H,H, Hisui――!" "Please be quiet. If you move around, the medicine will not work." "Eh---for― real――?" "Yes. It is a medicine that is easily dissolved by your body, so if you move, it will dissolve quickly. My sister has told me that this will dilute the effects of the drug and that you should let the drug dissolve slowly for its full effect." "U―― If Kohaku-san said so, then I guess it can't be helped." I blush. Hisui's fingers, which normally don't touch men, are now feeling my skin directly. At this rate, I'll--- "H―――― uh?" "Your body temperature is pretty constant. At this rate, you will be unable to think about anything difficult for a while." "―――― What?" What are you― saying  right now   Hisui ? "However, it will take more time, so let's talk to pass the time. ―― Yes. Let's talk about your beloved childhood, Shiki-sama." Still standing, she looks down at me as if she was staring at a dead body in a coffin. "Do you remember? Whenever you would play in the garden, you would always look up at the window I was in. I was always looking forward to that time. Everyone at the mansion treated me as if I didn't exist." "Your eyes would always look at me and speak without words. 'Hurry up and come outside and play with us,' they said. But I didn't leave the mansion. I didn't know how, I didn't even know what that meant." ---Hisui's voice is― far away. Her uninterested voice. Her voice seems to be clear of dark tones, but still "I did not look out the window to find meaning. I just didn't want to be in Makihisa-sama's room, so I was there, the only place I was allowed to be outside of his room. Therefore, it meant nothing to me. The figures of SHIKI-sama and Akiha-sama playing in the garden were no different than the sun and the trees." "---If you. If you had never noticed me, I would have been fine. If you hadn't waved to me or called out to me, who knows how I would have turned out. The way I am now, everything is because of you." Saying that, Hisui smiles happily. "Every day, I looked forward to that time. I would always see you looking for me. Every day, those eyes would tell me to come play, to come outside. ―― Isn't it funny? Because you were there, I noticed for the first time that I had legs that could take me outside." "Are you listening Shiki-sama? Even though the drug is working, please don't space out on me. Since I was a child, I have always wanted to talk to you like this." ―― Hisui's mouth is distorted. Happy. Her lips make the shape of a smile as if she is having fun. "I really did look forward to it. But it wasn't for you to take me outside. I knew that such a thing was impossible." "I would have been fine if I never knew what hope was. Then I never would have known despair either. But you would always tell me with your eyes how simple it was, how much better it would be if I went outside. ―― Really, I would always look forward to the afternoons when you would play outside. You were the only one I could let my emotions out on. ―― No matter what that emotion was, I bet you didn't know how much I thought about you everyday." ---I can't hear her voice very well. She just keeps talking. My mind is hazy, and I can't quite grasp what she's saying. Just thatwhat Hisui is saying right now is a curse. "A-" When I come to, my whole body is burning. My pulse races, and my veins feel as if they will explode. Even though I was that close to death, I feel vitality returning to my organs. "Hhot, Hisui, it's really---" Hot. It's so hot, I'm going to go crazy. These sheets. These sheets are in the way. These pajamas are too hot too. I feel as if I am wearing a winter coat in the summer. "Haa, gah" But I still can't move. This body that hasn't been able to move for three days, can't start working that easily. "Hisui, what is happening to me――!? I, I'm hot, but my body won't move――!" "---Yes. No matter how much energy is restored, you are losing energy at a higher rate. Therefore, this drug can only restore your energy in this small part of you." Hisui says this, and― Hisui takes the fingers on my stomach and moves them downward. Down there, which has been standing up from before, is what you could say is a pillar of myself. "-!" My back starts to arch slightly. Hisui's fingers crawl over the hot, hard bulge and slowly pull my pants down. "―― ! Don't taunt me like this――! Why---I kept you away so this wouldn't happen, but if you keep doing this, I'll---" I can't hold back my lust― any longer. "―― Shiki-sama. I will now tend to your― lower parts." Her face flushed with embarrassment, Hisui says such an unbelievable thing. "--" I want to tell her to stop, but I can't say anything. I can't let her do this. But---with a mind of its own, my shaft starts to twitch, asking for Hisui's fingers. "--What― am I thinking!?" I try to shout, but it only comes out as a whisper. I can hear my blood pounding. I remember the beautiful arms and legs of that violated doll in my dreams. "Shiki-sama. Are you holding back?" "Of course I'm holding back――! For me to do this― to you---" "Shiki-sama. The way your body is, you shouldn't strain yourself." Hisui's fingers start to gently caress me. Is there preliminary semen coming out already? A loose strand pools between her fingers. "Please relax. Let's do something that you wish for. ―― I really don't want to see you stressing your body and heart, Shiki-sama." "--" That's---maybe that is the truth, but. ―― Hot. Damn it, so hotI can't sort out things calmly. "Shiki-sama. Please let me make you feel a little more alive." Hisui's fingers grasp my shaft firmly. "We have that kind of power. If we receive some of your bodily fluids, we can help you just a bit. ―― So please, don't say anything and just bear this." I can feel her hot breath on "me". Hisui's breath, unlike her fingers---is roasting hot, almost burning. "―― Then, please excuse me." After saying this with a hesitating voice, she lowers her face towards my groin. Is it because of the medicine, or maybe her fingers? Unlike the rest of my body, which is completely unable to move, my rod is fully erect. A hot, erect pillar of flesh. Her fingers continue to touch it with a bit of uneasiness. "――! H,Hisui, this is---" I start to tell her this is wrong, but before I can― Hisui holds the base of my penis with both of her hands, as if embracing something extremely important to her. "Nn――" Hisui takes a deep breath. And then, a different feeling of heat comes down on me. --My body ignites. I've never felt this sensation before. My heart starts to pound heavily. Hisui's tender lips enclose my tip. With soft pressure, she slowly begins to suck. "" My mind goes completely blank. I had no idea anything could feel this good. Just watching my shaft vanish between her lips makes my blood boil. "Nn―― ha, n――" Hisui's breath starts to become wild, probably because she's having a difficult time breathing. Her face. Just looking at her like that, my reason crumbles away completely. Her blushing face as she earnestly tries to do her duty. Her fingers move around awkwardly, just desperately gripping my engorged member. "Ha―― n, na―― n." The breath from her nose and mouth tickles my tip. "--" It starts to tickle, and it makes me feel more pleasure. Is it Hisui's saliva, or maybe my own liquids? My shaft starts to get covered in sticky fluid. My heart pounds. My pulse races even faster than before. Her fingers grip me tightly. Her tongue licks me hesitantly. "Nnha, n ,――" Her inexperienced lips are still weak. But her tongue still caresses the tip of my shaft. Gradually, her tongue becomes more active. "―― Kk―― Hisu― i――!" This sensation shoots up my spine. My heart beats. ―― Just a moment ago, the fact that Hisui is the one doing this set my body afire. But that's ending. Now her action seems like she's got the hang of it, growing more and more confident. "―― Mn―― nna---n――" Hisui starts breathing violently. The sensation of viscous fluid. She uses the tip of her tongue to lick the opening at the head of my penis. "Kha――!" My hips jump a bit. I desperately try to resist the sensation that is welling from my loins to my testicles. "Hisu―― i, stop---" My heartbeat rages in my ears. The hot feelings start to accumulate and redouble― "Nn―― na―― n---" Hisui does not stop. Little by little. Her lips start to creep lower. Thump. "―― N, ―― n, ―― u―― n." Hisui's flowing hair. Hisui's lips, which weren't moving before, start to move up and down. With a slurping noise. Hisui's saliva and my fluids continue sliding up and down beneath her lips "Ah---a,a" A gasp escapes my lips. The feeling of Hisui wrapping me with her mouth. The mixture of pleasure and pain that shoots from my hips, through my back and up to my brain. The sound of gentle slurping. These erotic sounds get louder. Hisui just continues to passionately suck at my shaft. "Nn―― nn,n――――!" Gripping. Hisui's fingers continue to grip me harder. "-A― ha――!" ―― My breathing is out of control. ―― I start to blank out. "A―― n, nmu――" Hisui's breathing almost sounds pained. Her mouth full, the exhalations from her nose flow over my penis. -Thump. My shaft starts to get wet. It's not just that, but Hisui's fingers are wet as well. Dirty. Those beautiful fingers are covered in two kinds of fluid, hers and mine. -My― heart― is pounding― It feels like it's telling me to go crazy. "―― Nn―― Shiki―― sama." Hisui suddenly draws away from my rod― maybe the smell is too much for her. A string. A thin thread stretches from her lips, connecting the two of us. The sound of breathing. Wild breathing. From me, not Hisui. --Thump. My heart is about to burst. My body is about to shut down. This---this kind of pleasure― I don't want it. Not enough. This is not even close to enough. "―― Shiki-sama―― are, you feeling― better――?" Hisui's voice is full of hesitation. *pant*―― *pant*―― *pant*―― Still unable to move even my arms, I just breathe in and out. "―― If that felt good―― then please, bear― just a little more." Taking a deep breath, Hisui once again lowers her head. "Nn-" Once again, she starts to caress me with the inside of her mouth. -My heart thumps. Thump. Thump. Thump. Thump--! "―― Not― enough――" "Ah―― Shiki― sama――?" "Hisui―― deeper――" So saying. My arms grab her head. "――! Shiki-sama, what are――!" "Hi― sui" I put some power into my arms. And I forcibly push her head down. "Nn-!?" Her lips make a wet, sliding sound. "Nn---,n― n!" Hisui tries to pull her head back. But― my arms do not allow her. "Hisui---more---" With ragged breath, I say such a selfish thing. "Nnha,n,ah---!" Hisui tries to breathe. Before, it was Hisui embracing me with her mouth. But now it's different. Now I thrust my whole shaft into her mouth. "Nn-n, n!" Opening her mouth, Hisui manages to take it all in. There is no resemblance to the enthusiasm of before. Now it feels like she is just trying to escape. "―― Hisui―― does this hurt?" "Nnn, mu." Her breathing flows against my shaft. I start to feel the pressure of her teeth. "I see. Then I'll let go." I pull my hands off her head. "Nn―― ha, ah." Breathing painfully, Hisui tries to lift her face. "No. Hisui---move right there." Hisui freezes. "---" Confused, Hisui hesitates and then. "N―― nn,ha――" Hisui swallows me deeper and starts to move. Thump. "Nn―― mu, nn, n――" Back and forth. Her burning lips run up and down. "A―― n, n, Ah――" Instead of breathing in air, she's breathing in me. The sensation of being inside a woman's mouth. "Nn---na,n" Hisui is no longer able to hold her saliva in. It's flowing much more than before. Sliding― Sliding. Hisui's dirtied face. "HaHisui, it's really" Matching Hisui's sliding, I start to move my hips. I hit the back of her throat. "Ha---n, nnn---!" It must really hurt her as she starts to bite down. Hisui bites with enough power to leave tooth marks. "!" Trying to escape those teeth, I move my hips even more. "nn-!" Her gripping fingers. Her hair sways wildly. She continues to caress me. " n―― Hisui, more――!" "Nn-a, Shiki― sama---!" I hear her voice. The blood pounds in my shaft. Opening her mouth, she takes it all in. The sensation of being sucked, up and down. "Nn,――!" My semen starts to well up. "Ha,a---I'm going to come, Hisui――!" Hisui starts to pull back. But my arms move on their own. I start to come. I don't try to hold back, and I don't let Hisui escape. In my ecstasy, I release everything into Hisui's mouth. "NnAh,nn--!!" Splash. "N,n!" Hisui tries to pull back with a pained expression. But my arms do not allow it. I force her to take everything. "Ah, ah, ahh--!" At the same time, her throat starts to move. *pant*―― *pant*―― *pant*―― With that, I let her go. Breathing. Hisui collapses onto the floor. Wild breathing. Both of us are breathing desperately. Thump. But― this isn't good. I'm not satisfied with this. My body can now move. It looks like I can move. Because of that, this isn't enough. Thump. "Shiki-sama―― How are you feeling?" Hisui asks me this while sitting on the ground. I--

*s403
"――――" I don't know what to say. Even though I'm only a little better than yesterday, at least now I feel alive. But, after making Hisui do that---making her drink that completely, maybe it was just better if I stayed like that. "--" Hisui straightens out her clothes and moves away from the bed. "―― Hisui―― I" "Shiki-sama. Please do not tell anyone of this. ―― I do not want you to say it even to myself." "---" ―― Of course, Hisui must hate what she just did enough to not even want to be reminded of it. "Shiki-sama. This was something that I did on my own. Please think that nothing happened. Otherwise, I will be unable to serve you any longer." "---" I don't know how to respond. I don't have words to apologize to her, and I don't have the words to thank her either. "Well then, please excuse me." "A―――" Hisui leaves. All I can do is watch as she does so. ―― It's two o'clock. Even though it's time for my checkup, Hisui probably won't come. ―――― *sigh* All I can do is sigh. Just how did all of this happen? Even though it was Hisui that started all this, what was I doing holding her head and coming in her mouth like that?

*s404 [WARNING: H]
It's not enough. *pant* *pant* *pant* I'm out of breath, but― It's not even close to being enough. Being done this much. Being done this much by Hisui, I can't let it end now. "---Shiki-sama――? You should be able to move your body now――" "-" Hisui comes a little closer. Her face sets it off. Pulling on her arms, I yank her onto the bed. "Ah---Shi, Shiki-sama, what are you――!" "What does it look like? After doing all that---are you going to say no, Hisui?" "N, No――! I was just trying to help you, and---" Hisui tries to escape. But that doesn't last very long. With her back against the pillow, she realizes that she can't move back any further. Thump. My heart races. All my blood vessels are ordering me. VIOLATE HER Do it. These words echo in my head. "It's hot---I'm so hot I could die, Hisui." "No――! Please calm down, get a hold of yourself, Shiki-sama――!" Thump. It's impossible. What made me this way, what did this to me, what I now want, what made me want it? All of it― is what Hisui did to me. *pant* *pant* *pant* *pant* "Sto―― Please stop, Shiki-sama――!" I can hear her voice. But― her voice― has the opposite effect. "Hisui!" And just like that, I get on the bed and keep her from escaping. "N, Hwa――!" Hisui's voice is bewildered, and her body starts to shake. I don't care about foreplay. I tug her clothes out of the way and thrust my burning organ into her. ―― She is somewhat wet from before, so I slide in rather easily. The sound of me burying myself in Hisui's tender body is like ripping meat. "A---n, n―― ah―――" Hisui doesn't even resist. All she does is surrender herself shamefully, blushing brightly as I start to move. "―― This is wrong, Shiki-sama―― If― Akiha-sama finds, out" Even though she refuses me with her words, her body tells a different story. She lifts her skirt so it won't get dirty, and, in my mind, to give me better access. "I don't care---you― are the only one― right now---" I thrust even deeper. I continue to bury myself in her. "Nn-!" Hisui's legs start to shake. "Nn―― Ah, it's coming in――" As if they are not hers, Hisui lifts her legs and stares at where we are connected. "Ah---" Deeper― Deeper. "It's hot―― Hisui, inside of you―― so hot――" This isn't figurative. Her passage is really, extremely hot. She tightens around me. Her muscles squeeze me tenderly, and her contractions draw me deeper and deeper. "U,――!" As if to resist, I start to pull back, then push back in. "Nnn---! Shiki-sama, there!" Hisui's hips start to float. Her insides tighten even harder. Her tender contractions become softer and pull me even deeper. "Hawait, Hisu― i" Strange. Hisui's insides are― terribly strange. "Ho―― t, it's so hot, yet---?" It feels so good. It almost feels as if countless fingers are caressing me. Those fingers are hot, delicate, and moving as if wrapping around every millimeter of me. "Kaah." I don't even need to thrust. Just being inside her gives me pleasure enough. "A---Shiki― sama―― please, move――" She whispers as if ashamed. Thump. My heart starts to throb. That's right. I'm the one who said it wasn't enough. This ordinary pleasure is not enough. If this is enough pleasure right now, then there should be pleasure beyond imagination in what lies ahead. "Ha---a, k---" I move my hips. Fighting against Hisui's tightness inviting me in to her depths, I pull out, then thrust back in. "Nn――!" Hisui's body starts to pull away. In response, my body presses harder. Sliding― sliding. "Ha---n, na, ah, ah――!" Sliding on her juices, I thrust again and again and again. Her hips glide with mine. "A--hwa, ah, Shiki― Sa---n――!" She tries to take me in completely. "K, haa, ah, aaah." Her swaying hair. Her eyes, drenched with passion. "---Ah, aah, ah." My hips rock back and forth. I can think of nothing else. Once. I start to feel everything well up inside me and I hold it back. Twice. Even as I resist, Hisui tightens her hold on me. Three times. Hisui's insides even take away my will to hold back. "Ha---ah, ah." I don't even know whose voice is whose. Only for the time being, I am literally drowning in Hisui's body. *pant* *pant* *pant* *pant* "―― No, that's wrong――!" This isn't like that. I'm just doing this because I love her. "Definitely---" I start to forget myself as I thrust. "Definitely," Within her depths, I can forget what I am, so I keep thrusting. "Definitely, I am---!" "Na――!" Hisui's head falls back. "Ha,a! Shiki-sa― ma---it― hurts――!" "I'm different! Different! Different――!" I keep thrusting. Hisui's body shakes uncontrollably. "St---Sto― p, please Shiki-sama――! If this, keeps up, I'll---!" I can't hear her. Lost in this pleasure. The heat of pre-climax. "N, a, Aa――! Stop, please, this――!" Hisui's back begins to arch. Her arms reach out, and she tries to push me away. ---Thump. "Not done yet――! You started this, so why!?" I don't care. I don't care if I break her. My mind is burning. Burning. Flaring. Erupting. Frying. Roasting. There is nothing left. "Shiki, Shiki-sa---please, stop――!" *pant* *pant* *pant* Thrust, thrust, thrust. Hisui keeps struggling. But I keep thrusting. "Ha-a, n―― ah-" She stops trying to push me away. "Haa―― haha, hahaha, ha――!" Hisui collapses, powerless. She welcomed me so eagerly before, but now lies exhausted and twitching on the bed. "―― Sto―― p―― please, forgive― me――" A weak, faltering voice. And then, Ha HAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA I shiver. An order enters my brain. "Fine, I'll end it right here---drink up, Hisui――!" I pull out of her. She drips fluid all over as I pull my rock hard cock out of her abused hole. "Here, you like it, don't you――!" Tearing back her clothes, I expose her small breasts. I start to rub myself between her perfectly shaped mounds. "Nn-!?" I push on the back of her head and make her swallow it. "Ha,n,nnn!" This is entirely different from before. Dripping and mixed with her love juices, I thrust it into her mouth. "A---n, No――!" "Here I come, Hisui――!" The sensation shoots along my body. Squeezed between her breasts, I release the heat that was boiling inside of me. "Na!" I shoot it into her face. My squirting come splatters onto Hisui. "A---ha, ha――!" Holding back tears, Hisui spits out what was in her mouth. She sticks her tongue out, showing it to be painted an impure white. Erotically, some of our mingled fluids trickle from the corner of her lips. "A―― ha, a--" Hisui is drained of all energy. "Ha―― Haa―― ha." It looks like I can still move. Not being able to resist, Hisui becomes a doll which I hold onto as I move. My tool still moves around. "Ha―― A, ah." Still― overflowing. The sticky whiteness continues to pour. "A-ha." It flows from her breasts and dirties even her neck. "Ha." And― it is completely finished. Both my lust and the whirlpool of energy that was flowing in my body. As if my earlier recovery never happened, my body once again returns to its pitiful state. "――――" My body― does not move. ―― I'm able to move a little bit, but the aliveness I had before disappears. ―― Probably because I climaxed so hard. It seems that the energy I gained was sucked up by Hisui. "--" Hisui straightens her clothes and moves away from the bed. I---can't say anything to her. Even though I was so excited---I did such terrible things to her. There's no way I can give her any justification. "―― Hisui―― I" "Shiki-sama. Let's forget about this." "---But Hisui, I" "I've already forgotten about it. So― please do the same, Shiki-sama." "---" I don't know how to respond. I don't have words to apologize to her, and I don't have the words to thank her either. "Well then, please excuse me. I'm repeating myself, but please don't tell Akiha-sama or my sister about this." "A―――" Hisui leaves, or rather, escapes the room. ―― But that's understandable. After going through that, she probably doesn't want to be in this room for even a second longer. ―― It's two o'clock. Even though it's time for my checkup, Hisui probably won't come. *sigh* All I can do is sigh. How did all of this happen? Even though Hisui started it and my body got so excited, I didn't have to force her down and treat her that roughly.

*s405
"-" I have a headache. ―― I don't quite understand how, but what I did with Hisui helped me regain some of my strength. But in exchange, my headaches have gotten much worse. ―― I hear a knock at the door. It's probably―― Kohaku-san, I suppose. "Please excuse me, Shiki-sama." "-Eh?" The one who came was Hisui. "---" Hisui wordlessly performs her usual check-up. Because I haven't slept today, I'm not bleeding. I'm not using an IV, so after taking a few measurements and changing the sheets, she gives me some water and medicine. "---" The whole time, there is nothing but silence between us. ―― After doing what I did, I can't look at her in the face. I think Hisui is like that too, but Hisui probably still dutifully and methodically carries out all her normal tasks because of her role as a servant. And all of a sudden. "Shiki-sama, how is your body's condition?" She talks to me. "Um, I, uh-" As far as my condition goes, I can move a little more than before because of what happened earlier, but--- "Shiki-sama, is there something the matter? Your face appears very red." "My, my face is red― because---Hisui, you―" "Yes? What did I do?" Hisui tilts her head to the side questioningly. "Uh-" Damn it, I can't just say it. And I still haven't been able to apologize for before. "That is, I―― I'm sorry about before. You must have been embarrassed to do it, but I treated you a bit rough." "Ah――――" Hisui lowers her gaze as if embarrassed. I suppose she remembers now. I guess that's not the reason. "―― Do not worry, Shiki-sama. I must apologize as well, for doing that to your body without asking. It is only natural if you end up hating me." "Wha---hate you? I have no reason to hate you――! No matter what happens, I won't hate you. ―― Besides, it is only natural if you end up hating me." My whole body becomes heavy as I say this. Even though I'm the one who said it, it should be about time Hisui is getting tired of hearing me. I bet she's remembering what happened before and hating me even as I speak―― Huh? ―― That's odd. Why is Hisui smiling so happily? "―― Hisui. Why, are you smiling?" "Shiki-sama, your words and mine were the same. I thought it was amusing." Hisui giggles, as if it is really funny. ―― My head starts spinning. Hisui's rare smile is so cute, I'm about to go crazy. That might be why. Her smile looks incredibly scary to me. "―― Anyway, I haven't said thanks yet. Thank you for before, Hisui. ―― The, method was a little problematic, but thanks to you my body is better. I may even be able to walk a little." "Eh---ah, yes. Even though what I did is a small thing, I am happy that I could be of some use." Hisui looks at me directly. ―― Seeing her like that makes me remember what happened, and I start to get a little uncomfortable. "―― But, about before, I don't think it was really appropriate. I'm happy, but it's not quite right." "―― Not quite, right?" "Yes. That's, something that both parties should agree to― and even though you're a servant, you don't have to go that far―" "I understand. As you say, I will ask for your permission before I touch you next time." ―― No, you're missing my point― "Please excuse me. If anything happens, please call for me, Shiki-sama." Hisui walks out of the room. "―― She's really calm――" I'm a bit taken aback. Just seeing Hisui's face makes me blush, but Hisui acted just like she always does. "――――" I don't get it. Something doesn't feel quite right and lingers in the back of my mind. "A--" When I open my eyes, the day has already passed. ―― It seems I fell asleep, but I don't remember when. *pant* *pant* *pant* *pant* My breathing is ragged. My body is burning. My body. My body feels like it's roasting, erupting into flames. "―― Wa―― ter――" My throat is thirsty. It's so hot, I can't even speak. I can't even call for Hisui or Kohaku-san. "―――" My empty room. I start to feel down staying in this for so long. This restless room. This room I don't remember. ―― This room, it feels, like it isn't my room. "―― Wa―― ter――" I'm thirsty. Water. I should go back to my house, and quickly, get some water to drink. I gasp for air. Placing my hand on the wall and feeling like I'll collapse any second, I manage to drag myself out of my room. I have trouble breathing. ―― What is this? I haven't even walked thirty feet and already my heart feels like it will explode. I need more air. Still, I have to go. I might die if I walk anymore. But if I don't get any water to drink, I'll probably die anyway. Then, I'll walk and go get some water. I can't just stay and lounge on my bed forever. *pant*―― *pant*―― *pant*―― I go out into the courtyard. Waterthis, isn't, the kitchen though. ――― *pant*――― *pant* I enter the woods. ―― Soon. Soon, I will be able to be at a place with water, a familiar place. *pant* ―――― *pant* With the fever getting to me, I arrive at the place. White, sunshine. Even though the day is already ending, the entire world is white. This place is burning hot like a desert, and I squint my eyes since the world is so white. ―― Thud. I hear a noise. ―― It comes from the detached house. ―― Someone. ―― Someone's inside? Opening the sliding door very slightly, I peer in from the porch. Inside, I see the figures of Akiha and Kohaku. They look a little strange. I hear the swishing of an obi being removed. -What―? Without a word, Kohaku pulls down her kimono and bares her breasts. Kohaku stands there with a blushing face, but does not move. Akiha presses her lips against the bared white chest. Tension. Kohaku looks down at her bare chest, and Akiha crouches so that she is burying her face in Kohaku's breasts. A thin red drop makes a line down her breast. Akiha's throat starts to move, swallowing something. What---what is she drinking? There's no need to ask; I already understand. Akiha, she's drinking, Kohaku's blood ―― I feel dizzy. My mind goes blank. All I can do is stare at the strange event happening before my eyes, like in a daydream. Suddenly, Akiha opens her mouth with her arms still around Kohaku. "About the killer―― what do you think, Kohaku?" "Let's see. I think there can be no mistake that it's the work of SHIKI-sama." What. "I---I suppose so. I have no idea how he can walk around with that body, but we can't leave him alone. The impurity of the Tohno blood that has awakened must be cleansed by those of the Tohno blood." Just, what are they saying? "Then, Akiha-sama." "Yes. As the head of the Tohno family, I will kill my brother." Those words send chills down my spine. Akiha isn't playing around. Even Kohaku-san nods seriously. "Then, Akiha-sama. We should let Hisui-chan know about this too." "You're right. ―― But we shouldn't need her help. My brother can't move around as he likes, so we should be enough to kill him." *pant* *pant* *pant* My breathing gets out of control. "You understand, Kohaku? Don't let Nii-san pick up on any of this. It will all be over in a few days, so let's not trouble him." "Yes, I understand. He can't even move from his bed by himself, so he will never find out." -*pant* *pant* *pant* My fingers shake uncontrollably. Nausea permeates my being and I almost pass out. But, I can't pass out here. -I have to get away. If I pass out here, I'll surely be killed. If they find out I was watching them, they'll kill me right here. I struggle for breath. ―― I don't understand. I don't understand why they would want to kill me. Even my brain trying to understand doesn't work because of the fever. ―― I don't understand. This, has to be a bad dream. --Dream Dream--? Yes, this is a dream. Like always, this has to be just another one of my nightmares. Then, I have to wake up quickly. Before this horrible vision consumes me, I have to wake up and return to my normal life "Ah-" ―― Somehow, I make it to my room. Now---yes, now I, should lock the door-- "Shiki-sama." "---" ―― I don't know how long she has been there, but Hisui is standing in my room. "What are you doing? In your condition, walking is very dangerous." "Hi―― sui." "Please, lay down. If you push yourself, Akiha-sama will scold me." "Akiha―― will scold――?" Why would she get in trouble if I went outside? ―― No, I understand perfectly. Akiha realizes that I'm the killer. So she plans to lock me in my room, and when night comes, kill me. "Please leave, Hisui." "Shiki-sama――?" "I won't let anyone in this room. Even you, no one will ever come in again――!" "Shiki-sama---kyaa!" I don't know where I got the strength, but I push her out into the hallway. Then, I shut the door and lock it. "Shiki-sama---!? Shiki, sama, please open the door, Shiki-sama――!" She knocks on the door. Ignoring it all, I crumble to the floor. Pai, n. It sticks inside my brain. The poison permeates every pore in my body. Every time I take a breath, the mold invades my whole body. I can't move freely. Something other than my organs or my functions, but something more from the core, like my very own energy, seems to be flowing out of my body. My heart has an invisible pipe sticking out of it. My "life" is flowing along this pipe to him. -It, hurts. So I can't make it. No matter how hard my body tries to recover, he takes away everything. So unless I take in something from the outside world, I can't live. Intravenous drip. Nutrient supplement. Injection. Sedative. Moisture. Blood. Reason. Intelligence. Feelings. Memory. Sight. Sound. Taste. Touch. Smell. Bodily fluids. Love. Impulse. --Ha―― a These drugs, all they can do is barely keep me alive. This isn't healing me. If there's something that will help me move, it's Knock. Knock. The sound wakes me up. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. "―― Sh―― ut, up!" Placing my hand on the wall, I manage to stand up. My own wheezing fills my ears. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. Knock Knock. "Nii-san! Please open the door, Nii-san." Akiha is banging on the door. ―― That's right. I locked it, so no one can get in.

*s406
"―― Why― did I lock it――" My thoughts start to move through a haze. That, was because "" That's right. I locked it so Akiha wouldn't get in. "Nii-san――! I know you're up. You have to get your examination, so why did you lock the door!?" Bam bam. She knocks harder. Akiha frantically calls me from outside in a bitter voice. "Please open the door already! You haven't had your evening IV, do you want to die!?" The pounding on the door doesn't stop. ―― That's only natural. It's not good for Akiha if I shut myself in this room like this. As long as I'm doing this--Akiha will not be able to kill me. "Nii-san――!? Hey, are you listening to me, Nii-san――!?" Bam, Bam. ―― I don't really mind the knocking, but I cannot stand having to listen to her voice. "Shut--up――――!!" "Eh--?" I hear her gasp from the other side of the door. "Shut― up? ―― Nii-san, I am only worrying about you---" "―― I don't care. I'm not coming out. If you're really worried about me, then just go away." "Wha--" "Do you get it? I'm not ever coming out. I won't--let you--kill me――!" Thud. I hit the door. ―― The other side of the door becomes a frozen silence. --And after that― "―― Nii-san, just what do you mean? Who told you I would kill you?" "―― Just go away――! I'm not a killer, I'm still sane――!" "I can't believe itNii-san, you are already pulled in this much?" Her words are filled with surprise. I sense her step back from the door. "―― I understand. Nii-san, you are exhausted right now, so I will come back and see you later." "--Shut up! I won't let you or anyone else in this room――!" "―― Nii-san. I will listen to your words today, but tomorrow, I will make you listen to me. Leaving you by yourself for one day is dangerous enough; I simply cannot leave you alone for two days, otherwise you will surely die. Please wait for just one more day, Nii-san." I hear her footsteps recede. *pant*―― *pant*―― *pant* I can hardly breathe. Just like Akiha said, I will surely die at this rate. *pant*―― *pant*―― *pant* But, it's still better than Akiha killing me. I keep the door locked. I lean against the wall and keep my eyes open so I won't fall asleep.

*s407
"Stop pounding on the door, I'm, going--to open―" Hazily, I open the door. "Nii-san--!" Akiha rushes into the room. Kohaku-san follows behind her. "Nii-san, what were you doing――!? You look terrible, you should be in bed---!" My heart pounds. "That's right, Shiki-san. You haven't eaten since lunch, and you haven't taken your IV. If you keep this up, you will not heal." My heart pounds. "Geez. I don't know what happened, but please calm down. Sleeping on the floor like that― do you want to die, Nii-san?" My heart pounds. Akiha comes closer to take my arm as she says this. Like she said in that detached house. She's coming― to kill me. "Get out!" "Eh---Ni, Nii-san, what are---" "Get out, I said! I won't let you--kill me――!" I push her away. ―― But it's not like I can push her out into the hallway with this body. Akiha simply takes a step back and stares at me. "Nii-san, just what do you mean? Who told you that I would kill you?" Akiha looks at me directly. My heart skips a beat. Her sharp glance feels like she is reading my mind. "―― Just get out――! I'm not a killer, I'm still sane――!" "Killer― Nii-san--you are already pulled in this much?" Her voice is filled with surprise. Akiha walks towards the door on her own. "―― I understand. Nii-san, you are exhausted right now, so I will come back and see you later." "--Shut up! I won't let you or anyone else in this room――!" "――――――" Akiha raises her eyebrows for a second, then starts to leave the room. "―― Nii-san. I will listen to your words today, but tomorrow, I will make you listen to me. Leaving you by yourself for one day is dangerous enough; I simply cannot leave you alone for two days, otherwise you will surely die. Please wait for just one more day, Nii-san." The door shuts. *pant*―― *pant*―― *pant* I can hardly breathe. Just like Akiha said, I will surely die at this rate. *pant*―― *pant*―― *pant* But, it's still better than Akiha killing me. I lock the door. I lean against the wall and keep my eyes open so I won't fall asleep.

*s408
―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. The night is over. A terrible silence. I can't even hear the wheezing of my breathing. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. "" My body doesn't even twitch or move at all. My mind has completely stopped as well. I bet if I look at myself in the mirror, I would look like a puppet with its strings cut. ―― Kn. kno kno, ck. kno, ck. "---Gohu." I cough. ―― I screw up the rhythm again. "Go--ha, ah, ah" ―― Knock. Kno, knock. ―― Knock. Kno kno, ck knock. ―― Knock. Knock knock. Knock. ―― Knock, knock knock, knock. ", ―――, ―――" I get back my rhythm, and I can continue breathing. "-" Being by myself all night caused my body to become really weak. My vision is really blurry. The air touching my skin is painful. My organs are so screwed up now that I can't breathe unless I concentrate. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. "Shiki-sama, are you awake――?" Hisui's voice. ―― How many times is this? Hisui really doesn't grow tired of this at all. "You are awake, are you not? If that is the case, then please at least eat." "―― No. I won't eat what any of you give me." I won't eat anything. I can't trust anything that comes from this house. Food. Water. Medicine. It seems like everything is a poison to kill me. "―― Shiki-sama, I will place your food here. After I leave, please open the door and eat it." ―― Hisui's presence recedes. "―――" I bang my head against the wall. ―― How many times have I ignored Hisui like this? ―― Hisui. Hisui is different from Akiha and Kohaku-san. Maybe Hisui is not trying to kill me. "―――" But, that is just a fantasy. Hisui tried to lock me in this room. Like right now, she came to my room to look after me, keeping me trapped in this room. "Ha, ah." ―― This is no good. I know my thoughts are just paranoia. But my mind won't return to normal. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. ―― Knock, Knock Knock, Knock. My mind is foggy and my body pulses with pain. My throat is so dry that it feels like I will die if I don't drink water. ―― In spite of all that, I still keep the door locked.

*s410
――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――――― I can't hear the annoying sound of the clock anymore. Knock, Knock. The rhythm of my breathing has gone totally erratic and I can't fix it. ―― It's deathly cold. If it's this cold, I want to stop caring about everythingI feel like sleeping. Knock Kno, Knock. Kno, Kno, Knock. Kno Kno Kno, Kno Kno. Kno, Kno, Kno---Kno. Kno, Kno Kno, Kno-Knock. kno-,,,,,,knock. ,,,,---Kno kno, knock knock. "" I think I hear a knocking sound. Maybe it's Hisui. But my body doesn't move anymore. Tohno Shiki, will live forever in this cage, and no one will kill Tohno Shiki―

*s409 [WARNING: H]
―― The knocking begins once again. Knock knock, knock knock, repeating. "Shiki-sama, your food has gotten cold." Her voice sounds sad. "―― Akiha-sama and Nee-san have gone out and will not return today. We are the only ones in the mansion right now." Does she want to tell me to come out? "Shut up――! I told you to leave me alone. Why can't you understand that, Hisui―― !?" "" I hear a gasp. Her presence recedes. ―― Yet again, the knocking continues. Her presence recedes. ―― We repeat this cycle countless times. "Ha--ah, g--" ―― Pain. The hunger is nothing. But thirst is killing my burning body. "" ―― Just what am I doing? Lying crumbled against the wall, hugging my broken body. The closed window, the locked door. "--" ―― Come to think of it, a long time ago― It feels like something like this happened before too. That was― How long ago was that? When I was just a small kid, taken to new surroundings and not being used to the new people, I locked myself up in my room. I hated everything and I didn't want to talk to anyone. During that time, there was a girl that always knocked on the door. Knock, knock, was the sound. Every time I would ask who it was, the voice would always respond "It's me." "SHIKI-chan, let's play. You'll get moldy if you stay in one place like that." I tell her it's none of her business and make her go away day after day. The knocking sound again. Her presence draws away. ―― That girl came every day. She would always knock, not getting tired of doing so. She would never force me out, but continue to call my name without opening the door. "Why won't you come outside?" I can't go outside. Everyone in the mansion, they all see me as the enemy. "That's not true. Everyone wants to like you, SHIKI-chan." But I can't believe her. My own father believed that, and was killed by Tohno Makihisa. "―― I see. No wonder you can't trust anyone." That's right. So it's easier for me to be alone. "But, you will just be yourself all the time. Being by yourself is no fun." I don't care. This is better than getting killed. Better than being tricked. It's better to be alone and trick myself instead of dying. "Geez. I understand, so you can ***** me. Then you can come outside, right?" Her words then. I― can't remember exactly what they were. With her voice, that girl said I could do what? Knock knock. Hisui really doesn't tire of this. Her surprising endurance reminds me of that childhood memory. "―――――?" I don't hear her footsteps. She doesn't seem to have walked away. "―――― Hisui?" There is nothing but silence on the other side of the door. Hisui is just standing quietly on the other side. Time passes. Hisui's presence doesn't move. All she does is wait by the door. "―― Why will you not come outside, Shiki-sama?" ―― That's obvious. Since I can't trust anyone anymore, I'm being by myself. Neither Akiha nor Kohaku, not even I can be trusted, so I can't do anything but lock myself away. ―― Yeah, I finally realize it. The thing with Akiha might really be a trivial thing. I am trying to be alone so that I can lock myself up, as I might be the killer. "―― No one? Are you saying you can believe in no one, Shiki-sama?" ―― That's right. Therefore, there is no reason for her to worry about me. It's wrong for her to worry that much about me, the one wanting human blood, the one who violated her body so roughly. "―― Hisui. Just go away. It's easier for me to be by myself. This way I won't be a burden to anyone." "That is a lie. That― that is not fun at all. Shiki-sama, you are telling a lie――!" ―― Her voice actually sounds a little angry. "Shiki-sama. If you say you cannot believe in anyone, please believe in me! So please, listen to me for just now――!" ―― Her voice― she sounds like she is crying. She must be really angry as she's not making any sense. "You can believe in me"? That's backwards. Normally, I have to say "I believe in you." "――― Geez―――" That's just absurd. I thought the only one who'd make that kind of ridiculous argument was that one girl. "―― Believe in what?" "I do not know――! I just know that― I like you, Shiki-sama, which is why I am calling to you like this――!" Thud. She knocks louder than ever before. "―― Shiki-sama, please. Open the door. I know I am powerless, but I do know that it will be better than being by yourself――!" She sounds like she's crying. The tone is different, but it feels similar to what that girl told me back then. "Will you resist again――!? Shiki-sama, you are really in danger like this――! Why--why are you acting like back then――! You promised that when you came back, you would play with everyone, so why――!" The crying voice of a young girl. "Ah――――" I start to remember a little. That's right. Back then, before I was taken to the hospital, I made that small promise. I thought that I would go back to the mansion when I healed, so I just said it without thinking too much. "Shiki-sama---I do not want to lose you right before my eyes, just like before――! So please―― please, open the door―― Shi, ki--" The pounding against the door stops. It seems Hisui has crumbled to the ground in tears. That girl, who would call to me day after day. That energetic, worrying girl that was always by my side. ---Just who? Really, who was she--? "Hisui――!" Even though I shouldn't have any strength left, I somehow manage to stand. Every time I move, I feel like fainting. But the pain is of no concern right now. Hisui. Hisui. Hisui, Hisui, Hisui, Hisui! I drag myself to the door and place my hand on the lock. "―― Yo―― u" My numb fingers don't move as I tell them to, and the lock is difficult to turn. The lock finally clinks loose. The door opens. In front of me, I see the figure of Hisui. "Shiki-sama---you look― terrible." With tears still streaming down her face, Hisui stares at me. But I don't care about my body right now. More than that, I--- "---Hisui. Are you that girl?" "――――――" Hisui doesn't answer. Her silence isn't disagreement, but agreement. "Why? I thought she was Kohaku-san. You even told me yesterday that you were the child in the mansion." "―― Shiki-sama. That was not me. I think Nee-san was helping you out since you were so weak." "Eh" In other words―― The Hisui that I saw yesterday― was really--Kohaku-san――? "―― Then Hisui? You're the one who played with us when we were kids, and Kohaku-san is---the one who was always in the mansion?" "――――" "Why――? I don't understand. Just why are the two of you acting like you traded places?" "―― We never intended to deceive you. I think I became calmer after you were adopted by the Arima family. Nee-san tried to cheer me up by acting very happy, and then, we gradually traded our roles." "But why―― why did it happen――? Hisui―― you were always so energetic." "―― That is not true. I am naturally not active. But when you were there, I tried to follow you as hard as I could." "―― But, I never should have done that. Since I took you out into the garden, you had the accident." I---all I could do was watch in fear as you were killed before my eyes. All I could do was stare at your blood-soaked body. I couldn't even cry, or call for help. ―― Since that time, I was unable to understand myself. No matter how I tried, I could not remember how I acted, or how I smiled." "―― When you were dying, I could not do anything. I could only watch. It was as if I was just a doll. So---I thought― that maybe it would be better if I was just a doll. Maybe I put a curse on myself. Before I knew it, I became silent just like Nee-san. ―― Nee-san took my place, doing the work I could not do, smiling because I could not." "―― Wait, Hisui. What you're saying, I don't really---" Understand, is what I wanted to say. "What do you mean I almost died? You know about that accident eight years ago?" "―― Yes. You were not injured from a traffic accident. ―― In the courtyard of the mansion, you were killed." "Wha" That's. Not. Right. I'm the one who did the killing. Because I was the one looking down on that blood stained body--- "Ah――" I start feeling light-headed. All the strength drains from my legs and I start to fall--- "Shiki-sama――! Please, hold on――!" ―― In that instant, Hisui wraps her arms around me to prevent me from falling. ""Ah"" ―― Her voice and mine overlap. Hisui stands there, desperately holding on to me. We look like we're embracing each other, and Hisui stands there trembling. "―――― Hisui." I understand. I understand that she doesn't like to come into contact with men. Even now, her body is trembling all over. "---Hisui." Still, I can't let go. I wrap my arms around her. Her warmth. Her soft body. ―― Since we were children, the girl that has always looked after me. Yeah---there can be no more doubt. "Hisui―― Finally, we meet again." With my weak body, I embrace her close to me. "Ah―― Shiki― sama――" Her shaking doesn't stop. But she does not refuse me and wraps her arms around my back. "―― I'm sorry." I don't know what I'm apologizing for. I just feel like there's so many things I have to apologize to her for. "―― Not at all. You do not need to apologize for anything, Shiki-sama." Answering quietly, she takes me to my bed. I rest in bed. My body relaxes a little bit, the bed being much more comfortable than the floor. Hisui covers me with a clean sheet and brings a glass of water. "Shiki-sama, are you able to drink by yourself?" "Yeah, I think I can manage that." Taking the glass from Hisui, I drink my first glass of water in a day. "Nnnh――" The water quenches my thirst. The water seems to fill me completely, up to my fingertips. I give the glass back to Hisui, and I fall down onto the bed. "Shiki-sama!?" "---No, no no, that's not it. I actually feel good, I was just relaxing. My health actually seems better." "Shiki-sama, do not scare me like that. It would not be very surprising if you really did collapse, in your condition." Hisui looks at me with uneasiness in her eyes. ―― That look makes me want to thank her, and also makes me feel regret. "―― Shiki-sama? Does it hurt anywhere? If you are in pain, please do not hesitate to tell me." "No, nothing really hurts right now." ―― Well, my heart hurts. Hisui is worrying about me right now, just like always. All I've done in return to her is to act stupidly. Not even realizing her absolute devotion, all I've done is bring pain to her heart. And that time, when I did those terrible things to Hisui. ―― Even though it turned out to actually be Kohaku-san, I still did them to Hisui. And that's not all. I dreamt about killing people, and in accordance with that, I dreamt about violating Hisui. ―― I, I do not deserve to be cared for by Hisui. "Shiki-sama, was the water not pleasing to you――?" I shake my head no. "That's not it. ―― Um― thanks for everything, Hisui. I never even thought that drinking water could help me this much. But, that's enough. I don't deserve to be treated this well by you." "---Shiki-sama, are you still saying that? I just want to help you, it doesn't matter if you deserve it or not." "No, Hisui. It's not you." ―― Yeah, I'm the one at fault here. Hisui gives me nothing but devotion, but I repay her with cruelty. "―― If you are here with me, I'll probably do something horrible again. So before I do anything, please, leave. ―― I beg you. I--I don't want to hurt you anymore, Hisui." Hisui doesn't say anything. But she has to understand what I am saying. After several seconds of silence, it appears she understands as she raises her head and nods. "I refuse." "―― Yeah, I'm sorry it had to be this way, but―― W, wait a minute. Hisui, what did you just say――?" "I said that I refuse. Those words are not enough, and I cannot leave you alone. Until you can give me a valid reason, I will not follow your command." Hisui responds clearly. "Please tell me the reason, Shiki-sama. Unless you do, I will not move one step." "Wha--" Her eyes are dead serious. I bet she could tell if I'm telling a lie or an excuse, and more than anything---I don't want to lie to her. "―― I get it. So if I tell you the reason, you'll go?" "Yes. If it is something that can convince me, then I will fulfill your command." ――― *sigh* I take a deep breath. ―― Mentally prepared, I open my mouth. "Hisui, I see dreams where I kill people. Every night, I dream that I kill someone I don't know and drink their blood." "―― You see dreams―― Is that supposed to be your reason, Shiki-sama?" "―― No, the thing is, I can't tell if they are dreams or not. Maybe it's that I don't notice, but I might be killing people in reality. ―― Just like the old man. There might be another self in me I don't know about, walking the streets killing people." "Shiki-sama, that--that is impossible. You are acting like the normal Shiki-sama right now." "―― Right now I am. But sometimes, I get these strange thoughts. The dreams I see― they may simply be my memories." ―― And truthfully, I did kill someone eight years ago. I actually have the memory of looking down on that blood-stained kid. "Shiki-sama, please get a hold of yourself. Thinking that you are a blood sucking monster is surely too strange." "―― Yeah, it's strange, but I can't laugh it off. ―― Hisui, you don't know it, but I guess those of the Tohno family are different from normal people. The old man had split personalities, and even Akiha--" ---was sucking Kohaku-san's blood. "Anyway, the people of the Tohno family are not normal. So I'm not normal either. I can't stop myself from lusting after you and Kohaku-san. It's alright now, but if I get that headache again, for sure---I will do something terrible to you, Hisui――!" "---Shiki-sama, Nee-san and I have known all of that from the very beginning." "Huh――? You knew? Knew what?" "That the people of the Tohno are not normal. No, in other words, you were the only one that did not know. Nee-san and I have known that since we were first brought to this mansion." "--Wha―" "But do not think that is anything strange. Nee-san and I, we also carry a power that is not normal. It was because of that power that Makihisa-sama brought us here. Regarding the Tohno family, we know much more than you, Shiki-sama." "Certainly, you can call the Tohno blood abnormal. But, Shiki-sama, that has nothing to do with you. You do not have a split personality like Makihisa-sama nor are you a vampire that sucks human blood. Shiki-sama, you are rather someone closer to Nee-san and I." "―― I'm, closer to you――?" "Yes. You are definitely not a killer. ―― Please, just trust me for now and let me take care of you." "―― No. It still doesn't make a difference to the fact that, um―― I still want you. If you remain here, I'll do something I can't take back." "U---um, about this problem, will you allow me to ask a question――?" "Eh―? Yeah, I don't mind――" "Um, Shiki-sama, um―― Do you not like Nee-san and I――?" "--Huh?" Hisui asks something totally absurd and she starts fidgeting with her fingers. Do I not like Hisui and Kohaku-san? Nothing could be further from the truth. "―― Now look. There's no way I could ever not like either of you. I'm always thankful to Kohaku-san, and to you too―― um, I'm always thinking about how thankful I am to you." She lets out the breath she was holding. Hisui visibly relaxes for some reason. ;翡翠てれ "Then there is no problem. Your condition has put you under a lot of stress. This caused things in your mind to come up into your dreams. That means your thoughts are your true feelings. So it is not odd to feel that way if you have any liking toward us." "Ah―― That's true, but―― ! Even still, it's strange to lust after the both of you like this." "Yes, it is a bit dangerous. But Shiki-sama, you have always endured it, right? Then it will not be a problem. You say that you are dangerous, but you are a stronger person than that. If you have held out for this long, then you can still do so, right? Besides, it is your own will, so in no way do you have a split personality." "Well―― That theory may be right, but――" ―― It isn't that simple. But just seeing that trusting smile, I feel like I have to hold on no matter what. "―― Alright. If you say so, then you can be close by me. I will try to hold myself in check as much as possible." "Ehno. That― that is not exactly what I meant―" Hisui blushes and looks down. "Hm――?" I don't get it. Hisui just looks up at me from time to time with a difficult expression. "Hisui? Did I say something weird?" "――――――――" Hisui just stares at me. "?" I start to feel very uncomfortable. My heart beats faster under tension. I feel uneasy, like I got caught with something and am about to get yelled at for it. --Thump. --Thump. --Thump. --Thump. --Thump. "Cr--" ―― Crap. I start to feel a little dizzy, probably because I'm nervous. "Uu―― " My consciousness starts to flutter. ―― I forgot all about it, but my body isn't in the condition to keep talking. "Ah――――, --" I feel like throwing up every time my heart pounds. Hisui---I hate to do this to her, but maybe it's better if I just sleep right now "Shiki-sama? Are you suffering?" "Eh―― Ah. Just― a little bit. But it's not serious, you don't have to worry about it." "―― No. At this rate, you will surely die. Nee-san said that you may not last until evening." "Wha" I feel a chill as I hear that. ―― It's not like I haven't thought about it. When this body did not heal. I've imagined many times that my weakening body will only end in death. But still,― ―― to hear it from someone else like that sends a chill up my spine. "―――――――" I― don't know what to say. Should I just accept it? Should I deny it? "―――――――" I can't do either. I have felt that my body would die pretty soon― but it just doesn't feel real. It's like I'm just watching the life of some sick person on some sort of television show. "―― Akiha-sama and Nee-san left in order to save you. ―― But they may not make it in time. Even if they are successful, if your body runs out of energy before that, there is no point." "――――― Well, I guess you're right." I don't know what the two of them are doing. She says they are going to save me, but are they searching for something that can cure my condition? But, all that work―― it'll be useless if I die before they get home. "―― But, you know? There is a way to give you energy so you will be able to last until they come back." "―― ?" "―― Please excuse me, but if you would allow it--then I can perform that method." Hisui hesitantly looks at my face. Hisui says there is a method to save me at least for tonight. If that is true, then I have no reason to refuse it. "―― It isn't a matter of allowing, or not. If it can help me even a little bit, then we don't have a choice. I'd like to ask for it myself." "---Yes. Then Shiki-sama, could you please close your eyes for just a bit?" "Close my eyes? Well, sure―― Is this good?" "―― That is fine. Please do not move." I hear her footsteps. The rustling of her clothes tells me she is coming closer. And then― Something shifts onto the bed and I feel something touch my lips. "---" A tender sensation. I feel the warmth of a human body, and it must be Hisui's lips. My body heats up. Her lips hesitantly pressing up against mine. This sensation, and the feeling of her breathing, seems to fill my body like a drug. "Ah" Thump, Thump. With just a kiss, my mind goes totally white. I am pleasantly floating away. All my pain, all my tiredness melts away like ice on a summer day. "Nn――, ―― ah." ―― Hisui exhales. That small contact between us starts to get heavier. "NnHisu, i" ―― I don't know what I'm doing. It's just that her lips feel so good, so I press back with mine. "―― Shiki―― sa--ma――" Hisui hesitantly starts to pull back. I don't want that and I pull her closer to me. "Nn―― ah." Pulling her in, I seek out her lips. "Ha―― n, n――!" Hisui resists slightly as she might be having a hard time breathing. "--Ha--ah." But I can't stop. Her breath. Her lips. Her warmth. It all feels so good. With my eyes still closed, I slip my tongue in between her lips. "N--n!" Unlike before, now she really tries to pull back. I embrace her body to hold on to her, and I continue to seek out her tongue. "A―― n, n――!" If I open my eyes, I bet I'll see her distressed face. If I saw that, I'd let her go right away. And so, instead, I continue blindly twirling my tongue against hers. "N―― a, a――" Our wet tongues intertwine. Just the sensation of my tongue against another's drives me wild. Just the fact that my sensitive tongue is feeling someone else's tongue makes my rational thought about to explode. And because it is Hisui's tongue, it crumbles completely away. "A―― n, n―― ah――" The red, tangled tongues continue their dance. Even though our lips separate, our tongues have become one. ―― This isn't just some sort of metaphor. Our tongues are stuck together with all our saliva. ---I wonder how long that lasted? Before I know it, my body is burning, and Hisui is at the side of the bed adjusting her clothes. Thump. "Ah" Thump. Thump. I'm out of breath. Thump, Thump, Thump. "My―― body― it feels incredibly―― warm." My heart races uncontrollably. ―― Hisui stands by the side of the bed, averting her gaze in embarrassment. Idon't exactly know why she did that. "―― Hisui―― just now, why--" Why did she kiss me? Why did nothing more than a kiss heal me better than any medicine? I don't understand any of it. "―― That is the way I can help you, Shiki-sama." "Help me---but, how?" "I really don't know how. It is just that Nee-san and I can transmit some of our energy to those that we press our bodies against. ―― Um, if we exchange bodily fluids, we are able to recognize that person as someone like us, and it lets us share our energy and amplify their powers." "Wha--what are you talking about?" "Ever since we were born, we have had special bodies. We are not like the Tohno family, but we are special people born from normal people. Makihisa-sama called us 'Synchronizers'." Ah. I think that word was in the old man's journal. "Makihisa-sama brought us here to suppress his increasing 'Tohno self'. We are more suited for amplifying one's power rather than sharing our power. ―― Makihisa-sama synchronized with Nee-san with his human side, and barely stayed sane." "―――――" No, she doesn't have to tell me all this―― but by "The exchange of bodily fluids", it must mean--- " ―― I don't understand completely, but your body― it's sort of like a medicine or something――?" "Yes. Normally, it would not have much of an effect, but now your energy is very low. I believe you will be able to at least return to your normal state even with my powers." "I see. That's why I feel so good right now." I squeeze my hands. "―― Moving. Yeah, I can move――!" My joints are a little stiff, but I can move my body with my own will. Being able to do such a simple thing makes me so happy right now. "Th, thank you Hisui! It looks like my body is back to normal, thanks to you!" I throw my arms up in the air. But, Hisui still looks uneasy. ―― As I think back. Her breath felt so good, I forced Hisui to continue kissing me. "Ah―― I'm, sorry. Your breath, it― felt so good, so I--" "No, what happened before was a good thing―― Um, I don't think I would have been able to transfer any fluids by myself." Hisui looks at me, embarrassed. "But, Shiki-sama, this is a temporary treatment. You will return to your original state soon." "Whafor real? My previous state---you mean back to the way I was?" No. Anything but that. Being able to move like this again, I finally understand. These past few days, my body has been terribly wrong. So now, since I can move again, thinking about my body going back to the way it was sends shivers down my spine. "―― What should I do? I don't ever want to go through that again. Being like a puppet with its strings cut, my head feeling like it's being split open― This time---" Before my body would stop, I think my mind would break first. "Shiki-sama. I do not want you to have to return to the way you were before either. Therefore―― can you― share your body with me a little deeper this time?" With her fingers trembling, she says this while looking directly at me. My heart skips a beat. Sharing our bodies deeper means― Um, it means exchanging our bodily fluids, so that would mean "That's, um--" Hisui remains silent. ―― Should I be the one to say it? "---In other words, I have to make love to you?" Hisui nods wordlessly. "--" My face instantly flushes crimson. The very thought makes me happy, but--- "---No, that's bad. I can't go back to the way I was, but that's bad. Using you like that to make me better, that's just wrong―!" I emphatically refuse her offer. "―――――" Hisui is still silent. It seems more like she's hurt by my words instead of being relieved by my refusal. "No, it's not that I don't want you――! It's just strange. It might help me, but to use your body like that, it's wrong." "―― There is only something wrong with you, Shiki-sama. I understand that you do not want me. But if I do not do this, you will die tonight. So how can you say such things like that?" "Ah---no, that is--" ―― Right. That's why Hisui is suggesting this preposterous "plan". ―― Hisui, who can't even stand contact with the opposite gender, is suggesting this because my life is at stake. So---she says all that for my sake. She's saying I can sleep with her, with like or dislike having nothing to do with it--- "Da" Isn't it okay? I don't want to die either. I mean, all I have to do is sleep with her, and if I don't like that, then there really is something wrong with me. "--" Hisui watches me quietly. Her fingers are still shaking. As uneasy as I am---she is still far more uneasy. But she hides it, and tries to act normally. She is doing so much for me, so why--- "Hisuiis this― alright with you?" "―― Yes. If I can be useful to you, then I will be satisfied." "---No! That's not what I meant, um---" Is she really okay with giving her body to someone she does not love? I― don't like it. I want to sleep with her. I think I love her, and I want to do things for her sake. But those are two different things. Simply put, I don't want to sleep with her because I don't know if Hisui loves me or not. "---Is it okay, Hisui? Giving out your body like that, won't you regret it later?" "―― I do not know. But I just have one request to ask of you." "Request――?" "Yes. Shiki-sama, if you were to like me even just a little bit, just for now---please, think only of that. If you are to love me just for now---I would never regret this." ―― Hisui speaks, still trembling. "-" ―― I'm stupid. I've never felt more stupid than I do right now. "--Hisui. I" ―― What do I mean by "I don't want to if Hisui doesn't love me"? Really---I don't deserve to say that. "---Come here. Right now, I really need you." ―― Hisui draws closer. Reaching out my arms, I draw her towards me. "---But don't get me wrong. Even without my condition, I've always---wanted you the most for all this time." Then. Bringing her down to the bed, I run my fingers across her body. I untie her ribbon and it swishes downwards. "Ah――" Hisui's voice quivers. I pretend I didn't hear her, and I untie the belt of her apron behind her back. "Shiki-sama? Um――" Hisui looks at me with unknowing, uneasy eyes. "Hisui, is this your first time――?" "Ah―― yes. Please, forgive me." Her voice fades to a whisper and her cheeks blush bright red. Quivering, she clenches the sheets as if to fight back her fear. "But Shiki-sama, I―― I was thinking that it might not be necessary to take my apron off―" It doesn't look like she wants to take off her clothes and bare herself. She looks uneasily at me, like a scared rabbit. ―― But that just makes my heart go on fire. "Nope. If you don't take off your clothes, then I won't be able to do anything. ―― Hmm, I wonder how this comes off." Holding onto Hisui from behind, I search for something like a zipper. But I can't seem to find it. "Hey. Hisui, how did you put this on? This― doesn't really look like it can be taken off." "Um―― This is a one piece, so it is difficult to take off in this position." "―― I see. I guess that can't be helped." "Yes. So just like this, um―― I want you to――" "--" Not a chance. If I get this far and still don't get to see her body, I'll kill myself. "No. Hisui, stand up and take it off. If you don't, it'll be a little difficult." "Eh---ah, eh, but, if I do that, I'll be naked." "Yeah. I want to see your body. I can't make love to you with your clothes on, I'll be missing out too much." "Missing out too much―? Shiki-sama――" She looks troubled. Hisui herself is embarrassed, but it seems she is still trying to follow my orders. "Ah――― Y, yes." After some consideration, she quietly stands up. "―― Shiki-sama, can we turn off the lights?" "Hm." That's a big minus. I hadn't realized it, but it's quite dark outside. If I turn off the lights, there's only the moonlight to light up the room. "―― I do not want to otherwise. But if you insist, I will follow your orders. ―― But I might hate you for that, though." "Ah" ―― She's good. She never asks anything for herself normally, but her words strike me where I'm weak. "―― I understand. I'll turn off the lights, so take off your clothes." I flick the switch off. At the same time, I hear her clothes coming off. She must be used to them, as she takes off her maid uniform rather easily. Moonlight provides the only illumination. I can't see her naked body clearly, and I can only see her outline. ---No. Even still, it is more than enough. The curves of her body that were always hidden by her maid uniform can be seen clearly now. Her breasts are not large, but they're not small either. Her perfectly shaped mounds do not look that soft, but are balanced somewhere between those of a girl and those of a woman. Her exquisite breasts are both beautiful and erotic. Her body is slender yet not skinny. Her fragile, delicate, soft looking body. Her femininity, normally hidden, now embraces my senses. "―― Shiki-sama――?" "Ah--sorry. I was just mesmerized by your beauty. Now, come on over, Hisui." I hold out my hand from the bed. After briefly hesitating, she comes toward the bed, looking down. I sit cross-legged on the bed. Hisui does not get on the bed, but stands by the bedside. "―――" Hisui mumbles that she doesn't quite know what to do. "-" My heart pounds furiously. I have the uneasy feeling like I'm about to do this to a pure innocent girl. I let my mind go numb, and I slowly let my fingers touch her arms. "--!" Hisui reacts with a jerk. But she tries not to react too much and endures it. "―― Hisui. I'm going to do it now―― are you absolutely sure that you're okay with this?" "―― Yes. Please― do as you wish. Please, love me." "-" As soon as I hear that, something flies away. My worries over Hisui completely vanish. "―――!" I grab her arms. "Aah――!" Her delicate body quivers nervously. I ignore it all and caress her neck with my tongue. "Ha--a, n--!" Hisui rolls her head back. Her body tenses up. "―― Just relax. I won't go that fast, so don't worry." I move my face from her neck down to her collarbone. My tongue makes a sticky path as it travels. "Ah―― Ye―― yes, relaxed――" Hisui stands still, as if she is some sort of a doll. I bet she won't move from that position unless I force her onto the bed. But for now, this is better. "―― Mm―― Hisui, your skin tastes good." "Ah―――!" Her body trembles. My words seem to affect her even more than my tongue going down to her breasts. But that's over. Holding her gently by the arms, I take my tongue onto her breasts. "―― Aah―― nn―― ah." I move my wet tongue. I lick her perfectly shaped breast from the crevice outward. "Mmm―― Hisui, you don't seem to be feeling good here." Saying so, I lick her nipple. "――!" Her body jerks. But I already have her by her arms. If there's anything she can do, it's― "Ah―― ah, n, no――" Kill her voice and look away. I roll around her nipples with the tip of my tongue. "N--ah, naah――!" I lick around. Her pink nipples start to harden. "What's this already? You look so calm, but you're pretty erotic, Hisui." "―― Ah―― n, no, I'm, not, ――!" ---Before she even has a chance to finish, I suck her breasts along with her nipples. "Haahah, mm" Maybe she is really embarrassed by being called erotic, she desperately tries to hold her voice in. ―― But, it's not that she is sensitive. The nipples harden after only light stimulation. The sensitive part that hardens when felt by someone, no matter how much the woman does not want it. That's the nipple, so actually, Hisui herself has nothing to do with this. "Mmm―― Already this hard. In that case―― maybe it'll be okay if I use my teeth." I bite down. "Aah--!" Her jaw rises. "Shi, Shiki-sama, th, thatah--!" I caress her with my tongue after biting down. "Haa--ah, mm―― nnna―" She feels some pain, then some pleasure, and her body goes powerless. "How cute. Your body reacts honestly, Hisui." "Eh――" It feels like she got warmer. Maybe it's not my imagination, but it really did get warmer. Her white skin has turned a shade of light pink. "―― Alright, now let's――" Releasing her arms, I hug her closer to me. "Ah――" Hisui falls onto the bed. I lie down too, on top of her. "Shiki-sama―― Um." "Hold on. I still haven't, gotten a good look at your most important part." "Eh--! Shi, Shiki-sama, that is not necessary, so――!" Hisui backs away bit by bit. But the more she does so, the more she gets in a position where I can take a good look at her. "―― Nn,――" I bury my face in her soft looking stomach. Since Hisui runs away, I am unable to lick her below her bellybutton, but I don't care. "Ah, ooh――!" Her body arches upwards. With both hands, I grab her breasts from below. "Aha, ah, n--!" Her voice jumps up to meet my rhythm. "Nn, n, n――!" Her sweet, moaning voice. The breasts I grabbed from below feel small indeed. I could cover them with my hand if I opened them up. They don't even bulge out past my fingers. "Ah―― mm―― n― ah, n―― n." Pinching her nipples with my fingers, I continue massaging her breasts softly. While Hisui immerses herself in that light pleasure, I arrive between her legs. ―― Her thin pubic hair. Her red flower bud. Below her swelling lips, her pink, throbbing entrance. ―― And her dripping, clear honey. I didn't think she was, since she stifled her voice so much, but it looks like she is pretty turned on already. "―― Mmn." As if I'm tasting her, I lightly glide my tongue around her entrance. "Nn, ahh―――!" Hisui arches her back in pleasure. "Ah―― Shiki-sama―― please. Don't―― look there." Hisui blushes furiously. "But if I can't see, I won't know. Here, I can't do it like this so you move too." "Eh―― move? What should I move――?" She has such a serious expression on her face, I'm the one who gets embarrassed. "Your legs. If you don't open them, I can't go in between them. Here, open them like this." Grabbing her thighs, I pry them open. "Ahno――! No, stop, Shiki-sama――!" Hisui desperately pulls back again. But I'm not about to stop here. With her legs spread far apart, I can see everything clearly. It really does look a little grotesque, but at the same time, unbelievably cute. "Mn――" I use the tip of my tongue to separate her folds. "N, ah--!" Hisui reacts strongly to my slight touch. It is wet with her love juice. ―― I'm worried how much longer my body will actually last, so even though her responses are so cute, I can't take up too much time. "---Hisui. I'm going to go, so relax. If it hurts, just tell me and I'll stop." "Y―― yes―― please, Shiki-sama――" Nodding at Hisui's wavering voice, I unzip my pants. My manhood urgently sticks out of my pants. "Ah――" Hisui sounds like she's seeing some kind of ghost. ---Just like that. I hold my hardened self and place my tip by her entrance. "N" She doesn't even resist. Hisui is so wet, there's no problem putting it in her. But that's just only the tip. "Ah――――, n--" Her eyes wide in surprise, Hisui stares at where the two of us are joined. The ripping of flesh. As soon as my tip enters, her body jerks back. "Haa―― ah―― aa――" Holding back her tears, she just stares at me. --She can't be feeling any pleasure right now. Hisui is just gaping at where our flesh meets, trying to bear the pain. "―― Ah―― ha, Ah――!" Her breathing is wild. Hisui is enduring her pain. But, she does not admit her pain. "Nn―― n, nnN, Ah!" Hisui takes in everything I do. And I---entranced by her warmness, I'm about to melt. *pant*--*pant**pant* Hisui isn't the only one breathing hard. She's so tight. Her insides are like a wall of flesh. It's probably because she has never experienced it, but it is really hard to push in, and her walls just wrap around me. "Nn--ah, ha, ah" But what is this feeling? As I enter her, my whole body comes alive. My breathing gets wild. My heart starts pumping harder. I burn with passion. "H--ah." My breath is hot. I feel as if I'm breathing fire. "--Hisu--i--" Now I--I can't breathe. "Ah―― Are you, alright, Shiki, sama?" Pain wreathes her voice. But still, she's worrying about me. -Thump. So cute. I push in harder, not caring if either one of us breaks. "Ah--ha, ah!" She tightens around all around me. My tip is completely inserted. My penis rips through her insides uncaringly. They grip me tightly. Her hips try to run away from the pain while still holding on to me. "Hisui―― does it hurt――?" "Ha―― ah―― N, No" Hisui weakly shakes her head. All she does is earnestly try to catch her breath. Looking down, I can already see blood pouring from her. Her virginity is already taken. Even still, she didn't even say one word---she never said it hurt. "―― I'm sorry, I should have been―― more gentle." I push in my hips. As if to betray my words, I push even more forcefully. The sound of our breathing fills the room. My hips pound back and forth. I take my inserted shaft, pull out a bit, and insert it once more. "Mm―――!" Not being able to resist the force, Hisui tightens even harder. ―― Pull. "Ah―― ha, ah." ―― Thrust. "Hwaa--! Ah, oh,n--ah." Pull, "Ha--ah, ah―――" Thrust. "N, ah―― ! Ha, ooh, ha, n――!" Pull, "Ah--Shi, Shiki, sa--" Thrust――! "Haah, Shiki― sama--!" ―― Her voice echoes in the air. But, I won't stop. Sliding, sliding, sliding. As I continue the cycle, it gets better inside of Hisui. Her tenseness eases, and she starts to accept me in her as her walls tighten around me and contract. "Ha―― ah, aha―― nn!" But she still sounds like she is in pain. Her breathing is wilder than mine and her body is shaking. "Hisui--this―" If it hurts, I should make her feel better quickly. "Ahaah, aah, aah, aah――!" But I can't stop. Exchanging body fluids had already been done once I was inside her. But I want to continue. "N--ah, ha, ha, n!" Her voice rises and falls in harmony with my thrusts. "Ha, ah, ah, Shiki, sama" It's gotta hurt, but she endures it quietly. ---Her figure. She looks so lovely, my body does not stop. Back and forth. With erotic sounds, I bury myself in a body that knows no pleasure. But---It'll all be over soon. "Hisui--here I come." I take a big breath. Even now, I still haven't brought myself fully inside of her. Just bringing half of myself in her brought tears to her eyes. If I put it all in, she might just pass out. Up until now, I haven't done that. "Hisui, with this" "Ah--ha, nn--!" But that was until now. My heart feels like it's exploding. So before that happens, I wanted to bury myself completely in her. "Hisui--!" I push harder. Hisui doesn't realize what I'm going to do. Without any further warning, I thrust my entire self into her. "Nn--!" Her back arches. Her perfect breasts shake and sweat peals down her body. "Ah--it, it hurts, Shiki-sama――!" For the first time, those words leave her mouth. "Nn--ha, ah!" But I can't stop. Pulling out, I thrust once more. "! Ah, aa, ha, oh―――!" Her trembling body. She desperately tries to hold back the pain. But this time, she feels pleasure. So---I keep going. "Ah, ha--Shiki, sama! Pl, please, stop, it――!" Raising her hips from the bed, she tries to escape from as much pain as she can. ---But that makes her tighten up even more. "S--Hisu, i--!" Everything overflows. The sensation starts to well within me. "Ha--ah, ah, ah―――!" Hisui's hips rock back and forth. That movement finishes me off. "Ah, k--!" I push in hard. "Ah--hwa-ah-AaAaa!" "Tss!" The feeling of explosive release. "Hisu― i!" That instant, I hold back and manage to pull out. I release. My hot, white fluid sprays over her belly. "Ah―― Shiki, sama――" Hisui just stares at it. Drip, drip. It looks like keloid on her otherwise perfect skin. But in contrast, she looks more appealing and at that second, I feel dizzy. "Haah." Taking a deep breath, I collapse on the bed. Hisui is laid out nearby in the same state. *pant* *pant* *pant* *pant* Hisui's pained gasps echo through the room. Hisui seems to have reached her limit with one time. "―― This will not do, Shiki-sama――" But Hisui lifts her body up. Her shoulders heave as she breathes hard, staring blankly at me. "Eh--what's wrong?" "―― You did it outside of me. You have to, um―― do it inside, or I― cannot accept you." "Inside? ―― That means―" I thought there'd be a lot of problems if I released inside of her, so I just--- "――――" Hisui looks at me apologetically. ―― Seeing that kind of face makes me feel sorry. After making her go through all that pain only to make it useless, it's completely my fault. "―― But, What should we do? Um―― do we have to give it one more try?" "――― Yes. If it is, what you wish." Hisui's voice almost disappears. ---If I wish so? Of course I wish so. Even though I just came, my penis is still fully erect. In all honesty, that was not enough. "I'm okay with it. But are you? If it still hurts, we can wait a little bit---" "―― No, I am fine. But please, before your body reaches its limit, please pour yourself into me." ―― Hisui― Even though she seems to be so tired she can't even talk steadily, she still insists on doing this. Hisui is really pushing herself. She is probably still hurting, and she must be tired. ―― I can't forcefully make love to her like that. "―― I understand. Then, come a little closer." "Eh---ah―――" Holding her arms, I sweep her on top of me. "Ah―― Shiki―― sama." She must be incredibly tired, because she just rests herself completely on me. "Yes―― please, do as you wish, Shiki-sama." Taking a deep breath, she puts her body right on mine. "―― Hisui. This is fine, please raise your hips a bit. You don't even have to move. I'll go slow." Hisui wordlessly agrees. Her hips inch upwards. Still wet from last time, I place my erect manhood against her. ―― A sliding touch. I don't enter, but just rub her gently. "Nnn―――" Hisui breathes sweetly. Her body is tense. She readies herself for it to enter her again. Sliding, sliding. Slowly, I rub against her teasingly. "A―― n, ―― Na―――― Ah." She moans. Her breathing swirls down my chest. ―― Slide, ―― Slide, ―― Slide. "Ha―――― Nnngu―― n, Ha" As I rub her with my shaft, her breathing heightens. Calmly, our bodies meet like puppies licking and greeting each other. The sound of our wet flesh meeting becomes louder and more frequent. "A―― Ha―― Ahh, a――― nn." I feel like I'm rubbing against the sweetest jam in existence. "N―― Shiki―― sama, I, I――" Her voice sounds even more passionate than before. Back and forth, up and down. Her love juices flow between us, coating us with sticky passion. "―― Nnnn――― ha--ah――――― Ha." When I notice, I realize my hips aren't the only ones moving. It really is a small movement. As if trying to relieve an itch, Hisui rubs herself against me. "NnnHisu, Hisui--" The rubbing causes a thrill of pleasure to shoot through me. "Hisui, m―― more." I can't resist, and I grab her hips. "N--" Hisui stops suddenly. I revel in the feeling. I grip just a little stronger and feel her firmness. "Ah--Shiki-sama, right---there---" "―― I see. That was just a little break." I let my power out. Her hips start to move again and she breathes out in short, sweet sighs again. The sweet sliding friction. I continue sliding in between her cheeks. "―― Hisui. Could you use more of your body――?" "Eh―― yes. Like, this――?" Slide, slide-slide. She slides all the way down, meeting my hips. "Mmm--yeah, that feels--great." Hisui slowly and sensuously raises her hips. "Ah―― stuck, feels――" Did I catch on something? The movement stops for an instant. But, no big deal. Hisui smoothly moves up again. "Haa―― This, is great." This really gets me excited. It isn't even doing much, so why---why does it feel so good, and why does it make Hisui look so adorable? "N―― ha, AhAh." Hisui can't stop herself from voicing her passion. Moving her hips up and down, she leans the rest of her body on mine. "―― Hisui―― does it feel good――?" "Y―― s. Yes―― Shiki-sama, your chest―― is broad, I feel―― so relaxed---" Exhaling, she presses herself even more against me. I continue to revel in the rubbing her sliding cheeks give me. "Tss." My heart rate increases even more. ―― This gentle foreplay starts to overwhelm me. Hisui isn't the only one feeling the pleasure. "Ha" I tense the muscles below my groin. It's to stop the urge rising from my very core. Even though I'm just rubbing against her, it's as close to the real thing as it'll be. No, knowing that I'm rubbing her outside numbs my mind and brings me more pleasure than the real thing. Our bodies are clenched together. The sensation of her breasts pushing up against my chest is so wonderfully soft. No, the feeling of her small, delicate body just resting on mine is even better. Our voices rise in harmony with the pistoning of our bodies. Hisui relaxes completely, moving only her hips. Her beautiful back, the sensuous curves of her bottom, all of it---I love all of it. "Hisui---can I?" "Eh―― are you, stopping already――?" Hisui must've really enjoyed it because she regretfully plays her fingers on my chest. "We don't have a choice. I have to do it inside of you, so we have to do it right." "Ah―― yes, that is right―" Hisui slowly moves her body. As she moves to pull back, she gets down on all fours, like a cat. "" Her posture jumps out at me. "Hisui, don't move." "Eh――? But Shiki-sama, we cannot―― do it, like this, right?" "It's okay, just lift your hips a little. No, not with your hands---get on your knees and elbows." "――?" Confused, Hisui tilts her head to the side, but complies. All set. Since Hisui's well rested, I won't hold back. To let out all that's been welled up inside me, I get behind her and--- ---I enter her from behind. "Nku!?" The bed rocks. "Ah---n, nku" Hisui drops her back. Her toes curl up as if resisting the shock. Seeing her completely from this angle, her body seems entirely different. Her long, white, graceful legs. The single curve of her unblemished back is like a field of virgin snow. It's so white and pure, I get the urge to bury my face in it. "―― Wow. I can even see your asshole and― right here― completely." "Shi, Shiki-sama--please, don't say things like that――!" Hisui blushes and shakes her head. But Hisui can't turn her body because I am in her now. "If I do exactly the same old thing, it'll be boring. I think you're already used to it too, so we'll do it this way this time." "Ha―― Shiki-sama, why is it that you are only mean, now――!?" "―――― Tch." I punish her by entering a little deeply. "A--n, ku――!" I slide inside her, making churning noises. Looks like my foreplay really helped. Her smoothness now feels completely different from earlier. "N--this, --" N, Ah――! Ha―― Ah--" "It doesn't hurt as much, does it, Hisui--!" "Nn!" I thrust my hips into her. Her white hips shake as I thrust. With every thrust, her love juices flow out and trickle down her legs. "Ah--ha, ah, Shiki, sama―――――!" Her arms dig desperately into the bed. "Ha, oh, oh, n―― Ah, n---!" Her body shakes every time I thrust into her. "―― Nn, nah, ha--Ah!" She squeezes all around me. Her insides are more intense, more sensational than before. Her contractions pull me in deeper towards her center. "Ah--, n--!" Slide. "Ha--ah― Shiki-sa--ma, n, oh--!" Slide, slide. "―― Ah, haa, haa, haan――" Slide, slide, slide, slide. "---Hwaa, ah, ah, ah--!" Slide, Slide, Slide, Slide――! "N--oh, Shiki-sama--please, not so--wild――!" "Haa--ah, Haa, ahh, ah――!" I can't hear her well. All I can hear is my own heartbeat. Even that---starts to disappear. "Ah--ah, please, stop, I, I am going--!" Her voice reaches a scream. Squeeze. She grips me way harder than before. "Aah--Hi― sui――!" "Shiki, sa, ma--!" I come. Our sensations climax together at the same time at an ever-rising crescendo, and then stop. "Ha--ah." I explode inside of her. I continue to release in her in desperate spurts. The lingering sensation. I quiver inside of her as Hisui's hips jerk. "Nn―― It's--finished." I pull myself out of her. "Ha―― ah." ―― I'm spent. I'm so tired I feel like sleeping right now. "Hisui―― did it hurt――?" "―― Ah―― no, it hurt less than the first time." In other words, it still hurt. ―― I regret it again. Why is that during all of this, all I end up doing is being mean to her like this――? "Then, it's over, right――? I'm sorry, hurting you twice like this." "―― Not at all. If I could help you, then I am satisfied." Hisui says this as she lies there, staring blankly. Her eyes aren't even focusing on anything. ―― Is that what they call absence of mind? It seems Hisui simply lies there without any rational thought. But her eyes still holds tears, and I feel a stabbing pain in my heart. "―― I'm sorry, Hisui. I've made you cry so much." I brush off her tears with my finger. ---And then. All of a sudden, Hisui grabs my palm. "―― Hisui?" "Shiki―――― sama." She takes my finger and sticks it in her mouth. "Um――" I don't even know what to say. Hisui just lies there, as if all she wanted to feel was the pressure of my finger. "―――――" Hisui looks like she isn't even thinking about anything. I think I was just a little too rough earlier and she's doing this since her head is still blanked out. "―――― N―――― a――――" Hisui distantly sucks on my finger. ―― For some reason, I'm really enjoying this. I don't pull away, but rather go with her movement. Squish, squish. I start to feel her tongue with my finger. "―――― Mmm―" Hisui just continues. ―― Those eyes, still flowing with tears, seem to be in a trance. She isn't even licking me, she's just holding it in her mouth. "N―――― nn―" As if it was something precious to her, she just holds it. Hisui just unconsciously caresses me. She grips my hand as if it were a treasure. "N―― Shiki, sama――" A slight squeeze. Hisui bites down gently on my finger. "Hisui." I feel the blood start to circulate within me once more. No, this isn't right. What am I thinking---about Hisui who's already this tired? "Hisui--" "―― Yes. What is it, Shiki-sama?" "Hisui, I want to make love to you, one more time." I just blurt out my selfish thoughts to her. Hisui---she just stares at me. "―― How, come? There is no longer any need for you to do so." "―― No, that's not it. I haven't really made love to you yet." ―― That's right. Before, it was just to help me recover--that's all it was from the beginning. But I don't want it to be like that. I really love her, and---for no other reason, I want to make love to her. "It isn't enough, Hisui. I don't want to do it for healing. I like you, Hisui---I love you. That's why I want you now, Hisui." "―――――" "So for that reason, I ask you for one more time. Not for anything like just exchanging fluids. I just---really want to make love to you." "―――― Shiki, sama." Consciousness returns to her eyes. Still biting down on my finger, she looks at me. "―― Is it okay, Shiki-sama. I, I am―" "Don't be stupid. I only want you, Hisui." "---" The sound of a sigh. But right after that, she gives me her tender smile. "―― Yes. I want to be loved by you too, Shiki-sama." That is her answer. "Well then. This time, you ride on top of me, Hisui." "Eh―― on― top――?" She doesn't understand what I mean and looks at me, confused and a little embarrassed. "What's this? You still can't be embarrassed. There isn't a part of you I haven't seen." "Ah――――" As soon as I say that, her face blushes a bright red. ―― Even though we've done it so roughly, Hisui still hesitates like it's her first time. "It's okay, so just get on top!" Grabbing her arms, I raise her on top of me. "Kyaa--ah, eh――?" I feel her butt on my stomach. With her back to me, she lowers her hips. "Ah――" I hear her sudden intake of breath. I bet she's looking at my erect manhood in front of her. "Shi, Shiki-sama, um――" Not knowing what to do and unable to escape, she blushes furiously and asks me for help. ――― This is bad. She is so cute I just might die. "What should I do now--hyaa!?" She looks up quickly. Her body reacts as I lick her defenseless back. "Ha---Shi, Shiki, sama---" "Mmm---your ass, it's so tiny, so cute." Licking the center of her back, I use a hand to hold onto her cheeks. "N――――!" Her back arches in response. "Ha―― n, nnn――" Hisui tries to resist the sensation of my tongue playing along her back. "Ah―― Shiki-sama, that―― tickles." She twists around while increasing her body heat. Sweat glistens in rivulets down her body. "―― Um―― Shiki-sama. What---should―― I--do now?" Her last words are barely even said. I get this feeling that she will always act like this, no matter how many times we do this. "Simple. You don't have to move." "Eh---ah―――!" I wrap both my hands around her stomach. Gathering up my strength, I pick her up. "Ah--! U, um, Shiki-sama, are you going to――" "--" Not answering her question, I set about to do what she is thinking. "Hwa―――――――!!!" Thrust. I penetrate her from underneath. "Ah--ah, Hwa!" Her body jumps up. Trying to get away from what is coming at her from below, she tries to prevent her body weight from finishing it. Between these two forces, her nerves don't stand a chance. "―― I'm moving, Hisui――!" "Ah―― N, no, please stop――!" Ignoring her, I lift her up and bring her down. "N, ha――! Ah, Aah, HaAaAAA――!" Her fingers clench as her senses are overwhelmed. I guess I'm hitting her in a different spot as she is reacting more now. "Ah, Shi---Shiki-sama, inside of, me---!" Her voice is almost a scream. I keep lifting her, and lowering her. "Ha--ah, ,nwa!" I can feel her tightening her butt. And at the same time, her insides tighten up. "N---Hisui, not so---relax a bit---" "Ah---ha, ah" My voice doesn't seem to reach her. As if in a dream, she continues to contract and wrap her walls around my manhood. "Haaku――――!" Trying to fight back, I lift her up again. The sound of our flesh sliding past. "HA―― ah, ha―――" The crushing feeling subsides and Hisui tries to catch her breath. At that same time, I lower her once more. "Nwaa!" The pressure tightens around me again. Her heat transmits itself all the way through me. Her warmth causes my mind to blank out completely. "―― Yo―― u――" I don't know what got me mad. But I just slide Hisui's body with all my might. "! Ah, ha--naa--!" The sticky sound of juices and flesh meeting and parting. "N--ah, Shiki-sama!" My shaft gets drenched. Her love juices mix with mine and soak me. "Nthis, this is--" And suddenly, I'm not only moving Hisui's body, but I am also moving my hips up into her. ---*pant* *pant* *pant* Holding Hisui's body and moving my hips is a big load. Naturally, my breathing starts to become rapid. But--- "Ah―― it―― h, hurts, Shiki-sama――!" ---*pant* *pant* *pant* I don't care. Hisui. If I could make Hisui mine, then such a thing---! "Nhaa--! Ah, hwa, Shiki--saplease, moreslower――!" ---*pant* *pant* *pant* I thrust up. I thrust up to fill her insides. "―― Ah! ―― No, if this continues---I, I will――!" ---*pant* *pant* *pant* Her convulsing body. Her arching back. Her fluttering hair. Is it pain, or is it pleasure? The drool leaking from her mouth tells me that she's lost all her reason. "Ha, n, nn, ah---! Haa, it, hwa, it hurts---Shiki-sama, please――――!!!!" Her body is on fire. It feels like I am inside an oven. Or, is it. Is it my own column of flesh, swollen with blood that is on fire? ---*pant* *pant* *pant* *pant* "Ah, ha--Shiki-sama, I--!" Even though her eyes are flooding with tears, she still brings down her body onto me once more. Her feeling. Her warmth. Her voice. Tears. All of it. All of it is precious. "Hisui---my, Hisui--!" I penetrate again with all my strength. My heart pounds wildly. "I love you---more than anyone, more than anything, I love only you, Hisui――!" Not thinking, I let loose these words. Baring all of my feelings, I thrust into her passionately. "Ha--ah, ah!" Her spasming body. I feel the climax of all these emotions, all these sensations coming. "Me, me too――!" *pant* *pant* *pant* *pant* "Ah---Shiki-sama, I love you too---Shiki-sama, always――!" Her body tenses. All the love within me gathers up. *pant* *pant* *pant* *pant*――! "Hisui!" "Ah---yes, Shiki, sama―――!" Our emotions fuse together. We climax together. "---Hisu, i!" I release inside of her. "Ah―― ha, n!" I embrace her shaking body close to mine. "Ah--ah." Hisui endures the heat flowing into her. "Nnah." Her voice lowers. Probably because my finger is in her mouth. Our heartbeats harmonize and pulse together. She still shakes from the lingering sensations inside of her. I want to ease that, and hold on to her. "―― Shiki, sama――" Why is she crying? From her eyes the tears keep falling. "I―― this―" It seems her wavering voice contains some regret. "―― What, Hisui? ―― Did it hurt――?" "―― No―― I am scared, of this happiness." Taking a deep breath, her shaking stops. "Ah――" The strength drains from her body. Exhausted, she leans her whole onto me. "―― I'm so sorry―― Nee-san." With that last remark, she collapses and closes her eyes. The sound of gentle breathing reaches my ears. "―― Are you sleeping, Hisui?" Placing her on the bed, I pull the sheets over her. Unlike Hisui, who's exhausted, I still have a lot of energy. ―― No, even though I am tired, the condition I had before is totally gone. So, it seems for tonight, I can move like a normal person once again. ―― Hisui sleeps in my bed. It might be because she helped me regain my strength, but Hisui is absolutely exhausted. "―― Or maybe, I pushed her too hard." I feel a tinge of regret. ―― All of this was her first time, so that was really too much for her. "―― But she is just so cute, I couldn't help it." I make up an excuse, but it can't be helped. Hisui sleeps, taking relaxed breaths. ―― If I'm going to take action, it has to be now. "―― Sorry. Sleep just a little longer, Hisui." After running my hand through her hair one last time, I change my clothes and leave the room. ---That's right. Akiha and Kohaku-san aren't here. This is a good opportunity. I can do some investigating into what happened eight years ago. I enter the old man's room. ―― This place should definitely have something to answer my questions. "―― The desk drawer―― it's empty now." There might be something that belongs to the old man in one of the locked drawers. But I don't think he'll keep something that important there. "―― It'd be great if he had a safe or something." I search the room. "―――― Here it is." I find something like a safe pretty easily. There's no external lock and I don't know the dial combination. So I take off my glasses, and I cut its "line". "―― Hmm――" There seems to be an old diary and some envelope. The diary looks like that of a child's and the other looks like some old letters. "―― Old letters? Why?" The handwriting is definitely my old man's. It's fragmented and I can't understand it at first glance. ---The date starts in the summer of eight years ago and seems to continue on a past that. "――――" I don't understand it yet, but I continue leafing through it. ~ Month ~ Day My son SHIKI succumbed to his Tohno blood. SHIKI, he killed my adopted son who happened to be there. (The adopted son is the heir of the house Nanaya. I guess it is a blessing in all the unfortunate events that he isn't in the same family as the Synchronizers, like Kohaku and Hisui.) SHIKI's inversion impulse is terrible. So it was determined that he must be eliminated. I have my duty as the head of the Tohno household, but killing my own son is so difficult. The Tohno blood, more in SHIKI than in AKIHA. Talking about potential, I feel an older origin in Akiha's blood, but SHIKI's Tohno blood runs much stronger. I assume that is why SHIKI inverted before he became an adult. SHIKI's powers are "immortality" and "fusion". SHIKI could not manage the awakened powers and as a result, killed the adopted Nanaya child, taking his life. I have to say it was a superb job for using his powers for the first time. ~ Month x Day Both SHIKI and the adopted son managed to escape death. Before I killed SHIKI, he killed the adopted son and stole his "life", regenerating himself with it. I don't know if it is because he was so close to death, but SHIKI has regained some of his sanity. Even though it is dangerous, I will not kill him but simply separate him from the mansion for a while. On the other hand, the adopted child of Nanaya will not live long even if he does survive. Even if he does heal, his life has been taken by SHIKI. His body can die any day. As long as the adopted child lives, there is a possibility that his mind will be attuned with SHIKI's. It seems it is a side effect of their two lives being linked. But if that happens, the adopted son will die eventually, so there is no problem there. ~ Month ~ Day The problem of maintaining appearances to normal society still remains. SHIKI has killed the adopted Nanaya child. I have covered up the incident, but SHIKI cannot be shown to the public. The wound I gave him hasn't healed and his figure has transformed. He is not in a condition to be brought in front of others as Tohno SHIKI―― he cannot be called a human either. The Nanaya child still lives. As long as he lives, I've decided to use him. If there are any disagreements, I would like to hear them. Complementarity. The Nanayas are a family that produces killers. If that adopted son happens to stay alive, the link between him and SHIKI may corrupt SHIKI's mind. Even if SHIKI regains his sanity, I cannot deny the possibility of the Nanaya child's influence turning him into a killer. To not let this happen, we must have him somewhere where we can keep an eye on him. But we cannot allow him near the Tohno mansion either. I should have him raised by an appropriate branch of the family. ~ Month x Day ―― The Tohno blood that has awakened within SHIKI. Maybe it is because he was so close to death, but he has regained his sanity like before. But I don't know if something will cause him to invert again. Even though it tears me apart, I cannot allow SHIKI near the Tohno mansion either. I place him in the care of a trusted servant. ~ Month x Day I still haven't received word that his sanity has completely been restored. ―― A year has passed with him under the care of another house. My heart is in anguish. It is so hard for me when I think of the way my own son has to live. As soon as SHIKI heals, I will be able to bring him back to the mansion. "--What is― this?" Adopted son. I knew about the adoption ten years ago. Even though I don't exactly remember the details, I know about it. ―― He killed me? Eight years ago, in that courtyard? "―― Our minds are linked――" The words say that my mind and his are possibly linked. Normally, this story would just be something to laugh off. But, right now, it explains too much. "No." No, that's not it. This isn't anything like that. "--Kk." ―― I know. Even though I already know about it, I try not to notice. ---I want to deny it again. The adopted child was― The one who was killed was― I know which is which, but I don't want to admit it. "Tch--this is useless." Cursing myself, I toss the letters to the side. "―― All that's left is this." I pick up the diary in the safe. It looks like a child's diary; certainly nothing Tohno Makihisa would have had. I flip the pages. There are only two words. HELP ME Like that. On a white page, it is written really small. "―――― Huh?" I flip through the pages. HELP ME. I turn the page. HELP ME. I turn the page. HELP ME. I turn the page. "Wha" It's like a curse that brings the reader to the depths of darkness. HELP ME HELP ME HELP ME HELP ME HELP ME HELP ME HELP ME  HELP ME   HELP ME   HELP ME  HELP ME  HELP ME  HELP ME  HELP ME  HELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPMEHELPME "" ―― I feel sick. I've seen many nightmares up until now, but this is far worse. Those words, "HELP ME". It isn't that whoever wrote this diary knew only those words. Only these words. That is all this person could feel. None of the dark litany was scribbled out. One letter after another, like the spewed feelings of this person. This is the only way the author could escape. This person knew no other way to let out this curse. "―― Ah." There is still more than half the diary to look at. I, I can't bring myself to read the rest of it. "" I flip through the pages trying not to look at its contents. As I flip through the pages, my hand stops on the very last page. "―― Regular sentences――?" On the last page, there is a short paragraph. Silver lettering adorns the otherwise perfectly white sheet. So it's better to just become a doll Gradually, my body stopped generating a pulse Blood vessels turned into tubes one by one Blood vanished like vapor My heart, everything, just crafted parts See, that's why   there will be no more pain "--" ―― Closing the diary, I put it back in the safe. I don't know why Tohno Makihisa kept such a thing. But I do know one thing. Fearing the child's malice, it was something meant to be sealed away in the safe. ―― The day draws to a close. The dark garden. The dark trees spread out before me like a black vale. I remember the dream I saw before coming to this mansion. "―――― Alright." It isn't that there is something there. I just need to confirm something in my heart, so I enter the black vale. There isn't anything here. It's not like the body of the one killed eight years ago is here. It's not like the blood of the one killed eight years ago is here. "――――" For an instant, the scene flashes in my mind. That hot summer day. I was looking down at my blood-stained self as if I was another person. "―― So. Someone must have been killed here." Whether it was me or him, I don't know. Which one was adopted? Which one is the monster SHIKI? "―― If I think about it logically, I had to have been the one to kill him here." "That is incorrect. The one who was killed, was you, Shiki-sama." "!?" I turn around. I don't know when she arrived, but Hisui is there. "Hisui. You woke up already? ―― Don't push yourself. Aren't you still tired――?" "Shiki-sama, you are the one who should not push yourself. You are still losing energy at a great pace, much more than you have gained." Hisui stands before me. "Ah――" ―― My pulse picks up. Hisui standing so close to me really does make me feel more alive. "Wow, my body really is warm. ―― I think it is your warmth coming into me." "But Hisui, what are you saying? You say that I was killed here---do you know what happened here?" "---Yes. I saw you die here. You were killed, by SHIKI―― not just your body and soul, but everything was killed." Her voice is shaking. It isn't that she is scared. Instead, she sounds incredibly angry at that person who killed me. "―― Wait a sec, Hisui. The one who was killed was the adopted Nanaya kid. So wasn't he the one who died?" "No, you are the one that died, Shiki-sama." Hisui answers directly. Oh, I see. Then that means--. "---I see. So, I'm the adopted child?" "―― Yes, you are a descendant of the Nanaya family. Makihisa-sama adopted you, the only surviving member. ―― Your name is Shiki---and because Makihisa-sama found it amusing that his son was also named SHIKI by a strange coincidence, he adopted you." "Our namesare the same?" "Yes. It is natural for you to be confused. And you are different from us; you were really adopted into the Tohno family." "---" I can't speak. ―― Such a thing, isn't a shock or anything. I remember not getting along with my old man from the beginning, and I never felt quite right in the mansion― So such a thing--- Such a--- Such a thing Even if it were all lies, I--- "―― I am very sorry. Saying things that cause you sadness." "No, I'm fine. I'm not sad." I say that, but I know it's a lie. I don't know what kind of feeling it is. But it is true that I feel an emptiness in my heart. "---But, that's weird. People of the Tohno bloodline have powers don't they? He―― if SHIKI is a vampire, then what am I? I'm not the same as him, but I have these strange eyes." "―― I do not know in detail. But Akiha-sama said that you are the same as Nee-san and I, whose families are enemies to those of 'mixed blood'. ―― We have the power to synchronize with those we exchange fluids with, and the Nanaya family had the power to fight demons." ―― I see. Certainly my eyes are not a power to help people like Hisui's. Rather, it is a power to kill. "―― I see. But then, why was I adopted by the old man? It doesn't make any sense why he would adopt an enemy." "―― Shiki-sama, you are the inheritor of a very special bloodline of demon hunters. Asagami, Fujyou, Ryougi and Nanaya. These four families are the enemies of 'mixed blood'. I think Makihisa-sama brought you here to help fend off something." "―― I mean, how did he even get a chance to adopt me in the first place?" "I―― I heard that you were the only member of the Nanaya family to survive―" "――― Ah, I see." Ten years ago. The Japanese style house nestled deep within the mountains. Surrounded by a black forest, a rustic world isolated from the flow of history. ―― I can't, quite, remember it well. All I can remember is that pale, blue glass moon. And in the forest's clearing, a figure that looked like Tohno Makihisa was cutting up lots of people. --*sigh* But that was then, and this is now. Something done so long ago, it doesn't matter now. "―― Well, I understand that I was killed by SHIKI here. But how is it that I am living as Tohno Shiki right now?" "―― Yes. Without a doubt, you were stabbed by SHIKI in the chest and on the verge of death. But by some miracle, you were able to recover. You were saved and SHIKI also survived. Since no one died, everything should have ended right then. But SHIKI became something that could not be shown to other people." "I see, so a replacement was needed for Tohno SHIKI. The name of Tohno Makihisa is in the top of the business world; his son can't just suddenly die." "―― Yes. Makihisa-sama pretended that the Nanaya child died, and had you live as Tohno Shiki―― It was all to protect the family name." "―― I get it, it's something the old man would do." Yeah, everything fits in now. Even though I am Tohno Shiki, I'm not technically part of the Tohno family. Besides Akiha, no one else holds that blood. So my old man sent me to live with the Arimas, and contrived a situation where I couldn't be the successor since my health was bad even though I was supposedly the eldest son of the Tohno household. "Shiki-sama---I―" "―― It's fine. You don't have to apologize for keeping this a secret. Just telling me now is enough. Besides, aren't you like me?" "No, compared to you or Nee-san, I have not suffered at all――! Even after Makihisa-sama died, Akiha-sama took us under her care. So only I lived peacefully, not knowing anything――!" "Wait, Hisui. Akiha--she knows that I'm not her real brother――?" "―― Yes. She heard it from Makihisa-sama after you were adopted. But, Akiha-sama would always insist that you were her real brother. ―― Every day, Makihisa-sama would tell Akiha-sama to forget about you. But, Akiha-sama would never agree. Even though she would be scolded severely, she still waited for you in her heart. "―― If you knew the truth, you would leave. That is why Akiha-sama told us to never let you know the truth. Akiha-sama always helped Nee-san and myself. Nee-san was Makihisa-sama's servant and was not allowed out of his room. Akiha-sama hated that and freed Nee-san. So---for Akiha-sama's sake, we continued the lie. Akiha-sama, all of us― we wanted you to come back." "―――― Hisui." "So please, do not hate Akiha-sama. More than anyone else, she thinks importantly of you." "―― Yeah, I know. There's no way I would hate her. It's more appropriate for me to be hated. I was the one living peacefully while you were all suffering." "―――" So. I am thankful to Akiha. She welcomed me, nothing more than an outsider, back into the mansion. She even calls me brother. ―― So, I'll have to keep it up too. If she is willing to call me Tohno Shiki, as her brother, then I don't care about the name Nanaya Shiki. I have to continue being her brother, continue being Tohno Shiki "G!" "Shiki-sama!?" Hisui rushes to me. I separate myself from Hisui, who was staring with a worried face, and take a deep breath. "―― Geez. I just got helped by you, Hisui, but I'm still having these headaches." ;翡翠申し訳なさそう "---Shiki-sama. Your body's weakening is because of that incident eight years ago. At that time, SHIKI stole your life and is using it to prolong his own life. That---that is why you are weakening, and why you are linked with SHIKI." "―― I see. So, that's how it is. In other words, as long as I don't do something about that killer---SHIKI, I won't be able to return to normal." "―― Yes. I believe he despises you utterly. That is why he is stealing your life gradually, trying to dirty your heart; he is enjoying your pain." Her voice is shaded with anger again. "He hates me? ―― I don't get it. He's the one that killed me. I can understand me having a grudge against him, but why would he have a grudge against me?" "No, SHIKI sees you as someone who has killed him. Shiki-sama, you have caused the existence of Tohno SHIKI to disappear." "――? I caused him to disappear――?" "Yes. You were certainly killed by SHIKI. But once your life was saved, you took SHIKI's place as Tohno Shiki. ―― After that, the SHIKI who was confined somewhere must have viewed you as a threat. Tohno SHIKI is still alive, but there is now someone else existing as Tohno Shiki. SHIKI is still alive, but you have taken away everything as Tohno Shiki, and he became something that has no name, no existence." "―― I see. So he views himself as the rightful Tohno SHIKI, and sees me as an impostor. No wonder---" SHIKI wants to kill me and get everything back. "But, that is coming to an end. I will protect you, Shiki-sama. No matter what SHIKI does, I will not let him kill you once again. ―― Even if the killer SHIKI walks the streets, he will be disposed of. So please, until then, rest in your room." "――――――" Rest in my room――? No, that won't help me. She doesn't know it, but our fusion gets worse by day. That means, if he really does go crazy, I don't know if I can stay sane myself. "―― Ha. He's a guy who would hurt even himself to get his revenge." ―― Revenge? No, that's not it. ―― The SHIKI who says he was killed by me. ―― The SHIKI who sees me as an impostor. ―― The SHIKI who repeatedly says he will kill me. ―― The SHIKI who says any of this would not have happened if I was not here. ―― The SHIKI who has lost his sanity like Tohno Makihisa, killing people in the streets. And, yes. ---The one who died in the distant past,       the child called Nanaya Shiki. Unconsciously, I grit my teeth. "Don't be ridiculousI'm the one who has the right to be bitter, SHIKI." Suddenly, the old wound on my chest starts to hurt. There's only one way to stop this pain. "Shiki-sama, where are――?" "You know. He says he's going to come. But I'm not going to wait for him." I know where his hideout is. I will end this worthless connection of ours. "Please stop, Shiki-sama――! With your body like that, it will be too dangerous." "Hisui. Sorry, but there's a knife in my room. Would you go get it for me?" "---I refuse. I cannot let you go." "―― Oh well, I'll get it myself. Watch over things when I'm gone." "Shiki-sama――!" Turning my back to Hisui, I walk away. "Shiki-sama! If you do that, I will really get upset――!" Silently apologizing to Hisui, I head back inside. --I leave the gate. In my pocket is the knife engraved with "Nanaya". Thanks to Hisui, I have strength in my body now. If there is a problem, that is--- "―――――――" that Hisui remains by my side. "―― Hisui. Please, go back to the mansion." "―― I refuse. You did not listen to my words, so I will not listen to yours." Hisui peevishly tosses her head to the side. "Now look. I'm not saying you're going to get in the way. ―― Um, the place I'm going to is very dangerous, so I want you to stay in the mansion." "You say that, but should I leave, you will collapse. If you really do want to go, it will be a big problem for you unless I go along." "Eh---your power, is like that? But, we did that―― we joined our bodies together so much, shouldn't I be good for a while?" "―― No. That is just like a ritual to form intimate bonds between us. Even if someone has exchanged fluids with me or Nee-san, they cannot receive energy if we are not nearby." "That's―" That's a huge problem. If that is true, then I can't even get to the school by myself. "If you still order me to stay here, I will. Please, decide on what I should do." Hisui looks at me directly. "―― Uuu." ―― It seems my answer is already decided. If I can't get to school without her help, then I can only let her come with me. ―― For the first time in so many days, I arrive at school. The eerie silence sends a chill down my spine. A space where no living presence can be felt. Even though it holds hundreds of students during the daytime, it looks like an abandoned ruin under the moonlight. "Shiki-sama, is this really the right place――?" "--" I don't have the words to answer her. I've only seen him being in school in my dreams. "―― Let's go, Hisui." We walk through the front gate. "" "Shiki-sama, this is--" Hisui halts immediately like I did. Creak. Night hangs over the school building. As soon as I pass the gate, I feel something wrong in the air. Creak, creak. ―― The air as a whole is creaking. The tense atmosphere stings our lungs. Creak, creak, creak. "―― This feeling, it's--" I've felt this ill wind many times in my nightmares. The air is thick with a murderous intent. Hostility. Hatred. Inside the building, the darkness is filled with murderous intent as if a battle to the death is occurring like in my dreams. "SHIKI―― he's fighting someone?" ―― I don't get it. There couldn't be anyone that would be able to fight an inhuman monster like him. "Nee, san--?" A whisper. Hisui speaks this, as if resisting the urge to throw up. ---Nee-san---Kohaku-san. Akiha hasn't been in the mansion since morning. She left with Kohaku-san and didn't return all day. ―― Last night― When I was locked up in my room, Akiha told me to just wait a little longer. "Wha---? ―― Don't tell me---Akiha!?" My legs spring into action. Before I start to think, I dash towards the building. I run into the building. Inside, the air is even more tense. "Shiki-sama---" "―――――――" Not answering her, I search for any indication of presence. The hallway. Is horribly. Quiet. "―――!" Skreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! A high pitched sound assails my eardrums. It shakes the windows. ---The sound, it's coming from the floor above me. "Shiki-sama, that's--" "―― Just stay close. Let's go, Hisui." Grabbing Hisui's hand, I bolt to the stairs. ---Still holding her hand, I go up the stairs. "――――" I clench my teeth. That day. I remember about the time when I left the room and overheard Akiha and Kohaku-san talking. Akiha said she would kill SHIKI---her brother. I know now that she didn't mean me, but she meant SHIKI. Without a doubt, the ones fighting right now are Akiha and SHIKI. Skreeee! The ear-piercing noise screams once again. The sound comes from above--around the fourth floor. "That idiot――!" I fly through the third floor. Damn it---she's being unreasonable. Because of my nightmares, I understand SHIKI's body the best. His power isn't on the same level as a human's. I don't know how "nonhuman" the members of the Tohno family are, but she won't be able to win. It would be like going to get herself killed. "――――!" I run up the stairs as fast as I can. ---Akiha. I turned her away, not trusting her. I haven't done anything to act like her brother, but still she calls me her brother. And now, she is fighting the killer SHIKI by herself. "Damn---it!" ―― I just have this terrible, awful feeling. Akiha---Akiha can't possibly win. Will SHIKI kill her? ―― I don't know. I don't think he will kill Akiha since he persistently went after Akiha in the dreams. But, on the other hand― I don't think he has the same definition of being 'persistent' about someone. Our definition is obtaining the ones we are persistent about. He's crazy. I can't understand his broken conceptions since I'm not. No, even a lunatic couldn't understand another lunatic's thoughts. Since the lunatic himself can't understand it, no one understands it, and he has to be alone. "Aki― ha---" ---She is alive. Akiha― She has to be alive. There's no way she'll be killed by SHIKI. Because I should be the one SHIKI is going to kill. Akiha---I cannot let her die in my place. If such a thing happens, I--- Skreeeeeee! As I arrive on the fourth floor, that sound screeches once more. It's close. It feels like it is in the hallway past these stairs. "Akiha!!" The worst mental image still writhing in my brain, I dash into the hallway. Eh? For a moment, I stand, dumbstruck. "---" From behind me, I hear Hisui gasp. "AAki― ha." That's the only thing that pops into my head. The Moonlit hallway. In the freezing air that cuts into my lungs, Akiha is standing, a few yards down the hall. Like blood, a deep crimson. ---At first, it looks like Akiha's blood. But that's not right. What is red is just her long, long hair. "--" I'm still not able to grasp what is going on. Down the hallway, there is Akiha, with her red flowing hair and--- him, crouching with one hand on the floor, coughing up blood. The one kneeling before Akiha is him---SHIKI. Akiha is looking down at him. ―― Drawing close behind her is the figure of Kohaku-san. SHIKI is seemingly on the verge of death and gasping for air. Akiha is not even breathing wildly. ---The situation. Unbelievably, it would seem Akiha is the one overwhelming him. "Gu―――!" SHIKI leaps forward. In a flash of speed I can't even follow, a black blur shoots toward Akiha. Skreeeeeeeee! Akiha simply glances down at SHIKI. With that, his body slams down to the ground, and as if in response to the sound. His torso burns, giving out smoke. "Hya--aaAaaaaaAH!" SHIKI's screams echo through the hallway. His evaporating body is covered in smoke. His body under his kimono has mostly bones showing, like a mummy. But he still lives, his gruesome form still staring at Akiha. His eyes filled with fear. On the other hand, Akiha's clothes are undisturbed. ―― Even from here, I can understand it all. Her surroundings are distorted like a heat-induced mirage, and it seems more out of this world than the air in the building. "Haa, g, uwaaaaaa―――!" SHIKI claws at his evaporating body. Akiha calmly observes without carelessness. These two's powers― They are fundamentally different. "Amazing―― Akiha-sama, that is―― amazing." Behind me, Hisui speaks in surprise. That's exactly what I'm thinking too. ―― What is this? You can say she is superior, but that's too much. She is too overwhelming "This is it, SHIKI." "Aki--ha." With a ragged breath, SHIKI somehow manages to say his real sister's name. Akiha--she just stares at SHIKI, unmoving. "Why--why are you treating me this way? I'm your true Nii-san." "――――――" Shifting, the distortion around Akiha increases even more. "I love you, Akiha. I only love you. That's why I kept living in that damn basement, trying to kill that impostor and trying to get us back to being brother and sister! ―― So why, why are you getting in my way, Akiha?" "―― I'm not getting in your way. This is nothing more than my duty as the head of the Tohno household---the duty to pass down judgment on all those in the family who stray from being human." "I'm the head of the Tohno household! If he was not here, I would have still been SHIKI. I could have always been your Nii-san. Wake up, Akiha. That impostor is just deceiving you!" The distortion around Akiha increases even more. After closing her eyes briefly, she looks at SHIKI as if she is parting with him. "---I am not being deceived. You are not my Nii-san――!" Skreeeeee! "Aaaahhh――!" SHIKI hides his face with his hands. ―― But that is pointless. I don't understand what kind of power Akiha possesses. But that---takes away heat from everything in her view, anything she can see. It is an inevitable "plunder". Skreeeeeeeeeee! So in the next instant, SHIKI's face will vaporize. Well, it should have. "Shiki-san?" Kohaku-san says this as she realizes our presence. "---Eh?" Akiha turns toward us in surprise. ―― In that brief moment, for just a split second, a complete letting down of her guard. There's no way he would let that chance slip away.

*s412
"Heee!" SHIKI lunges with a cry. His black shape explodes forward like a firework. "Ts--!" Akiha and Kohaku-san both turn. But, it's hopeless. They'll never make it. The black shape isn't going for Akiha. SHIKI lunges not at Akiha, but at Kohaku-san who stands next to her. ---He knows. Just like how I am able to move right now because of Hisui's power, he knows that Akiha's overwhelming power is possible through Kohaku-san's help. "Kohaku―――!" Akiha's voice cannot stop it. "Hee--eeeeeee!" SHIKI raises his voice, and with his arm thrusting like a spear, aims for Kohaku's face. The sound of pierced flesh. "--" My voice dies in my throat. Splat! The sound of blood spurting forth. Kohaku-san's face is splattered, with the redness, of, Akiha's blood. "―― Akiha-sama――?" "Aa" The sound of coughing. Akiha tries to speak, but blood is the only thing that pours from her mouth. That means, the majority of her blood vessels have been destroyed, and all she can do is regurgitate blood. "" I can't speak. My mind is empty. That is, the same as SHIKI, who has just impaled Akiha. "Aah―" SHIKI pulls back his arm. "Uuu?" A thud. Akiha's body falls down on Kohaku-san. "Uwaaaaaaaaaaaa!?" SHIKI swings his blood stained arm around wildly. Every time he waves it around, Akiha's blood paints the wall and ceiling. "AAAAAa, AA, AAAAAAAAAA!" SHIKI shakes his arm desperately. "AAA, Aki, Akiha, Akiha is, Akiha?" SHIKI suddenly stops moving. SHIKI stares at Akiha's blood-drenched body, then looks at his blood-soaked arm--then bolts down the hallway as if running from something. His footsteps lead upstairs. SHIKI has run to the rooftop. But that, I don't care about that. "Akiha――― Akiha!" Still unable to think, I run to her. Kohaku-san is still standing in a daze, her amber eyes nothing more than jewels devoid of emotion. I crouch down next to Akiha's body. Akiha just lies on the floor, powerless, with terribly calm eyes. "Akiha――!" I can't tell her--it's alright. Even with my glasses on---I, can, see, them. "Akiha--Akiha!" These are the only words that I can think of. Akihawith her calm, gentle eyes, looks up at me. "―― Nii-san―― why, are you, here――?" She coughs. More blood trickles from her mouth. "!" ―― I can see them. The lines of death on her body are spreading across her body with gruesome speed. This is― fatal. The fact that she's still alive must simply be due to her unnatural Tohno blood. "God---damn it, why――!?" Even though---I understand death better than anyone else, I don't want to believe it. "Don't move――! I'll help you right away――!" Taking off my shirt, I put it on Akiha's chest. Trying to cover up her wound, I tie it up. The blood soaks the shirt in matter of seconds. It doesn't do anything. As if trying to hold off my weeping emotions, I push against it. ---All I can do is push. "Hey―― answer me." In a daze. Akiha says this to me like she does not see me pushing against her wound. "Nii-san, why, are, you here? I'm curious, so I can't rest until I know. Things I don't understand, they make me angry--you know that, right?" "---" "Oh yeah, that's right," I nod. Her wound keeps bleeding. The shirt is too soaked, it can't stop the bleeding. Damn it---this crappy shirt. Why does it have to soak so fast? I'm pissed. At the useless shirt, my useless self. Really, really, not being able to stop just one wound, I--- "―― Stupid. Why, you ask? This is my school. Even though it's late, it's not that strange for me to be here." I hold back my tears. I answer as best as I can. "Ah, I seethis isn't like me at all. I didn't― even― think of that at all―" Akiha sounds satisfied. She doesn't even seem to be in pain. Only, her body warmth starts to disappear. Like pure white ice melting under the sun. Does she understand what is happening, or maybe it is because she does understand---she speaks normally as if we were talking during breakfast. "Hey, did you hear about what we were talking about?" "---Yeah, sorry, but I heard." "O, oh. You know now. ―― I'm such an idiot, letting you hear it, the person I didn't want to let hear the most." "Don't speak――! It's okay, so relax. Please――― please." I roll up my shirt and tie it around her body. I know it's useless. But, if I don't do anything, I don't think I can stay sane. "--I'm sorry. I, I've deceived you all this time. I've kept secrets about many, so many things." "―― It's okay. I don't care about it. So please--" "Nii-san--you are not my real brother. I was― a, horrible, woman. I wanted you, to always, always be by my side, so I― told― all those, stupid, lies." So this is my punishment. With her trembling lips, Akiha says those words clearly. The blood doesn't stop. I'll go crazy at this rate. "―― I knew. I already knew. So don't worry about it." I grip her hand tightly. She takes a deep breath. Akiha gives a strange smile. "―― Nii-san, you knew? ―― Then, I didn't, have to, hold back." I really am an idiot. Her lips shape those words. She should have said it. She should have voiced it. But Akiha, did not do so. "―― Akiha?" There is no reply. What I am holding right now is not breathing. "Hey!" There is no response. What I am holding is what used to be Tohno Akiha. "Say something!" There will never be an answer. What I am holding has closed her eyes calmly "Akiha!!!" I shake her body. Even though---I understand better than anyone else, that it has no meaning. "―― Shiki-sama, please---" Hisui places her hand on mine. "Ah―" Without even realizing it, I was making her body dirty. I---like an idiot, I made her body dirty. "" Quietly, I place her on the floor. The school building is horribly quiet. Hisui and I are wordlessly frozen. Only---only Kohaku-san seems to have regained the power to move. "I wonder where SHIKI-sama went to?" SHI, KI. Those words catapult my consciousness back. "Nee-san, don't say that now---" "No---Kohaku-san is right." I stand up. It's a good thing---it really is a good thing I brought my knife. "P―― please stop, Shiki-sama――! You, you don't have to do such a dangerous thing. SHIKI will not last long with that wound anyways." "―― No. Akiha went that far since she could not let SHIKI, the killer, be alive any longer. For Akiha's sake, I can't leave him be." I say this as I push her away. That's a lie. More than that just cause "I have to settle this with him here and now." I hate him. To put it simply, I just want to kill him. "Don't follow me. Both of you stay here and take care of Akiha." Kohaku-san nods. Hisui uneasily watches me as I run up the stairs. The rooftop. The moon hangs in the sky. That wild beast is crouching on the concrete. "SHIKI." I remove my glasses. I look at his "death". *pant*---*pant*---*pant*---! Crouching, SHIKI is biting his own arms. There--exists no trace of sanity. Perhaps what happened caused him to go insane. "――――――" That pisses me off. I---I am not able to lose my sanity for Akiha's sake. Underneath the moonlight. Even though I've known him for so long, I take my first step towards the enemy I just met tonight. "SHIKI---Akiha is dead." "Ah-" SHIKI looks at me with bloodshot eyes. His face is half gone, but he still isn't dead. The powers of those of Tohno blood---Shiki's power is "immortality". That must mean it is harder for him to die, more likely for him to live on. "Ha―" That's funny. For me, that means nothing. "You look ugly." "SHUT―― UP!" SHIKI gets up with a sharp breath. "SHUT, UP! SHUT U--P. SHUT UP!" Like a broken record, he repeats the same thing. "SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUT UP, SHUTUPSHUTUP, SHUTUPSHUTUP, SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP, SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP--!!!!" "――――――" "Just shut the hell up!" Panting furiously, SHIKI just shouts. "You're always, always noisy! What kind of grudge do you have against me!? Why are you always getting in my way!?" SHIKI screams around while staggering around. I--- "What---are you―" ---I don't get it. "Just shut up! Just leave me alone--don't look inside me, don't use my dreams―――!! You, you, you, you're always watching me, that's why I'm so full of uneasiness!" SHIKI claws at his head. "Wha" ―― I never even thought about that. I've always seen him, tracking him in my dreams. But― It never even occurred to me how SHIKI would feel about being tracked. "―― Get out. Get out of me. Get out of my house, get out of my name. You're in my way, you're in my way, you're in my way, I'll!!!!" SHIKI is screaming like a child. "―― Hmph. Same goes for you." I raise my knife. I never thought to understand him in the first place. I---I came here for a deathmatch. "Fine, let's fight to the death! All those who get in my way are my enemy. I'll kill you all. You, you, Akiha, Kohaku! Just like that old man who wanted to lock me up till I died, I'll kill you all――!" SHIKI screams like a raving lunatic. His figure really is ugly. "HA, HAHA, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" And then. SHIKI attacks me head on. ---Because of his fight with Akiha, SHIKI does not have a functional body. So, it was easy. SHIKI runs---or so he thinks, and I avoid his arm, which is swung slower than walking speed. I slice the "line" from the top of his head to his abdomen. "Gi--" Thud. SHIKI's body loses power and collapses onto mine. "See, it's simple. Your lines are too clear." SHIKI's death looked like an iron shaft was sticking out of his head. "See. That's what I meant by ugly." "Ha――― haha, ha." SHIKI just laughs. There, no intelligence exists. "AHA, HAHAHA, AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Laughing, and dying. His arms leaning on me fall to the ground. SHIKI dies. Before he does, he looks up at me, curiously. "--Who― are you?" "―― Eh?" "Who--are you?" "What are you saying? I'm the Tohno Shiki you were always targeting." "Ah, I see. You're Shiki." SHIKI collapses to the ground. "What's this? You look nothing― like what I heard." SHIKI collapses and his body disperses into the wind. --It's over. With this, it's over. But, I don't feel anything. I won't feel those splitting headaches, I can return to life as normal--but I don't feel happy. What I've lost, is far greater. But, what is over? "Why?" I feel dizzy. SHIKI's last words won't fade away. Something did end. But I don't know what ended, or in the beginning, what I was trying to end. "" I look up at the moon. In the vague darkness, my heart is enthralled. Until Hisui came, I just stood in dumb amazement, standing in the moonlight. The next week passed like it was just a dream. Just like SHIKI's dead body, Akiha's remains dissolved into nothingness. The whole affair did not leak out to the public and was taken care of by the people of the Tohno family. I stayed in the mansion, becoming the successor to the Tohno household in Akiha's place. For now, it is just in name, but I guess it's not something that can be determined easily. Since SHIKI died, my body returned to health and I'm allowed to lead a normal life. As for everything else, only a little has changed since before. My happy school life without Akiha. My life at the mansion with Hisui and Kohaku-san. I, Tohno Shiki, think the whole incident that occurred after I came to the mansion ended. However. There is still a matter that I have to take care of. If I think about it, there was a slight discrepancy. It was something so small that if I didn't question it, I would never have noticed. That night. If SHIKI did not leave those words before he died. ―― The discrepancies between my memories, and what Kohaku-san and Hisui told me. SHIKI had a grudge against Makihisa. SHIKI had a grudge against the old man because he was going to be locked away his entire life, even though my old man wanted to return SHIKI to the mansion as early as possible. SHIKI thought of me as the target of revenge, but he never showed up in front of me and he did not even know what I looked like. And one more thing. That one dream, where SHIKI was violating that one doll-like girl. That― is probably. A clear holiday afternoon. I told Hisui to go shopping. I asked her for a lot, so she shouldn't be back until evening. The only ones in the mansion are me and her. I leave in her room a note that says I want to talk to her. It is almost the promised time. I have to go to that place. When I get there, she is already there, waiting for me. "Lovely weather, isn't it, Shiki-san?" I nod. She smiles cheerfully at me. "You realized it, didn't you, Shiki-san?" I nod. Her smile does not fade. Always―― her smile does not go away no matter what happens. Come to think of it, the expressionless Hisui actually showed a lot of different feelings. From the outside, she appeared to be a heartless doll, but her heart was not a doll's. However--what about this girl? The always, ever smiling Kohaku. No matter what happens, always a smile, like a person with the heart of a doll. Even when Akiha died, that smile did not fade--her smile that is just like a mask. That smile. "―― Kohaku-san. You're the one who made SHIKI go crazy, right?" "Yes." "And the reason you were sharing your blood with Akiha, was to make her not human?" "Yes." "And you lied to SHIKI, and made him attack innocent people." "Yes." "When we were small, the one watching us from a distance wasn't Hisui, it was you, Kohaku." "Yes." "Back then, you intentionally distracted Akiha!" "Yes." "And then you suggested that I kill SHIKI!" "Yes." "―― All of it, all of it is how you planned it out, Kohaku――?" Still smiling, she nods. "That's right. All of it was something I wished would happen, Shiki-san." Still, she smiles. I feel a chill and unknowingly take a step back. "Why---why, did you do these things?" "Oh my. You know already. There are only one or two reasons why I would do all of this." "―― Revenge―" "Ah, I think that's it. For the sake of revenge, I decided that every one of the Tohnos should die." "Revenge―― Is it because like me, you had your parents killed by Tohno Makihisa?" "Oh, don't be silly. Hisui-chan and I were orphans. We don't even know what our parents looked like." "So why!?" "Who knows. I don't even remember how I felt back then. All I know is the reason." "Reason? What reason?" "Let's see― such as getting abused by Makihisa-sama? That is the reason why Hisui-chan and I were adopted in the first place. In order to stay human, he needed our abilities as Synchronizers. Shiki-san, you've done it with Hisui-chan, right? It is said that sexual intercourse is the best way to share energy." "--" I--knew that already. Then that means--in other words-- "Makihisa-sama was really pushed to his limits. I think he was too desperate to consider my age. I was chosen first for a simple reason. He probably thought that since I wasn't talkative and was quiet, I wouldn't resist like the energetic Hisui-chan would have." Even now, her smile, does not fade. "Makihisa-sama wasn't really a bad person. Only sometimes, he would turn violent because of his Tohno blood. So, for those times, he had me ready in his room, and he let those feelings out on me. I guess it is called sexual abuse. But I don't really remember much of it. It was just like a daily routine for him to want me, so if I tried to remember something like that, my brain would explode, wouldn't it?" "Oh, but I remember clearly the first time it happened. It was on my eighth birthday. Makihisa-sama said he had a present for me, so I quietly but excitedly went into his room." As if she is having fun, she gives her usual laugh. "Every day, he got a little worse. But that couldn't really be helped. I was merely a child, so my abilities as a Synchronizer weren't fully developed. That's why he needed Hisui-chan's help too. But, since I was the older sister, I just thought I shouldn't allow her to cry." "So, I took in everything Makihisa-sama wanted to do. I asked him not to touch Hisui-chan because I would take everything myself. He was probably ashamed and agreed to my request. He probably also thought it was better that as few people knew about this secret as possible." "That's how I came to stay in Makihisa-sama's room, our relationship a secret from everyone else. During that time, I was able to think about things a little bit, I think. I always thought about how to get away, how to run away with Hisui-chan. But I didn't know where to go, and the more I submitted my body to Makihisa-sama, the more I broke down. Eventually, I got tired of thinking and I realized that if I didn't think, it wouldn't hurt." "I am just a doll. A doll doesn't know pain. A doll doesn't think. I endured Makihisa-sama thinking like that. Then, it mysteriously did not hurt as much as before. Makihisa-sama's breath didn't make me sick, his arms were just like warm meat, and even if he strangled my neck or kicked me in the stomach, it seemed like he was doing it to someone else. And every day got a little easier." "Shiki-san, I wanted Hisui-chan to stay clean. For her sake, I could endure any kind of abuse. But, it was so hard. Not Makihisa-sama's abuse. I couldn't understand you, and that made me scared." "Scared―― of me?" "Yes. The way you played innocently was like a different world to me. I looked out the window to see all of you play when Makihisa-sama wasn't looking." "I didn't understand any of that. I didn't understand why you did those pointless things. It was strange for me to think so since it was just another world and I couldn't be involved in it. I wasn't jealous of you, and I didn't hate the Tohno children. All I did was stare at all of you, while having this unknown feeling. But, I was afraid that feeling would turn me back into a human." "And two years later, you were killed by SHIKI-sama. You probably don't remember it, but SHIKI-sama was trying to kill Akiha-sama. But you suddenly came, and you shielded Akiha-sama. You weren't related to her, and you had everything stolen from you by the Tohno family, but you still died protecting her." "At that time, I was watching Akiha-sama, who was holding onto your dead body painfully but happily. Oh, maybe I made up my mind back then. That it would suit Akiha-sama for her to die just like you did." "Wha!" "Wait, Shiki-san. If you want to know the reason, you have to be patient." "―――" I stop my rush towards her. "Days later, you were brought back to the mansion and you were going to be adopted by the Arimas. That was really a secret, but I overheard it from Makihisa-sama. That's how I knew you would be leaving. I didn't have time to tell Akiha-sama or Hisui-chan. When I thought that I couldn't see that boy again, without even getting to talk to himmy legs strangely moved, and I ran down the hallway and found him, but I couldn't think of anything to say. So I gave him my ribbon, the only thing that I owned." "I heard that the Tohno family members were going to terminate SHIKI-sama soon after that. Makihisa-sama didn't want to kill his own son, so he secretly locked him away underground. He said SHIKI-sama would return to normal and asked me to take care of him." "――――――" Oh, of course--that's how it was. So that dream was real. It wasn't that I wanted to abuse Hisui or Kohaku-san. That--was in reality. SHIKI― did that to her "After gaining some freedom from Makihisa-sama, I became a little happy. But, it was the same. SHIKI-sama was just like his father and only used me to let out his feelings." "I think that had to have been what destroyed my last emotions. I desperately thought about how I could break free from everything. Then, I easily came up with a solution. The whole Tohno family just had to disappear. If not only Makihisa-sama but SHIKI-sama did those painful things, then that's the only possible thing to do, right? And when I realized that, I laughed for the first time in years. I was surprised that it was so simple and I didn't even realize it before." "From that time, I was able to start moving on my own. The hardest thing for me was to find a reason to move. A doll can't move by itself. Without a spring or strings, it can't act like a human. So, once I found a reason, everything became simple. All I needed to do was to place mistrust between them by making SHIKI-sama reject Makihisa-sama. SHIKI-sama said that he wanted to drink blood, so I gave him mine and told him that he wasn't a bad person and I kept him the way he was." "When SHIKI-sama became sick, I took care to make special medicine for him. Oh, it's the same as the one I gave you. You know those morning glories in the garden behind the mansion? They are called Chosen morning glories and have three kinds of mental effects. In simple terms, it's a drug that makes people hallucinate. Once they are unconscious, they listen to what I tell them, and when they wake up, they don't remember a thing. Quite convenient, don't you think? Because I was educated to become Makihisa-sama's personal doctor, I know a lot about these sorts of things." "With things like that, SHIKI-sama went crazy at my convenience. After that, it was even easier. I secretly told Akiha-sama to look inside Makihisa-sama's room around midnight, and she finally found out about our relationship. Since then, Akiha-sama felt guilty and it became easier to do a lot of things." "Well, I didn't expect her to protest against him right away though. But because Akiha-sama pressed the issue, I was released from Makihisa-sama soon after. ―― I thought that I wouldn't be free until SHIKI-sama killed Makihisa-sama, but I was freed four years earlier, actually. From then on, I became a normal servant and traded places with Hisui, who became silent. Oh, but don't worry since I was the one who took care of SHIKI-sama and Makihisa-sama. Hisui-chan was always clean of everything." Smiling, she ends her story. "―――――" I don't know what to say. Even if Tohno Makihisa was the main cause, the one who wished it to turn out this way, and made it turn out this way is this girl before me. "But Shiki-san. I didn't hate Akiha-sama or SHIKI-sama. I didn't even want to do it. Those are my true feelings." "--" ―― How can she say that now? "But, there wasn't anything else I could do. Without a purpose like that, I couldn't live. A doll cannot move on its own. Without anything to guide it, it can't move." "But still--" ―― That is unforgivable. "There wasn't anything I ever wished from my heart. But it's strange. Everyone seriously accepts what I say. Just the words of a ten-year-old child can manipulate their feelings. Aren't coincidences scary?" Kohaku giggles. "--Are you satisfied, Kohaku?" "I don't know. I'm merely a doll that doesn't feel happiness or sadness." I thought she'd say that. ―― Before me is a human that is a doll. A girl whose emotions were exhausted so long ago. Nothing remains. Telling herself that she is a doll that doesn't feel any pain. More than half of her really believes it. That's why injuries don't hurt her. SHIKI and Akiha died, but she doesn't feel happy or sad. She is just, an empty shell manipulated by strings. "But" "Eh?" "But, there was just one strange thing." Really just a little bit. She said that as her eyes trailed off into the distance. "Akiha-sama protected me in the end. I knew there was a fifty-fifty chance she would do that. I stayed close to her for that reason. Revealing Makihisa-sama's abuse and devotedly helping Akiha-sama who was slowly turning nonhuman. ---Yes that's right. Really, I knew she would die protecting me." That smile. Even though she is smiling, she looks really sad, as if she's-- "ButI was really surprised at the time. Why is she protecting me? Why is she protecting me, risking her life?" ---She looks like she might burst into tears. "I still don't actually understand if I was actually happy or sad when Akiha-sama died. But when I wake up in the morning, I take tea to her room even though I know she is gone. Isn't this strange? Even though there's no one in that room anymore." She takes something out. The sound of moving cloth. Holding something long wrapped in cloth, she aims for her chest. A shining blade reflects the sunlight. "Ko!" I run. But, she is much faster. ---A small sound. And she collapses to the ground. She stabs herself, and falls to the ground. Even though I ran, it's already too late. It has pierced her heart. My mind reels. Without reason. "Wha--why―――!?" I hold her in my arms. Fresh blood blossoms from her chest like a flower. Her smile still does not fade. On the contrary, it seems indescribably pitiful. "Hang in there―! Why, why did you do that―!" "Because revenge was the only thing I could doI can only disappear when it's all over. I tried to find new springs, but I could never find one, and time ran out." She smiles. That― for no reason at all "What the hell is that? What are you saying―!" I look at the wound like I did to Akiha. ---She won't make it. It has pierced her heart. "―――" Why? There was no reason---I just can't bear the sadness. ―― She's looking up to the blue sky with thinned eyes. Under the tree in the courtyard. Eight years ago, when I was leaving this mansion, the place where the girl who was just looking out the window gave me a ribbon as a present. This is― where we promised to meet again, under this big tree. "That ribbon, it was my favorite." She speaks lightly. "That's why I asked you to return it when we met again. But you didn't keep your promise, Shiki-san." "But--that―" I was mistaken, and thought it was Hisui's "I made a little bet with myself. That if that boy noticed that I switched places with Hisui-chanthen I would quit everything." "Wha---what is that? Are you trying to make me responsible for it at the end―!" As I shout, my hand desperately tries to stop her bleeding. But, death truly is miserable. Ruthless, and accurate, without even a delay or the failure of a single second. The clock of her life counts down to zero. "Damn it, don't be ridiculous! What the hell do you mean you made a bet!? Because of you Akiha was, Akiha was" I frantically try to stop the bleeding. Sad, without a reason. The tears flow from my eyes. "Huh? You're crying, Shiki-san." "---Well excuse me! Damn it! I know it's your fault, damn it, so why do I" That's right--- "Kohaku, I still don't want you to die, damn it――!" Tears flow down. She smiles again. "Shiki-san, you are too kind. But please don't worry about it. I'm just a doll, so I don't feel pain or fear." "That again---why do you---" "But it is much easier this way. Being a human, everything is painful and it hurts too much. But no one saved me, I couldn't escape." She exhales slightly. She closes her eyes and remembers. "I just remembered something. ―― It was when I was a child. I was scared and hurt, but more scared of dying. Tohno Makihisa was huge, like a demon out of a story book. The mansion was too big, like a haunted house. Every day was cold, and it was my daily routine to cry and scream. But if I raised my voice, it got worse, so I had to endure it all." "But, my sister was playing outside. She was laughing under the sun by easily jumping out the window of the haunted house, where I could not get out, no matter how much I wished for it. ―― Come to think of it, everything was sad. That's why. That's why I wanted to become a doll that didn't feel pain." The bleeding doesn't stop. With her eyes still closed, she remembers the childhood filled only with pain. "I don't like pain. That's why I thought it would be better to become a doll." "Ko―― haku?" "And gradually, my body stopped generating a pulse. Blood vessels turned into tubes one by one. Blood vanished like vapor. My heart, everything, just crafted parts. If I did that, there would be no more pain, right?" "Wha――――――――" I can't say anything. A girl who thought she was a doll. A girl who couldn't live without thinking that she was a doll. Kohaku had no other means of salvation but to maintain an illusion that she really was a doll. "That's why, even if you are this kind, there is no need for tears. It's just a doll breaking." Kohaku still keeps her eyes closed. ---No, that is wrong. I grasp her hand, and shake my head in refusal. "No―! Kohaku, you are human. You can't be a doll―! Kohaku, you're alive, you're a living human being―! As proof, you are bleeding red blood right now!" "Ah, that's right." She laughs again. "―― Right? You're a normal girl who liked Akiha, was always worried about Hisui, and laughed when we talked about stupid things. So" Even if she wished it and caused the deaths of Akiha and SHIKI― "--Kohaku, there was no reason for you to die." Increasing my grip, I say these words from the bottom of my heart. "―― Huhu. Shiki-san, you are just the boy I thought you would be. I―― finally got to speak to you." Her heartbeat. Her heartbeat surges like it is a grand finale. Her chest rises and falls. ―― Her closed eyes open. At the very end. She looks at the deep, distant blue sky. "I see---I guess it was only an illusion after all." She coughs up blood. It hurts. She whispers softly. "That's why--I wanted to be a doll." Then, she passes away. The hollow eyes endlessly look into the blue sky. Not a fake smile, but a quiet and very sad face. Leaving my room, I head towards the gate. After a quiet meal together, we leave the garden behind. "Please be careful, Shiki-sama. It has become cold recently, so do not strain yourself." "Yeah. Don't strain yourself either, Hisui." Taking my bag from Hisui, I turn my back to the mansion. The road is long, as if it goes on forever. The gently sloping road, and the blue sky that might suck me in. I see an illusion. The road, like a ladder, heading to the sky, trying to reach the clear, blue sky. ---I see that, and for no reason. I remember that sorrowful affair. "Hisui." "Yes. What is it, Shiki-sama?" "―― Mm, tomorrow is the start of winter break, right? I'll come straight home, so how about we go to town? I have something I want to talk about, too." "Huh--? To town?" "Yeah. Once it is winter vacation, let's take a trip somewhere. ―― Well, I don't know where yet, so I was thinking of letting you decide." Hisui stands there in silence. ―― That's right. Hisui doesn't leave the mansion for herself. Kohaku-san was always the one to take care of things outside, so Hisui never left for eight years. ―― It isn't that I don't like that fact. Only, it's just that, I wanted to go somewhere new with Hisui and wanted to increase our fun memories so we won't lose against all the sad memories. "What do you think? If you don't want to, I don't mind either way." "No, if I get to be with you, it would make me very happy. I--will look forward to it." "I see. Then, I'll be back before noon. Please be waiting in some regular clothes. Then we'll figure out what to do―― and maybe a terrible guy might come along too, but we'll deal with it then if it happens." Hisui tilts her head questioningly, but agrees. ―― When I go to school, I will end up asking for suggestions from Arihiko, but considering him, he will want to come along. ---Well, that's that. I can ask his sister to come along too and going with a lot of people might not be bad either. "Well, I'm off. Thanks for sending me off, Hisui!" Saying that, I run down the hill. The road is long, and continues into the town. I run under the clear blue sky and feel the warmth of Hisui's gaze on my back. And, I see him off. This daily task done, I close the gate. The only one left in the mansion is me. Nee-san and Akiha-sama are no longer here. And it seems that no new servants or masters will be coming. His sister left him this mansion and some money. Since the money that is used to maintain this place will be paid by the members of the branched Tohno family, it seems we will not have to leave here anytime soon. ---Once vacation starts, do you want to take a trip? I decided to nod to those words. ―― Ever since that day, I forbade myself from leaving this mansion. Ever since I found out Makihisa-sama was using Nee-san like that in my place, I hated going outside. Isn't it natural? Nee-san did that so I would stay clean. So, I had to stay clean, no matter what. I would not let any male touch me. I would never touch the fingers of the gender that used my sister like that. I thought it would be better if I was just like a machine. If I went outside, I would get dirty, so it would be better if I stayed inside. If I locked myself away in the sterile mansion, I would never become dirty. Because Nee-san protected me. I thought the only thing I could do was become like a doll, staying pretty forever. "―― But, I will end that, will I not? I am thinking of going outside, Nee-san." Once it gets close to noon, I change my clothes. ―― It's been years since I last wore my own clothes. Pushing my hands through the sleeves, I am amazed at how light it is. That maid uniform I got used to so much, compared to these light regular clothes, is really heavy. "Ah." A wind blows. The hair ribbon that was in my hand flies off. It is white. It was a lone memory that a girl gave to him a long time ago. The ribbon flies up and up. Riding the wind, as if it was never there before, it vanishes into the forest. "Wait, that was" I try to chase after it, and I stop. That was the girl's ribbon. It is not mine, so I guess I have to at least give that back to her. In my hand, I hold a promise. That awaited promise of the girl who gave that ribbon still lives inside of me. So---just that ribbon, at least. I think it tried to return to the place the girl dreamed of. "" Promises are fulfilled. If he thought I was that girl, then I will have to fulfill her dream. Like how I love him. That girl had to have always loved him too. Come to think of it, we really were sisters alike each other. Nee-san and I traded places, but Nee-san really did a perfect job of acting out my part. That carefree smile. Those straightforward emotions. And that fleeting experience of love with him, those were all real. Even though it was just an elaborate play, Nee-san really did love him when she played my role. She played my part perfectly, and she loved him from the bottom of her heart. ―― Long ago. As if watching a dream that girl always wished and waited for. "That's why, Nee-san. That's why I have to return to myself." I don't think I can do it right away, but I can do it gradually. Maybe I won't be able to behave exactly as I was back then, but with all my strengthI must fulfill her dream, as I am right now. After the boy left, Nee-san acted like me because she wanted to do that. ―― Her dream was always to be Hisui and to love Tohno Shiki. So I will grant her dream. For the sake of my childhood dream, and for Nee-san's dream, I will always---always be by his side. "Ah--" I hear noisy voices in the distance. ―― It seems like he has returned, but it is noisy. ―― He is not alone, but it looks like he brought some friends. --A voice calls my name. Checking myself in the reflection off a window, I hurry to the entrance. ---The sky, the infinite deep, blue, sky. Hisui greets the long-awaited boy, takes delight in such normal things, and returns a smile. That is something that will continue tirelessly, day after day. The long-awaited peaceful world. I have been waiting for it for so, so long. Always believing that one day I would be flying freely, I always stood by the window, looking up at the deep sky. That one day, wings would sprout from this world. And wings would sprout from this back. And I will smile like Nee-san with that boy. --This is what the little girl, so long ago, dreamed of--

*s413
"Heee!" SHIKI lunges with a cry. His black shape explodes forward like a firework. "Ko-" I can't make it from here. If there's anything that would make it, that would be "Dam---" Akiha turns towards SHIKI. Akiha instantly prepares for his attack. But the black figure isn't going towards Akiha. SHIKI lunges not at Akiha, but at Kohaku-san who stands next to her. "Koha-" ---He knows. Just like I am able to move right now because of Hisui's power― He knows that Akiha's overwhelming power is possible from Kohaku-san's help. "Kohaku-san, get down-!" I shout. Like if I knew SHIKI was going for Kohaku all along, I shout from the bottom of my lungs. "Kohaku―――!" Akiha throws her body in front of Kohaku. -I don't believe it. Is she sacrificing her body to protect Kohaku-san? "Hee---eeeeeee!" SHIKI raises his voice, and with his arm thrusting like a spear, aims for Kohaku's face. Akiha forces herself in between them. Her timing is perfect. I don't want to look. I don't want to see Akiha die as she protects Kohaku-san. "N-o――!!!!" Right before it all happens, I hear a voice which I've never heard before: Kohaku-san's crying voice. The sound of rending flesh. Red blood drips down onto the hallway. "Eh-" Kohaku-san's voice almost sounds absent-minded. She has quickly pushed Akiha away. She pushed Akiha trying to protect her, and threw herself in front of SHIKI's claws. "Y-you!" SHIKI's voice quivers with anger. ―― Red blood continues to flow forth. "Ah--no, no, Akiha. I, didn't mean, to hurt you" He shakes his head. In front of SHIKI, Akiha lies collapsed, her arm coated with blood. ―― Thanks to Kohaku-san pushing her away, it seems only Akiha's arm was shredded by SHIKI's claws. "―― G―― wah!" Lying on the ground, Akiha writhes in agony, clutching her arm. SHIKI stands dumbstruck, shaking as he looks down. Kohaku-san, fixated with surprise, stands there unmoving, like a doll. "You-you bitch, are you trying to get in my way――!?" SHIKI lifts his head. Kohaku-san is in front of him. ―― Why is it? She is just standing there, not moving a muscle, as if her soul had fled her body. "Youyou, also get in my way―――!?" SHIKI howls. "Shiki-sama―――!" Hisui's pleading voice. She doesn't even have to tell me. Like Kohaku-san protecting Akiha, this time, I'll stop him for sure――! "SHIKI――――!" I run, my glasses already off. The lines I see are across his neck and from his upper left chest to his stomach. ―― Either one will do. If I work my knife through either one, it will surely kill him. Gripping my knife firmly, I fly down the hallway with a speed that surprises even myself. "--!" SHIKI turns towards me. But, I'm much faster. "Kuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!?" His anguished cry reverberates through the hallway. "Hii--ha, hahahahahahaha!" An insane laugh. It was too shallow. How naive. In front of Akiha---I hesitated in cutting her real brother's neck. The line that runs through his body. I was only able to cut it halfway. "Hiha, hahahahahahahahahaha!" Laughing wildly, SHIKI pulls back. Like that, he escapes towards the stairs. ―― Following him would be easy. But there's something more important for me to do. "Akiha! Hang in there, Akiha――!" Kneeling down, I look over her body. ―― This is terrible. Her right arm is almost split in two and painted an awful crimson. "―― Ah―― Nii-sa―― why―― are you here" Her eyes are hazy. Her shallow breathing, her pale face. ―― The figure of death stretches across her body. "―― Why, aren't―― you, resting, in your, room―――?" "Ddon't talk――! We can talk about it later, for now, just don't talk――!" "―― No, ――― I won't―― Nii-san, how long, have you, been, here" It's spreading. With her bleeding, her lines of death spread across her body. "It's alright, just be quiet――! Please---I beg of you, for now, just calm down, please――――!" "―――――――――― Okay. If you say so---then I will, be obedient, Nii-san" With a forced smile, Akiha closes her mouth. ―― No, that― Simply put, she's so weak she can't even speak. "N---no―――!!!! Wait, I'll stop the bleeding――!" Taking off my shirt, I wrap it around her arm. "Damnthis is useless――! Shit――! If the bleeding doesn't stop, she'll die, why doesn't―――!" I frantically tie it around her arm. ―― I know that it will not help her at all, but I can't think of anything else to do. I― I know that I'm starting to go crazy, but I still cannot calm myself. "Shiki-sama, please calm down――! If you tie it any tighter, it will not help her." "Hisui---but!" "―― It is alright! Akiha-sama will not die. If Nee-san is here, Akiha-sama will heal. ―― Nee-san, is that not right?" Hisui pulls Kohaku-san, who's still standing like a motionless doll, and sits her next to Akiha. "―― Nee-san. For now, please synchronize with Akiha-sama. You destroyed everything because you wanted Akiha-sama saved, is that not right?" "-" Hisui wraps both of her hands around Kohaku-san's white hand. But Kohaku-san's gaze is still empty. But---maybe Hisui's words reach her after all. Akiha's blood stops spilling forth. "Haah." ―― I relax. With this---I can be assured. The uneasiness that gripped me before. The uneasiness that Akiha would meet the worst fate starts to gradually disappear. "" Akiha will be helped by Hisui and Kohaku-san. So. As Tohno Shiki, I will have to end this. "--Hisui. I leave Akiha and Kohaku-san up to you." "―― Shiki-sama, you are still planning to go, are you not?" "-We are the same type, he and I. The least I can do is put him to rest." "―――――――" Hisui wordlessly stares at me. ―― Her eyes beg me not to go, but I can't listen to them. "―― Thanks for everything up until now, Hisui. I'm so glad you were with me." I walk away. Feeling her watch me as I leave, I follow after SHIKI. ---The path of blood continues. Maybe he didn't try to really escape, or maybe he isn't even sane enough to understand what running away means. SHIKI is standing in the hallway as if waiting for me. "-SHIKI!" I call out. SHIKI looks over at me with his unfocused eyes. "Ha--you again?" SHIKI doesn't move. ―― Probably because of the wounds by me and Akiha. He doesn't have a body that can move properly. "ShitI failed again. It won't work out right. Why is everything getting ruined――!? It won't work, it never works out right, I always mess up―――!!!! That's strange, why is she getting in my way!? He, he came just like I was told, so why does he always always always always always always always always always always always always get in my way!?" ―― SHIKI's eyes are just hollow orbs. Maybe he didn't even see anyone from the very beginning? He only sees me before him, holding my knife, as just another obstacle. "SHIKI. Are you, in pain?" "In pain? Me? Why?" SHIKI laughs as if it is so funny, and slowly stands up. "I'm not in any pain. This is a wonderful life. No matter what I do, no one can punish me." SHIKI's eyes burn with the desire to kill. ―― It seems he's ready. Underneath the moonlight. Even though I've known him for so long, I take my first step towards the enemy I just met tonight. "Fine, let's fight to the death! All those who get in my way are my enemy. I'll kill you all. You, you, Akiha, Kohaku! Just like that old man who wanted to lock me up till I died, I'll kill you all――!" SHIKI screams like a raving lunatic. ---Maybe because that figure looks terribly pitiful. Even though this is a fight to the death, I remain cool and collected, like ice. "HA, HAHA, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" SHIKI attacks me head on. "--" It's nothing difficult. Like I'm cutting meat on a plate, I easily slice through Tohno SHIKI. Thud. SHIKI's head falls to the floor. His powerless body falls against mine. "-" I don't feel anything. I don't feel regret, pain, hatred, or disgust. Like Kohaku-san was earlier, I just stand like a doll. "Ku--kuku, ku." ―― An unbelievable laughing voice. SHIKI's laughing head rolls on the ground. "You're wonderful---this is the first time I felt this cold pain! What a---what a superb hinderer you are!" Still laughing, his face dissolves into ash. Gradually, it disappears into the wind. SHIKI is disappearing. Before he does, he looks up at me, and curiously says. "---So who are you, anyway?" "―― Eh?" "Who are you?" "―― You don't know? I'm the Tohno Shiki you were always targeting." "Ah, I see. You're Shiki." His disappearing face. "What's this? You look nothing― like what I heard." With that, he completely disappears. ---It's over. With this, it's over. I don't feel anything. I won't feel those splitting headaches, I can return to life as normal--but I don't feel happy. And? Just what ended? "-Why?" I feel dizzy. SHIKI's last words won't fade away. Something did end. But I don't know what ended, or in the beginning, what I was trying to end. "" I look up at the moon. In the vague darkness, my heart is enthralled. Until Hisui came, I just stood in dumb amazement, standing in the moonlight. The next week passed quickly. SHIKI's body vanished without a trace and the wound in Akiha's arm was treated. Even though my place as Tohno Shiki became vague, I can't go back to being Nanaya Shiki. I don't know if she understands my feelings or not about it, but Akiha hasn't said one word about that night. If Akiha, the head of the household, is going to play dumb, then I think I can continue my life as Tohno Shiki. The peaceful days have returned. Since SHIKI disappeared, all my strength returned and Akiha is healing well, too. Kohaku-san and Hisui go back to their regular duties at the mansion and there isn't a trace of uneasiness. ―― I want to believe that there isn't. "Nii-san? It's noon already, Nii-san." ―― I hear a voice. "Geez, even though it's so nice outside, please do not sleep in such a place. If you want to take a nap, do so in your room." ―― Fingers tap my shoulder. "Nnn" With that, I wake from my dream. "――― Nnn, morning, Akiha." "Don't say 'morning!' Coming to the sitting room only to sleep― Just what were you thinking, Nii-san?" "―――――― Well, I was thinking about this and that." Giving a deep sigh, I get up from the sofa. "Wait a minute, Nii-san. Are you going to actually go sleep in your room? ―― Hey, don't you think you should actually do something worthwhile on your day off? To give you examples, like going out to deepen bonds with family members or, or invite them to have fun out of gratitude." "―――――――" I think what Akiha says is worthwhile is very limited. "―― Well, I do think so. It's just that what you think is worthwhile is different from what I think is worthwhile. Sleeping twice would just be a waste. The reason why I want to go to my room is simple. It takes a lot of effort to face you right after waking up, so I though I'd refresh my head in my own room." "Wh, what is that supposed to mean, Nii-san!?" "Nothing, I just can't answer to your all your little scolding when my head's still dozy. So I'm just going to my territory to regroup, that's all. We can talk more during lunch." Waving, I turn away. Akiha watches me silently, but her face tells me she wants to complain. ―― It looks like I will have to be ready during lunchtime. I come to my room. While I was dozing in the sitting room, it looks like Hisui cleaned my room. "―― But, this really is a dull room, if I have to say it myself." Other then a bed and a desk, the room is completely empty. It's close to winter, so I should probably get some heating equipment. Akiha is pretty noisy about it, but I'd never feel like using the fireplace. "――? What's this on the desk" A letter I don't remember about is placed there. I'm curious, so I open it up. "-" ――――――――――――――――― The letter just says "I am waiting underneath that tree." "Why?" Saying that, I crumble the paper. Opening the drawer, I put the knife with the engraving "Nanatsu Yoru" in my pocket. "" ―― I can't pretend like I didn't see it. Taking a deep breath to compose myself, I leave my room. I don't know when I realized it. It all started when I thought that everything turned out pretty conveniently. The happenstances and circumstances surrounding the connection between SHIKI and I were too convenient. SHIKI had his lair at my schoolbut he never attacked me, his most hated enemy. If SHIKI had ever felt like it, I probably would have been killed a long time ago. I could only think that things ended this way because someone readied a convenient plot. When I get there, she is waiting with her usual smile. "You're late, Shiki-san. I've been waiting since morning, but it's noon already." "Yeah, sorry. I fell asleep in the sitting room and just got back to my room." "Ah, I see. ―― I messed up. I knew I should have told you directly." "That may be true," I nod. She smiles at me. "But, it is good you came. Now we can talk, just the two of us." "-" She smiles happily. With a smile on her face, she begins to speak like it's nothing. "You realized it, didn't you, Shiki-san?" "―――――――" I can't nod or shake my head. "I knew it," she laughs. "Shiki-san, I was the one who made SHIKI-sama like that." "――――" ―― That― "I gave Akiha-sama my blood so that she would turn more into one of the Tohno blood." "―――――――" ―― But that―― "I was the one that gave SHIKI-sama wrong information, and made him attack innocent people." "――――――――" I didn't want her to say it. "When we were small, the one who was always watching from the distance wasn't Hisui, it was me." "―――――― Kohaku-san." "Back then, I intentionally distracted Akiha-sama so that SHIKI-sama could have an opening." "―――――― Kohaku." "But I really messed up. Akiha-sama and SHIKI-sama were both supposed to die there---" "Kohakuuuuuuuu!" Looking down, All I could do is shout her name. "―――――――― It's fine." "Shiki-san?" "――――― It's fine. All of it is over, so I-don't want to hear that kind of story." Those words are truly how I feel. Such a reality, it is better if I don't realize it. Kohaku-san can just be Kohaku-san. Always smiling, thinking of Hisui dearly, being such good friends with Akiha, and laughing when we talk about stupid things, I wanted Kohaku-san to stay like that. "---I, I don't care about all that. You can just be here, and it'll be fine." "--" ―― She doesn't answer. A long, painful silence. "No, that won't do, Shiki-san. What I did can't be ignored like that. I failed. I have lost the reason that moved me these past years, so this Kohaku will just disappear." "Wha" I lift my head. Over there She looks like she always does. "But, I thought you had the right to blame me. You are the only one who is not connected with the Tohno house. I used you in my plot against Akiha-sama and SHIKI-sama. So if you wish to blame me, you can do whatever you like." "The rightno one has the right to blame you, Kohaku-san." ―― That's right. Ever since she was a small child and came to this mansion, she had to receive all the crimes of Tohno Makihisa. She could not ask for help, nobody helped her, if she lived that life for years, then that's― "―― If you want to talk about rights, you had to have every right to take revenge. ―― I can only imagine what happened to you, but you only could hold nothing but a grudge against the Tohno family." I know that I'm just sounding clever, but I say those unsatisfactory lies. "No, I didn't have a grudge against Makihisa-sama or Akiha-sama at all. So what I did wasn't revenge. I just thought that was what a human would have done. Only for my sake, I put Makihisa-sama and SHIKI-sama in a trap, and tried to get Akiha-sama dead too. That was all I had. There really weren't any feelings behind it." Her smile does not fade. But that's a lie. If that's true, then I---I would have hated her from the bottom of my heart. "―― No, that's wrong. Kohaku-san, you just want to think that. If that was true---then why did you protect Akiha? Kohaku-san, you had emotions. ―― You liked Akiha, so you destroyed your own plan yourself――!" "--" For just an instant. She lowers her glance just a little bit, and smiles again. "―― That's right. I destroyed my own plan. Really, SHIKI-sama should have killed me back then. ―― I made it so that only one of us would stay alive after that. But why did we both end up surviving? She seemed troubled as she says this, and her smile returns. "―― That's simple. It's because you wanted Akiha to live, and you wanted to stay alive too. Then---everything's alright. Even though you planned it all, I'm happy. Akiha's still alive, and you're still alive, that makes me really happy. Is thatnot enough for you, Kohaku-san?" Tears come out as I say so. ―― I can't stop my feelings, which are more full of regret than pity. I already understand. That this person will not return. Since then, from the time she protected Akiha, she became broken and couldn't come back. I understand that too well- "Shiki-san, are you crying? That's stupid, crying over a doll in a play that broke. ―― Yes, it really is stupid. Hey, Shiki-san. I said that I didn't hate anyone, but there is one person I hated. You understand, right? I think I hated you. Because if you weren't there, I could have just stared out the window without even thinking." Smiling, she turns away. Her sleeves flutter like butterfly wings. My legs want to dash forward. But I can't move. Even one step. I feel that if I move one step towards her---something will happen that I can't take back. "You are the only one I hated. Everyone else, I neither liked nor hated. I lost those emotions. Sosaving Akiha-sama was only an accident." Her figure starts to become hazy. "Kohaku, san---" I have a bad feeling about this. I can't place it, but I have a terrible feeling. ---Then. "Nee-san-!" A voice calling for her echoes through the air. "Hisui--?" "Hisui, chan――?" Our voices overlap. Gasping for breath, Hisui looks directly at her. "―― Hisui-chan, why?" Her voice is shaking. Taking it, she looks sharply at her. "―― Lies." With a short, strong voice, Hisui says so. "Everything you say are lies, Nee-san. You saved Akiha-sama back then because you like her---and I know you can't hate Shiki-sama." "" I hear a sharp gasp. Still turned around---she looks extremely frightened. "Is that not right? You played my role, so you cannot hate Shiki-sama. You played the role of Hisui from back then. So you loved Shiki-sama and tried to protect Akiha-sama――! You're not an empty human like you think you are――!" Hisui's voice hangs in the air. Kohaku doesn't turn back, and just answers "no". "―― Geez. If you had never slept in the sitting room, then Hisui-chan never would have noticed us. Shiki-san, you really do throw all my plans into disarray." Still facing the other way, she laughs. She holds up a finger to her mouth. Gulp. I hear the sound of something being swallowed. "" I run. But, I don't make it in time. Before I can reach her, she collapses to the ground, coughing up blood. Thud. A hard, sickening noise. Still smiling, she drips red blood from her mouth. "Nee-san!" Hisui holds her. But, that. No matter who looks at it, it is already too late. "NoNee-san, Nee-san, Nee-san-!!!!" Cradling the unmoving girl's head, Hisui frantically calls out. It seems her feelings overflow like the blood pouring from Kohaku's mouth. Her mouth opens and closes over and over. "Nee-san――? Nee-san, hold on――!!" A desperate cry. Seeing that, the girl smiles like a child. "―― Huh? ―― Don't do that, Hisui-chan. Crying like that, it feels―― like back then." "What---Nee-san, why" "―― Yeah, because if I, don't do, so, you won't be, able to return, to the way, you were." Her words in pieces, and with glazed eyes, she speaks to Hisui. "-Nee, san." Hisui's face contorts in grief. Her tears flood her face. "―― Why? That's fine. I was okay with the way I was. If you were happy, then I was happy. I---I was always protected by you, so---" I was always happy. Painfully, she swallows her last words. "Why――? You should have stayed like Hisui, Nee-san. Like Hisui, the one you admired long ago, so why---why are you returning it to me now" A tear falls. Maybe Hisui's tears caused that. She nods quietly. "―― That's, right. I, really, had fun. It was all just an act, but it was really fun, Hisui-chan. So I hoped, Hisui-chan, you were having fun, too" Her blood drips out. As she speaks, blood dribbles out of her mouth. "Ne--Nee-san, hang on, Nee-san――! This, this can't be――! Why, why do you have to die, Nee-san――!? There is---there is no reason for you to die, Nee-san――!" Hisui's voice can no longer reach her. Her chest rising and falling, she just looks up at the deep, deep blue sky. "―― It's pretty. I could never go outside, but I always remembered the color of the sky." "Nee-san---Nee-san――?" "―― Just those little things were my days. Hisui-chan, Shiki-san, and Akiha-sama were there. And there was such a pretty sky overhead." "Yeah―― I can't remember it too well. Those fun things―― are starting to disappear." ―― Her energy drains away. The remaining light in her eyes is disappearing. That. I could not let it be. I take out my knife. My glasses are already off. All that is left--- "Shiki-sama, what are!" Hisui holds on to me. "I am going to save Kohaku-san. Please be quiet and trust me." I pull free and look hard at her body. ―― Just like the time with Yumizuka. That time, I found Yumizuka's polluted blood and "killed" it. So I should be able to kill the poison she drank. "---Gah." The headache gets worse. It feels like someone is stabbing my skull with a knife. It's so bad I want to close my eyes. "---" ―― I guess looking at something wrong in someone else's body is difficult. The pain warns me that this is surpassing the limits of my ability. "AH--ha, ah." My breathing explodes into harsh gasping. Bubbles escape from my open mouth. My entire world is red. As if all my bodily fluids turned into poison, my body is burning from the inside. "Ahhg---gaah!!" Yeah. But, still-- "Ku---ah, ahh---!" I stare at it, not caring if I go blind. --My senses disassociate. My world becomes a white sheet. As the sound of my blood vessels burning away roars in my ears, I quickly, before I am unable to move, find the poison in her body and kill it. The first scenery I've seen in a few days is this white examination room. "―― All set. It seems like you are fine, Shiki-kun. I do not see any cloudiness and your condition should not return. You can go back to your normal life now." The doctor continues scribbling away, as he's done these past few days. His face which I see for the first time looks somewhat kind. "Well then, take care. Yeah, but don't strain yourself for a while. You always seem to push yourself too hard." "---I understand. Thank you so much for your help." I bow with heartfelt thanks. And, I stand up from the chair. I go out into the hallway. In the waiting room is Hisui. Not having seen her face in days, I wave to her excitedly. Hisui quickly runs to my side to support me. "Well then, shall we go? We can meet Kohaku-san starting today, right?" Hisui nods. "―― Um, Shiki-sama. Is your body really okay?" Hisui looks up at me, full of worry. "Hey. A doctor is a person who can't let unhealed people go free. If I get to leave the hospital, that means I'm fine. I'm used to being in hospitals, so trust me." "-Yes. That is why I worry. There never was an instance where you would come back from the hospital fully healed." "―――― Hmph." ―― Hisui really talks a lot now. Well, that's the truth, so I can't disagree. "---Anyway, I finally got those bandages off my eyes. I can see your face and my body is healed, so there's no more problems. C'mon, let's go see Kohaku-san." Pulling Hisui, whose still wanting to say something, I walk towards Kohaku-san's room. -After that. After seeing me plunge my knife into Kohaku-san, Hisui panicked. But, after seeing that Kohaku-san's body was not harmed, that her breathing returned after that, and seeing me collapsing, Hisui ran to save all of us, even though she was still in a panic. As a result, Kohaku-san was saved. I fell into a condition where my eyes would not function in addition to the decrease in my physical body strength. ―― Well, I somehow understood that I went blind. When I stabbed my knife into her body, the only thing I was able to see were those "lines". So when I was told I went blind, it didn't shock me that much, but then, my sight came back shortly after. The examination revealed absolutely nothing wrong with my eyes, but only problems with my nerves. Rather than my cut nerves connecting themselves, it seems that it's more like the nerves which were numb healed up. ―― It seems like my eyes will not go blind that easily. Or it might be that even if I do go blind, I'll still see those "lines". ―― Well, those are trivial matters. The important fact is that Kohaku-san and I were saved. ―― But Kohaku-san wasn't fully saved. She was able to recover. But, in turn, she lost something. "Shiki-sama." "Ehyeah, go ahead. I think it's probably better if you went in first." After answering yes, she knocks on the door. A voice tells us to come in and we enter the room. Kohaku-san is the only one in the room. She sits up in bed and looks at Hisui and I. "――――――――" ―― Kohaku-san isn't smiling. With uneasy eyes, she looks at her guests. "Um―― May I please ask who you are?" With those words, Hisui's shoulders shake a bit. "We have come to see how you are doing. Please excuse us, Nee-san." Kohaku-san looks at Hisui with surprised eyes after she hears the word "Nee-san". Hisui sits down next to Kohaku-san. I don't want to be in the way, so I sit down on a chair by the wall. Kohaku-san looks uneasily back and forth between Hisui's face and mine. "Um―― I am sorry. It's a bit strange. I feel that I do know both of you, but I cannot remember either of you." Her voice sounds very apologetic. This isn't a joke or anything as she really does mean those words. -There is some problem with her memory. I think I was told so before by Hisui. Kohaku-san was no longer the Kohaku-san from before. ―― No, that's not quite right. The system of the brain can be divided into four functions: recording, preserving, playback, and recognition. And it seems that Kohaku-san has something wrong with her preserving function. The doctor said that she can return to her normal lifestyle, but―― she can't remember most of her past. ―― It isn't so much that she can't remember, rather, it is more like she lost it. The preservation of her memories up until now---all that information was lost, so there is nothing to remember. So Kohaku-san cannot remember me or Hisui. ―― Having Kohaku-san return to the way she was before really is a hopeless dream. I don't know if it was the near-fatal shock from the poison or if Kohaku-san closed it off herself. But, I know that the Kohaku-san has the body and heart she had before, but she has forgotten all about me, Hisui, and Akiha. "Um―――" Kohaku-san looks up at Hisui. "Yes," Hisui answers, and Kohaku-san hesitantly starts to speak. "Your face is the same as mine, might I ask who you are?" "-" Hisui's body freezes. But that is just for an instant. With a light smile, Hisui holds Kohaku-san's hand. "I am your little sister, Hisui." "Hisui―― chan?" She manages to let this response out. That is probably the most cruel response she could have given. But Hisui still smiles gently, and answers "Yes." "―― I am so sorry. I, do not remember anything about you, Hisui-chan, or that person over there. ―― Ahaha, I'm a little scared. I don't remember anything about you, Hisui-chan. Maybe there must be something wrong with me." Downcast, Kohaku-san looks like a lost child. Her face clouds over and her eyes are uneasy; she is not like Kohaku-san. ---But still. Hisui grips her hand tightly. "No, do not worry, Nee-san. No matter how uneasy you are, I will always be with you. ―― Like how you always protected me, I will always, always protect you from now on, Nee-san." Kohaku-san's face is pure bewilderment. After looking at Hisui in surprise, Kohaku-san thanks her. "Ehah, yes." Looking down in embarrassment, Hisui mumbles a response. "Uum, is there anything you need? Like, something to eat, or something you want?" Kohaku-san says yes and nods with her eyes in response to Hisui's attempt to hide her shyness. "―― There isn't anything I want to eat, but there is something I want. Can I ask you?" Kohaku-san does not look just at Hisui, but looks at me sitting by the wall, too. "Yes. What is it, Nee-san?" "―― I, think I never liked the name Kohaku. So---I, want a new name." "―――――― Name?" I wonder why. Once she says that, only one name comes to me. That name has been discarded and only remains in memories. "―――――― Shiki-sama." Hisui turns to me. ―― Is she thinking of the same thing? She looks at me as if she wants confirmation. "―――――― Mm." I nod in response. Hisui turns back to Kohaku-san and, "How does Nanaya sound?" tells her so. "――――― Nanaya." Kohaku-san murmurs it as if testing the sound. Right after, she lifts her face up as if she remembered something. "---Yes. I, think I like the sound of that. It seems, awfully nostalgic for some reason." Saying that, she smiles. Her usual smile that blossoms like a rose. ---Finally. For the first time since she's awakened, she smiles happily. ---The two of them talking looks perfectly natural. Naturally, the two of them peacefully pass the time as sisters. ―― I don't know if her losing her memory was good or bad. Since all of her memories were painful, maybe it was a good thing that it happened. Because from now on, there will be nothing but happiness. Forgetting all the sorrowful incidents, she can earn a normal happiness. "--" But, looking at this blue sky, I just can't help but think back. That young girl standing by the window. I know that the past for her is something to be forgotten about. But, stillif I could, I wanted that Kohaku-san to become happy. ―― But that is a wish that can no longer be granted. So I just have to end that wish right now. Underneath that longed-for blue sky. I imagine for the last time her care-free smile, like a lingering flower "Shiki-sama, may I please have a moment?" After we leave the hospital, Hisui suddenly asks me that question. "Eh――? Sure, what is it?" "Yes. We still have time, so there is somewhere I wish to go." "Somewhere you wish to go――?" Not understanding, I tilt my head. "Come on, let's go, Shiki-sama!" Hisui pulls my hand forcefully and starts running. "-" She takes me to a grassy plain outside of the city. Autumn is ending and the sky is deep. The wind that blows through the flowers and onto our faces seems to blow through our hearts. "Hisui――? Why did you want to come here?" "Hmm, who knows? To be honest, there really isn't a reason. It's just that when we were coming to the hospital, I saw this field from the train." Hisui says this trivially as she stands by my side. "―― I don't get it. This is a nice place, but it doesn't seem that special. If you wanted to play, we should go to another" "No. This is the right place to visit. I wanted to come not somewhere in the city, but somewhere quiet and beautiful, and it makes me feel positive. A place where you could return to your usual self." With a light smile, she looks up at me. "My usual selfHisui?" "Yes. Well, when you were in the hospital room, you looked so depressed. ―― I understand how you feel, and I'm glad you feel that way. But, that is not what Nee-san wanted." Hisui reaches out. She lightly places her hands on mine. "Is that not right? I think it is better if you cheer up. ―― Hey, Shiki-sama. You may not have realized it, but you smell like sunshine. That is the Shiki-sama that I like, and will always like." Her eyes look at me directly. Those eyes are really kind, and optimistic. Hisui is the one that smells like sunshine. Eight years ago. It feels like we returned to that time, when Akiha and I and her would run around the garden. "Really. I think I'm the gloomy one if you ask me." "You are just someone who does not start conversation that much. But to me--no, to us, you are like this open field." "--" Her fingers move. I feel her squeeze me tighter. "So there, please don't make that face, Shiki-sama. Akiha-sama was saved, and even Nee-san was saved. There is no reason for you to be sad. Nee-san is still alive. Then I am sure she will return to the way she was someday, and even if not, I will make her many times happier. You do not have time to be sad. Because we have to help Nee-san and Akiha-sama be happier from now on." "--" What she's saying is fairly preposterous. So I wonder why? After hearing those wordsI feel a ray of light shining into my gloomy heart. "-That's, right. I'm her big brother, so its only natural to do such a thing." Hisui nods. "―― Yeah. It might be hard, but we have to do it. Because I want them to be happy too." "--Yes. I know you can do it." Nodding strongly, she holds my hand against her chest. ―― I can feel her heartbeat. The delicate warmth of her body serenely blows like the wind through the grass into my own heart. "---Besides. If you do not cheer up, I would be very troubled." "Why?" I ask. Hisui's cheeks flush, but she still looks directly at me "―― You are the only one who can make me happy. I want to always be near your side, always be near your sunshine." She stands on her tiptoes to kiss me. The sky is high. Underneath that sky where there is no sadness, I receive the warmth of the one I love the most. From the field, is the gentle smell of the sunshine. Yeah, Hisui's words are exactly right. We lost a lot, but we haven't lost everything. The days will still go on into the future. Then, we have to go on, and try our best to make everyone live happily. "―― Thanks, Hisui." Holding her delicate body, I close my eyes. Tears flow down my cheeks, but there is no sadness. Life itself is fun enough, I've known that for a long time. Then. Holding Hisui's hand, I'll walk on and have no regrets--

*s528
Merci! And now, time for the fifth period lesson of the second day. The corner for the sake of the unfortunate Tohno-kun, who has met yet another Bad End, It is time for "Teach me, Ciel-sensei!" Let's see, the mistake this time is-. ―― Oh, no. That won't do. This event Tohno-kun is involved in right now is not something you can solve by yourself. Don't be so persistent and trust the people around you. You should ask for their help. I don't want to see Tohno-kun become a killer. "But, in a few years, Shiki will be called Shikiller, and will team up with the Knight of Vengeance to go hunt down the Dead Apostles." Arc-san, that is just what you hope for, not a fact. Alright, Tohno-kun. Ignore the person who doesn't even get one appearance in this route and enjoy the rest of the main story. "Awwww. I haven't done anything wrong, so why don't I get to appear-nyaa? I'm supposed to be the main heroine."

*s529
Merci! And now, the hint corner for the sake of the insane Tohno-kun who has come so far only to reach this Dead End, It is time for "Teach me, Ciel-sensei!" It is finally the sixth period of the second day. We are getting closer and closer to the end. "I envy you, Ciel. You get a lot of appearances. I'm the main heroine, but they still treat me like this scribble." Hey you, don't say weird things. That's fine. At least you have more dignity than me, the do-it-all character. "No-!! Unsatisfactory! I want to be dressed like you and be called smart!!" ―――― "No appearance! No appearance! No appearance! No appearance! No appearance!" "No appearance! No appearance! No appearance! No appearance! No appearance! Ciel-glasses! No appearance! No Ciel!" "No appearance! No appearance! No appearance! No appearance! No appearance! Ciel-glasses! Ciel-too plain! Ciel-get out! Ciel-glasses! Fake-Frenchie! Gun-fetish! Ciel-India!" ―――― (Anger) "Kyuuuuuuuuu――――――" Well, let's start the lecture. To say it directly, you need to re-submit. It looks like Tohno-kun could not attract Hisui-san's heart well enough. Go back to the fifth or sixth day and please try again.

*s530
You have reached Hisui's True Ending. Well done. Each heroine (with one exception) has two different kinds of endings. A True Ending and a Good Ending. After reaching one of the endings, please go back a little and readvance through the story. A different event should await you. Well then, thank you very much for playing up to this point. Let's meet again somewhere in Tsukihime.

*s531
You have reached Hisui's Good Ending. Well done. Each heroine (with one exception) has two different kinds of endings. A True Ending and a Good Ending. Since you can't reach Hisui-san's Good Ending without seeing the True Ending, you have now finished Hisui-san's route completely! Well then, thank you very much for playing up to this point. Let's meet again somewhere in Tsukihime. "Ciel-san. I also have something I must impart." Huh, Professor Roa? This is rare indeed for you to come to a place like this." "This circumstance is unique. I will get to the point right away. Now that you have cleared Hisui-san's route, there should be another choice for you on the first day. This is the unlocking of the last route in Tsukihime. ―― Well, even if I do not tell you this, it is very clear if you go to the graphic mode." That's right. Well then, please continue on and enjoy Tsukihime!